Out of his brain on the train

[Eric Cuntman]

On 18 July 2019 at 20:43, Salty Piss Flap said:

I wonder if he was related to this dumb cunt...

Or this poor fuckwit... (Graphic content warning!!!)

 

Did you notice, in the electrocution one, that after he catches fire and falls over, there is a pressurised jet of vapour coming out of the penis area. 

It must be that his bladder boiled, and vented through what was left of his charred urethra, the steam mixing with smoke and bursting upward.

Science is fucking great.

[Guest Salty Piss Flap]

9 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Did you notice, in the electrocution one, that after he catches fire and falls over, there is a pressurised jet of vapour coming out of the penis area. 

It must be that his bladder boiled, and vented through what was left of his charred urethra, the steam mixing with smoke and bursting upward.

Science is fucking great.

I saw that but never could figure out what it was before.

Your level of perceptiveness is quite impressive indeed, my good man! 

Or as we would say over here.... Good catch!!! 👍

[Eric Cuntman]

5 minutes ago, Salty Piss Flap said:

I saw that but never could figure out what it was before.

Your level of perceptiveness is quite impressive indeed, my good man! 

Or as we would say over here.... Good catch!!! 👍

A little bit of help from The Maine Coon, Stephen King. It discusses boiling bladders in one passage from The Green Mile. 

I read 'Under The Dome' recently. He can still write, but he's lost his touch for delivering an ending.

[Roadkill]

1 minute ago, Eric Cuntman said:

A little bit of help from The Maine Coon, Stephen King. It discusses boiling bladders in one passage from The Green Mile. 

I read 'Under The Dome' recently. He can still write, but he's lost his touch for delivering an ending.

Under the Dome was 10 years ago. He's absolute shit these days. The last readable stuff he did was the Mr. Mercedes trilogy, and even that was far below his past quality.

[Neil]

23 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Did you notice, in the electrocution one, that after he catches fire and falls over, there is a pressurised jet of vapour coming out of the penis area. 

It must be that his bladder boiled, and vented through what was left of his charred urethra, the steam mixing with smoke and bursting upward.

Science is fucking great.

I heard that he's still in a korma

 

I'm 'ere all week

 

[Eric Cuntman]

8 minutes ago, Roadkill said:

Under the Dome was 10 years ago. He's absolute shit these days. The last readable stuff he did was the Mr. Mercedes trilogy, and even that was far below his past quality.

The Stand, was my favourite from his heyday. A decent 5 hour theatrical version wouldn't go amiss. That 80s one with Rob Lowe and Gary Sinise is a bit shit.

[Cuntybaws]

When he was good, he was very, very good - Salem's Lot, Firestarter, and The Dead Zone, for example. It all started going to shit with that "Dark Tower" fantasy bollocks, and he's mostly been accelerating downhill ever since.

[camberwell gypsy]

45 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Did you notice, in the electrocution one, that after he catches fire and falls over, there is a pressurised jet of vapour coming out of the penis area. 

It must be that his bladder boiled, and vented through what was left of his charred urethra, the steam mixing with smoke and bursting upward.

Science is fucking great.

That usually happens to me after a chicken phall.

[Eric Cuntman]

8 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said:

When he was good, he was very, very good - Salem's Lot, Firestarter, and The Dead Zone, for example. It all started going to shit with that "Dark Tower" fantasy bollocks, and he's mostly been accelerating downhill ever since.

Not long ago I revisited Salems Lot, and read that back to back with James Herbert's Domain. Comparing them as rival authors in the old days was laughable. Herbert was actually less literary than Shaun fucking Hutson. And that cunt couldn't go 4 paragraphs without using the term; 'blazing orbs', or describing the gas blowback system of a Beretta 92s

[Cuntybaws]

10 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Not long ago I revisited Salems Lot, and read that back to back with James Herbert's Domain. Comparing them as rival authors in the old days was laughable. Herbert was actually less literary than Shaun fucking Hutson. And that cunt couldn't go 4 paragraphs without using the term; 'blazing orbs', or describing the gas blowback system of a Beretta 92s

King is to Herbert as Herbert is to Hutson, and Herbert is fucking awful.

Hutson also had a fondness for a "liquescent cleft", although I can't remember if he actually used that phrase in "Slugs" where it would have particularly relevant.

[camberwell gypsy]

9 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Not long ago I revisited Salems Lot, and read that back to back with James Herbert's Domain. Comparing them as rival authors in the old days was laughable. Herbert was actually less literary than Shaun fucking Hutson. And that cunt couldn't go 4 paragraphs without using the term; 'blazing orbs', or describing the gas blowback system of a Beretta 92s

Loved James Herbert's stuff. He could get things across in 4 to 5 pages, where King would take fucking forever. I dont think Herbert's really dead. Read 'Ash' and you'll know why.

[Roadkill]

1 hour ago, Cuntybaws said:

When he was good, he was very, very good - Salem's Lot, Firestarter, and The Dead Zone, for example. It all started going to shit with that "Dark Tower" fantasy bollocks, and he's mostly been accelerating downhill ever since.

Basically he got shit after he quit coke. To this day I can't even figure out what the fuck is actually going on in the Dark Tower books.

All I got out of it is that there's some cunt from an alternate world where they're trained to be gunslingers, dropped into another apocalyptic world (or possibly the same one thousands of years later?) who has to build a team out of a smack head, a child and a skitzo black woman with no legs by walking to a beach with magical doors and pulling them out of them so he can chase down the baddy from The Stand - but they don't get to him because some other greater evil makes him kill himself first...?

The smack head dies and the kid and crippled black lady ditch the gunslinger, who makes his way to the Tower alone only to open the door at the top and... well then you're back to the start of the first book. Before this happens King even addresses the reader directly in the book - telling them they really wont like the ending. So basically the entire series of books is a metaphor riddled pile of self indulgent, meaningless shite - and the end only takes you back to the beginning. The twat.

[Eric Cuntman]

50 minutes ago, Roadkill said:

Basically he got shit after he quit coke. To this day I can't even figure out what the fuck is actually going on in the Dark Tower books.

All I got out of it is that there's some cunt from an alternate world where they're trained to be gunslingers, dropped into another apocalyptic world (or possibly the same one thousands of years later?) who has to build a team out of a smack head, a child and a skitzo black woman with no legs by walking to a beach with magical doors and pulling them out of them so he can chase down the baddy from The Stand - but they don't get to him because some other greater evil makes him kill himself first...?

The smack head dies and the kid and crippled black lady ditch the gunslinger, who makes his way to the Tower alone only to open the door at the top and... well then you're back to the start of the first book. Before this happens King even addresses the reader directly in the book - telling them they really wont like the ending. So basically the entire series of books is a metaphor riddled pile of self indulgent, meaningless shite - and the end only takes you back to the beginning. The twat.

That sounds like a Clive Barker idea. Without the finesse.