Cuntybaws

Nicola Sturgeon has just put his testicles up for sale on eBay.

Fuck off cunts, you're fooling nobody!

This "Aaaarr" bollocks is a fucking cunt's game and no mistake, but it's not quite as low as "Towel Day." I know where I'd stick their fucking Babel Fish, and it wouldn't be in their fucking ear!

The only good thing I can think of to say about him is that he's funnier than Lee Evans. Or Lee Nelson. Or Lee Mack.

Scotty doesn't usually get that upset about anything unless there's a South coast connection. Yep, sure enough...Pompey cunt. Give it another few weeks and I'm expecting to see Ronald Koeman's name up in lights.

Fucking brilliant! And if that chunky penis-dodger isn't available they could always get the weird cunt from 24 in to redivert some miltary satellites to provide HD quality surveillance footage of the incident that they weren't even fucking pointing at when it happened!

From Moss Side, so yes, about as low and as stupid as it gets. I'd post a picture, but I'd only be accused of pandering to stereotypes. Suffice it to say that the cunt got 17 years for attempted murder, which is a lot more than Oscar Pistorius is looking at for making a proper job of it.

Why don't you post him it and we'll see? I think Frank might have his address filed away somewhere...

The crime is that the "mystery killer" took out Jill Dando instead of Nick Ross. For professional reasons Mrs Baws does enjoy the odd true crime / serial killer program from time to time (there are entire channels dedicated to that shit, 24x7) but even she won't watch Crimewatch. They might as well just get Jeremy fucking Kyle to present it.

He looks like the sort of cunt who sits hunched over to catch his own shit before it hits the water so he can admire it, turning it over and over in his hands before, with the faintest little sigh, finally letting it fall and reluctantly flushing. I might just be imagining that, of course, but where there's smoke there's fire...

You been on mumsnet again, KC? I've fucking warned you all about that!

http://dioclese.blogspot.com/2014/05/niggers.html It's not advertising if someone else posts it...

Fuck, missed it! It must have been bad/good (delete as appropriate) to disappear so quickly too!

The contrarian in me wants to like her because everyone else hates her, but I can't. She is quite possibly an even bigger cunt than Vanessa Feltz, and that's a pretty big cunt!

Q. What's blue and fucks old ladies? A. Hypothermia.

Want to buy some lucky white heather?

Cunts that clap in time are cunts indeed, but cunts that clap out of time - especially at evangelical Christian services - are by far the biggest cunts of all.

Sounds like the very bitter voice of experience speaking. Let me guess - it was Mrs Cock's idea?

Surely Blue's Clues is too much of an intellectual challenge for you, Keith - I'd have thought Dora The Explorer was more your type. So to speak...

This isn't the furry four-legged quadruped I was expecting but what the fuck, all cats are grey in the dark.

Indeed. For the avoidance of doubt I should state that I have the utmost respect and admiration for the bravery and sacrifice of our armed forces. Once enlisted, for whatever reason, the poor grunt fuckers don't get to choose whether to patrol hostile dirt tracks in vehicles which might as well be made out of papier-mâché, and it is entirely right and proper that the state that they served looks after them when it all goes pear shaped. (Or should that be pineapple shaped?) The Invictus Games can fuck off, though.

I hope the greasy Salmond cunt is watching Last Night Of The Proms. There's a definite subtext to Rule Britannia tonight – something along the lines of, “Fuck you, and your non-existent navy. Square go, cunt? Any time!”

Nothing else has worked so far, So I’ll wish upon a star, Wondrous sparkling speck of light, I need a Jew...

It's claimed without the faintest hint of irony that this bathetic shite which is currently clogging up most of the BBC is the brainchild of Prince Harry. (Apparently copying something you saw on TV in America pretty much verbatim now constitutes original thought.) I am not a fan of the Paralympics either, with its multitude of sub-categories, but at least the winner of one of those events is demonstrably the best one-legged, deaf, Down's syndrome tiddlywinks player on Earth. The only qualifications for Invictus are (1) to have been too stupid to get a job as anything other than cannon fodder, and (2) to have been among the poorest at that. Forget wheelchair basketball, more practical events should really include “Ducking when you hear shooting” and “Not standing on suspicious half-buried metal objects”.