Wolfie

Police won't have too much trouble finding them. They'll be praying in the local mosque for Allah to grant them immunity.

Was he chasing a signed copy of your book, Colin?

The Alpes? Are they near the Hillamayas? Presumably your written English is a little more well-polished when completing Chartered Surveyor building reports on behalf homebuyers and solicitors.

Admittedly I admire Soft Hands's resilience. Each time he's thrown some bait, he responds with a 500-word+ explanation as to why he's right and everyone else is wrong. His rationale seems to encompass 'I couldn't give a fuck what you think', and yet, the verbose and repetitious ripostes very much suggest otherwise. Baws's expertise in exposing his fraudulently hasn't been required: he's done it himself. Let's briefly have a look at the facts: a late-middle aged and self-made millionaire with teenager's hands who still lives in a council house (albeit Costwold stone) – despite being an uppermost property developer and qualified Chartered Surveyor for the past 30 years; a bay-boy-dun-good geezah who used to drive a top-range Audi RS5 that was specifically targeted by a professional gang of Asians which a special branch of police assigned to such a task couldn't remedy; a man who chooses to bring his family to this site by boastfully claiming his teenage son has £50k sitting dormant in the bank; and, finally, someone who thinks a general downturn in the economy via further reduced interest rates and an unprecedented housing slump will benefit him greatly, even though a person of his alleged trade relies heavily on inflation. You couldn't make the cunt up. I've come to think of MC as the ultimate sewer-defying floater even Dyno-Rod's skilled engineers couldn't dispose of. Let's hope Rick comes to rescue sooner than later.

Reported.

Don't bite the hand that feeds you, Queefer.

MC's obviously content to see his son's £50k losing equitable value via negligible interest while he waits for Mark Carney's 35% property slump prediction to come into effect. But wait... if interest rates rise as he predicts, surely his son's £50k might be better off sitting in a high-interest bank account. He is a property developer after all – and chartered surveyor with 30+ years of experience. I wonder if sean5302 will be conveyancing on his son's behalf in future.

That's all very well, but where's the photo of your hands, 'old man'?

You really are an absolute cockcheese of Biblical proportions, aren't you? For someone who claims to be a property developer, you ought to know better than most that people who have the kind of cash (or mortgage for such purposes) to spend on developing their homes generally do so via way of earning equity over time through the sale or transfer of property. Inflated house prices benefit them and their investments hugely – especially those of higher social classes with substantial salaries, such as the types of people or cash or investment buyers who can afford to purchase homes or land in places such as Stow-on-the-Wold or Chipping Norton. To them, presumably your clients, a 35% reduction in property prices will be an absolute disaster, as will a further lowering of inflation. Even if you allegedly work in developing affordable housing (of which the Costwolds region is hardly renowned), the commission you receive will often be based on property sale value, which means this will have a negative impact on the industry as a whole, comprising builders, estate agents et al. Even pupils studying GCSE economics know inflated prices encourage spending and capital investments. My suspicions of you not being a property developer in one of the UK's most prestigious areas increases with each of your comments, though this rate of growth is slightly slower than the relentless progress of your esteemed idiocy.

You're trying desperately hard to become your Brick Top avatar's character, aren't you? I can imagine a typical evening conversation in one of your sleepy Cotswold retired neighbour's sitting rooms: 'I hear that complete dickhead next door has just pulled up on the driveway, Gladys'. 'Ah, you must mean the nouveau-riche twit who seems to have assumed the role of an important London gangster, Finley. Charles and Beatrice saw him attempting to show the bar girls his wotsit in the Dog & Fox last week.' Anyway, I thought you'd pussy out on me and not upload the photo, 'Soft Hands'.

Ironically, one of her novels is entitled 'Camberwell Beauty'. Presumably she thought of the name before catching a glimpse of you in the swimming pool.

A 'cuntard' indeed. Being a proud Briton, however, it's gratifying to see our rock stars taking things to a new level when it comes to picking on innocent photographers simply trying to earn a living. Has there ever been such a gargantuan wonker throughout the annals of time?

Oh, the right-wing cantankerousness came to me eons ago; it pains me to say it but I suspect I'm quite a bit older than you. In fact, I recall seeing a photo of your soft, skinny property developer's hands which had seemingly never made contact with any masonry, plaster or wood during their short life. You uploaded it via your post below, when your supposed Audi RS5 was allegedly stolen by a professional gang of Asians. After receiving an absolute cunting, your photo 'conveniently' became inaccessible. For the avoidance of doubt, would you care to upload it again, which will provide a clearer indication of your age? I'm waiting.

Welcome, Mr Roops.

You're probably right. I'm sticking to the confines of 'anal warlord'.

'Eavens! Just think: with MC's imminent demise, you'll be in pole position to redeem your status as the site's biggest idiot.

Shut up you ridiculous little prick. Quite a few punters are getting sick to the back teeth of your pointless arguing – and this includes me. You'll notice I've awarded you quite a few likes in the past, borne from my genuine appreciation of your freedom of expression, but I think the game's up for you so far as CC is concerned. The past week has revealed you to be the analogy of a stroppy teenager who won't take no for an answer when he's been refused an alcoholic drink at the bar. It amazes me that someone who portrays themself to be a Cotswold-based property developer (a role undoubtedly requiring people skills and compromise) can come across as being so vapid and cantankerous with the ineptitude to recognise the potential libel which often accompanies web-based commenting. You're not as free as you think you are. You're dealing with a moderator who's got a keen eye for stupidity; rather than accepting the way things are, you're having a tantrum each time someone points out your incredible ignorance. Instead of growing some thick skin, you've decided to compare yourself with Quentin Tarantino. Would you call someone who's black a 'noir' to their face? Would you turn away thousands of pounds worth of business because a potential client is black? I suspect the answer to both of these points is no. So far as the first is concerned, you'd get punched in the fucking chops. Your blatant xenophobia and inability to accept your fate is becoming a liability for the rest of us. Either shape up or fuck off.

Don't flatter yourself, Dave.

I notice your powers of perception are typically remarkable, Gyps. In spite of your obvious shortcoming, starting next week, I'm having some work done on the house – which starts with the arrival of a small scaffolding team. Sadly, it's a man short. Now you strike me as the sort of lass who isn't afraid of taking a shit with the door open. Fancy earning a bit of extra cash?

Some interesting points, MC. Once upon a time, there was a website which freely pioneered the cunting forum genre entitled Don't Wank Me Off – which eventually became known for its infamy, borne from boundary-pushing. Despite years of successful cunting from the web's most intelligent and funny writers, many of whom made an absolute mockery of the hypocrisy of the rich and famous (who liked to be in the public eye but only when it suited them), along came someone called Hairy Beard who sadly changed the modus operandi of internet cunting. Since this time, new online laws which apply to UK web users have come into force, which can be applied against anyone deemed to be submitting slanderous, racist, sexist, homophobic or defamatory comments. Your style of posting falls squarely into every category. While I wholeheartedly agree with your comment above in principle, your lack of experience on site forums such as this has become pitifully obvious. I've had my share of confrontation with Roops (in which she typically capitulates almost every time), however, without a watchful eye over comments from those such as yourself, you and your ilk risk putting this place plumb under the noses of those who could potentially sue the pants off the entire puntership – you included. All it takes is one comment to evoke a media storm. I'm all for free speech, but the playing rules have regrettably changed, and you'd be doing the rest of us as well as yourself a huge favour by recognising this. When will you ever learn?

Yeah? This BBC video is aimed squarely at members of its younger audience. When was the last time any private media outlet produced such utter biased horse shit like this?

It's that time of year again folks, when flying insects armed with potent venom run amok and cause havoc in their wake. Just look at what they did to this poor man's eyes and forehead!

How. Me Chief Punkape. Great Grammar Spirit tell me no need 'you' or 'the' in sentence. Me give impression of clubhouse prawn cocktail sand wedge, but in real world I am council estate prawn cocktail crisps sandwich. Common cunt.

Surprisingly, he can't find time to respond. You'd have thought someone who operated simultaneously as a solicitor and VW Director of Engineering would've perfected their time-management skills.

So you like summer weather and the prospect of year-round sunshine, yes? A one-way ticket to Damascus seems ideal. I'll pay – even though 80% of CC regulars would also willingly make a contribution. It'll be interesting to see how long it takes one of Allah's AK47-wielding disciples to catch a glimpse of your zebra's hosepipe swinging like a pendulum under your abaya robe before the beheading video appears.