camberwell gypsy

My great grandmother apparently had an affair with the coal man. Everybody wondered why she needed coal in a caravan and why she had two black handmarks on her arse.

Sounds like Crosskeys in Wales.

Didn't Jack Duckworth and Jerry Lewis invent that scoring thing?

Everyone knows that the greatest poet that ever lived was Pam Ayres. Her brother Pubic was good as well. Oh all right then.

I'll get me burka!

Looks like he's about to give a speech.

Why do you have Yoko Ono as your avatar?

Fucking hell that was a close call.

It had to happen. Someone had to say it.

Saddam O'Sane owned a distillery in Baghdad!

If those fuckers had got there, the hill wouldn't have been off vertical at all.

Ah, that's from the book Zieg heil Pat by John Cunliffe. The Germans have invaded and Greendale has been taken over by nazis. Reverend Timms has been shot for hiding a radio in the vestry, Granny Dryden has been deported to a concentration camp for hiding guns in her shop for the resistance and Pat has been made the Gauleiter for the area.

Like I said before: a poor man's Rick James.

Agreed

Fucking slow on here tonight

Not tonight.

Fat American plods don't have that problem. They just fucking shoot them. Then say "freeze". Or is that the other way round?

Saw Level 42 back in '79. Mark King was fucking awesome on the bass.

Couple a bottled of prosseco should do it.

Can't be worse than Timmy Mallet can it?

I had my fill of seeing this in A&E. Heart attack and stroke victims in their 50s and 60s overweight being wheeled in, wondering why the fuck they were in there in the first place. "I don't understand it, I've never been ill before". Well get used to being fucking I'll from now on because the clocks ticking.

Mike Savage looks like he could be a serial killer.

Anything to bump up arrest rates.

He looks like a poor man's Rick James.

Never heard of her!