Ape™️

24 minutes ago, King Billy said:

I have my imaginary M4 valeted and waxed by some illegal Albanian and Romanian scumbags, to an eyesight endangering shine that would make Franks over polished Bellend look decidedly dull, at least once a fortnight. Mainly to impress the crowds of adoring pedestrians who watch me cruise past, smiling at all the pretty girls with my arm out the window, but also as I can’t stand living in an environment of filth and dirt. If I wanted that I’d live in France.

Why don’t you imagine yourself valeting and waxing your imaginary M4? I imagine you’d save a fortune.

20 minutes ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

Dear oh dear, Neil. Do you treat your home the same then? Walk in the cunt, eat/shit/sleep in the cunt, walk out the cunt the next day and so on. Let's live in a flea and rat infested shit hole right, as long as a home does what it's supposed to. 

You should be ashamed of yourself. 

😂😂

The number of cunts I see with a single bucket of water and a brush, scrubbing away at the paint of their very new and expensive cars, makes me shudder. No pre-rinse, no snow foam, no two-bucket system, no starting on the roof and working down. No - just a scratchy old brush, some washing up liquid and a manky chamois leather to really ensure the car is scratched to fucking pieces. Fucking idiots.

Fuck off.

52 minutes ago, entitled little cunt said:

If I could read your mind love , what a tale my thoughts could tell,Just like an old time move , 'bout a cunt with behavioural problems. 

Reading your mind would reveal one of those flick books that animate an image - in your case a drooling spastic continually clapping his hands together, like a seal at a circus.

11 minutes ago, entitled little cunt said:

What about Shaking Stevens ?I saw him going into sainsbury's in letchworth the other day .I wanted to run up and buckle my knees , jump slightly and land standing on my toes with both arms splayed out but thought better of it believing I'd end up in A&E.

Why did you want to do this? Were you desperate for people to think you were a spastic?

21 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I am one of the more reasonable and easy going members on here. But I’m also the most evil cunt when it gets mistaken for weakness. 
 I turn into satan and you don’t want me in your head. 
 So don’t get too cosy under my capacious wing. 
 

And @entitled little cunt… you’ve got Ape totally wrong. He won’t thank me for this but he’s actually one of the nicest cunts on here. You’re not a total lost cause, I would have euthanised you personally were that the case, but you still haven’t worked out the dynamic yet. 
 Hurry the fuck up and learn shit you dawdling spastic.

Thanks Eric - you’ve made me cry. I think the vast majority of people on here aren’t nasty, spiteful, devious fucking cunts in the real world. It goes without saying this doesn’t apply to @Frank. 

27 minutes ago, entitled little cunt said:

 .You're a clever bloke but you just can't help being over  emotional  can you. It's a shame .There's probably a nice person in you deep down but it's  covered  too much in the scar tissue of a nasty horrible little cunt to shine through .It's a shame. Not for us, but for you. In a few years you might think about that statement in a different  way to now , unfortunately  for  you most  people don't have that much patience to wait .Hence the reason you are like you are .Think about it.I know you can .

You know absolutely nothing about me, dopey. You are dealing with an online persona that I choose to adopt on CC, where I say things I’d never say in the real world - much like the vast majority of others on here (with the possible exception of @Eric Cuntman). Don’t confuse someone being angry and over emotional with someone taking the piss out of an easily-triggered cunt such as you.

Fuck off.

20 hours ago, entitled little cunt said:

 Just what the fuck has it got to do with you ?Why don't you calm down .You really do have problems .Your anger level is through the roof. You're a  bit of a cunt to be honest  , that's OK because I have the ability to live and let live .I dont feel the need or want to tell you to kill yourself or die.I just think you're plain fucking weird .

Answer the fucking question. 

1 hour ago, entitled little cunt said:

Well Frank  I think you're fighting a losing battle with them two.I hate to think either of their reactions should something even mildly cataclysmic happened in their lives .I reckon they'd both spontaneously combust .Fucking numpties .

Why are you addressing Frank in this reply? 

1 hour ago, entitled little cunt said:

Was in my local supermarket when I inadvertently stepped in the way of a lady who was blonde probably about 25 years ago but now needs help from a bottle .She gave me an intense stare and a tut then in an exaggerated  fashion went around me huffing and puffing .When Boy George was top of the charts she could have passed for mildly attractive but to try to pull it off in the same manner  so many  years after the event really is pushing it .Skin tight jeans that were holding her arse cheeks up and high heels that looked about a size nine with bulging bunion cushioning sides. She really looked like something that had been left out  in the sun far  too long .I'm all for sassy self belief but this geriatric spice grandmother really thought she was Francois Hardy in her prime .She looked more like Frank Bough in his .Females are becoming as big a cunt as males , if not worse. If there's a car up your arse these days it’s driven by a 32 year old slightly chubby female with oversize sunglasses and and a kid in the back and the inevitable baby on board sticker. Fucking cunts the lot of 'em.No wonder the world has gone gay cock mad , they're easier to live with than women apart from the copulation side of things .

Jesus fucking Christ. Why don’t you make your next nomination about the ever-changing colour of orange juice? You seem to be under the deluded impression that quantity outweighs quality. This is utter fucking horse shit. Please, just kill yourself.

30 minutes ago, ChildeHarold said:

Is Wragg such a non-entity that he's not worth a nom.  A Grindr story surely warrants a bit of a poke?  Unless Grindr is normalised in your world. 

Who gives a fuck? It’s a boring load of utter shit that contains not one ounce of humour or wit. It’s just another ejaculation of elc drivel that he seemingly needs to release on a daily basis, to prevent his own tedium causing him to explode.

So, to conclude: fuck off.

4 minutes ago, entitled little cunt said:

There's no helping some people .

Thanks for trying though - it means a lot that a CC veteran would offer such expert advice to little old me. Imbecile.

Just now, entitled little cunt said:

When it comes to tedious drivel you really do  seem to have the upper hand. Dont get all emotional again, it's not good for you .Crawl back into your little hovel and think about something to post that promotes an opinion concerning events with more gravitas. You actually managed it a week ago. Some were impressed but the majority actually surprised you could muster a few paragraphs  that were actually worth reading. Dont turn back now , we thought you had turned the corner .

This is spectacular! You pompous fucking idiot!

9 minutes ago, entitled little cunt said:

Many MP's have been running to the defence of sitting MP William Wragg. Mr.Wragg it seems has been on Grindr in his spare time rather than trying to ease the troubles of his constituents caused by the goverment he represents.Apparently Mr.Wragg compromised himself  and a rather unscrupulous individual took advantage of the position Mr.Wragg had placed himself in to gain information. How rare it is for an MP to be utterly incompetent .Of course his MP friends are  stating how awful it all is and parading Mr.Wragg as a victim.They called it a honey trap .I dont think there's much honey involved. An excrement trap is probably a more accurate description.The only victims in this whole gender bending load of bollocks are the British public who once again must be slapping their foreheads wondering just how fucking stupidly idiotic elected representatives  have become. What a bunch of  idiots, what cunts .

 

Oh look - another elc nomination. Another load of tedious fucking drivel. What on earth is wrong with you? 

1 hour ago, Frank said:

Fall foul of me again, you easily-triggered sap, and you'll know all about it. Meanwhile I suggest you time your posts wisely... you'll remain in the mod queue until I know you can be trusted. 

Welcome back.

 

Is it because you’re a weedy, effeminate fop in real life that you enjoy coming out with shit like this on CC? You absolute fucking bellend.

18 minutes ago, Penny Farthing said:

@Ape™️ I have consumed a lot of rice for breakfast it is now expanding in my stomach. I will explode later and my guts will be spread all over Devonshire.

I sincerely fucking hope so.

1 hour ago, Frank said:

Eric, are you saying - five times within the past three days - that you have some sort of allergic reaction to chocolate?

Fuck off and post another Rocky video, you repetitive hypocrite.

8 minutes ago, and said:

You do realise he hired @Wolfie to write his posts for him?

(when I say 'hired', it was more a case of quid pro quo, involving sexual favours)

Wanker.

On 31/03/2024 at 16:56, entitled little cunt said:

Ape has shown just recently he is capable of actually posting on topic and  appearing to be able to converse with a modicum of intelligence .I was going to congratulate him .His infernal idiotic utterings  mixed with the odd death threat was becoming tedious for everybody. Hopefully he's now  turned the extreme psychosis corner and can now communicate in a more wholesome manner befitting of myself and the rest of those on the site .

Fuck off.

14 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

You need to calm down a bit Harold. Increased body temperature will soften the glue on your forehead mounted stick and you won’t be able to type.

It’s a forehead mounted spacker stick - he shares it with @entitled little cunt. Choosing the right glue requires great skill.

41 minutes ago, Penny Farthing said:

I favour freezing them at birth and thawing them out when they reach 35.

I favour dunking you in liquid nitrogen for a couple of hours, then shattering you using a cricket bat with a breeze block nailed to it.

10 minutes ago, entitled little cunt said:

Funnily enough , Van gough's painting were intitally thought of as child like .That one eared cunt did ok  on it  after he died .

When you typed this hilarious reply, did you use your spell-it-like-it-sounds method to come up with gough? You know, the same method you use with words like polititians.

9 minutes ago, entitled little cunt said:

You as well, I like to be inclusive .You're learning .Considering my disparaging remarks about all the subjects you have identified I think its safe to assume they're all getting a cunting .Well done,  you win a cookie .

Ah, thanks for clearing things up. I’d mistakenly come to the conclusion you’d just posted the first load of bollocks that popped into your tiny mind. Again. Please accept my sincere apologies.

2 hours ago, entitled little cunt said:

A green party electoral hopeful had part of her finger bitten off by a dog  whilst putting a party  leaflet  through a letter box .It seems the dog is as fucked off with politics and polititions as the rest of the country. Fucking green party cunts .The use fossil fuels  to power economies have raised the living standards of ordinary people to an immeasurably high level compared to past generations. Get it out of the ground and burn it with abandon.

So what’s the cunt here? Getting the end of a finger bitten off, the Green Party, politics and polititions [sic], the use of fossil fuels or you?

1 hour ago, Penny Farthing said:

C'mon @Ape™️ try to be nice for just one day

You know my answer to this.