Roadkill Posted March 31, 2020 Report Share Posted March 31, 2020 15 minutes ago, 'eavensabove said: By what I can gather, the new emergency currency being introduced goes by the name of "Buttcoin" and it is destined to become The Lord of Your Rings, until you can get down to Barclays. You'll be alright, 'ev. The benefit of the ornamental glass sculpture market is that it can't get any worse no matter the circumstances. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted April 9, 2020 Report Share Posted April 9, 2020 On 25/03/2020 at 23:34, White Cunt said: Most of the pleb who are stockpiling food, will also feel compelled to eat the lot. Yep, that helps, keeping the cunts indoors, grazing for months. Not one of the Fritzls has caught Chink flu. FACT. Worth further investigation? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 'eavensabove Posted April 9, 2020 Report Share Posted April 9, 2020 On 14/03/2020 at 01:35, Mike Hunt said: Why haven't these absolute cunts been nominated yet? Anyway, I've just nominated the selfish, cunting bastards cos I'm having to use the wife's favourite curtains. At first, I couldn't decide which pasta to stockpile, but then the penne dropped. I was fortunate enough to grab a can of Alphabet pasta. It could have spelt a disaster. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted April 10, 2020 Report Share Posted April 10, 2020 1 hour ago, 'eavensabove said: At first, I couldn't decide which pasta to stockpile, but then the penne dropped. I was fortunate enough to grab a can of Alphabet pasta. It could have spelt a disaster. Catheters annoy me. They're always taking the piss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted April 10, 2020 Report Share Posted April 10, 2020 1 hour ago, 'eavensabove said: At first, I couldn't decide which pasta to stockpile, but then the penne dropped. I was fortunate enough to grab a can of Alphabet pasta. It could have spelt a disaster. You're getting on my nerves talking about the alphabet. U taking the P? A? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 'eavensabove Posted April 10, 2020 Report Share Posted April 10, 2020 9 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said: You're getting on my nerves talking about the alphabet. U taking the P? A? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted April 10, 2020 Report Share Posted April 10, 2020 On 14/03/2020 at 01:35, Mike Hunt said: I'm having to use the wife's favourite curtains. You know your marriage is in trouble when you’ve got separate curtains. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 'eavensabove Posted April 10, 2020 Report Share Posted April 10, 2020 (edited) 3 minutes ago, King Billy said: You know your marriage is in trouble when you’ve got separate curtains. This is a time when you should draw on your resources and pull yourselves together. Edited April 10, 2020 by 'eavensabove WASHING MY HANDS FOR 20 SECONDS Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 What is it with all these shops that seem to sell polish? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 'eavensabove Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 (edited) 1 hour ago, Dawn Chorus said: What is it with all these shops that seem to sell polish? As with like most shops that are still allowed to trade, they are cleaning-up, DC. Unless of course, you're referring to The Polish, in which case they can be rendered down to accompany linguine. Or "Passtaover" as it is known to the yids. You may wish to stockpile some Quilted Velvet if you're considering the latter option of the two. Edited April 11, 2020 by 'eavensabove WASHING MY HANDS FOR 20 SECONDS Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 4 hours ago, Dawn Chorus said: What is it with all these shops that seem to sell polish? There's probably lots of women out there, due to boredom, polishing their knockers Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bernard Fuck Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 18 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: There's probably lots of women out there, due to boredom, polishing their knockers Are you one of them and if so,do you put the polish on your knees and let nature take its course? Asking for a friend. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 5 hours ago, Dawn Chorus said: What is it with all these shops that seem to sell polish? Polski Sklep. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 On 10/04/2020 at 01:50, camberwell gypsy said: Catheters annoy me. They're always taking the piss. Colostomy bags are full of shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Cunt-End Of The World Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 On 09/04/2020 at 23:13, King Billy said: Not one of the Fritzls has caught Chink flu. FACT. Worth further investigation? Women are like fine wines, best left to mature in the cellar Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 8 minutes ago, King Billy said: Colostomy bags are full of shit. In the days of writing on patient notes, if a patient came to us complaining of constipation, I used to put 'FOS' means Full of Shit. Another one, especially if they came in late friday afternoon was 'DFK DFC' meaning Don't fucking know, don't fucking care' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 1 minute ago, camberwell gypsy said: In the days of writing on patient notes, if a patient came to us complaining of constipation, I used to put 'FOS' means Full of Shit. Another one, especially if they came in late friday afternoon was 'DFK DFC' meaning Don't fucking know, don't fucking care' If that’s the sort of things that go on in our NHS Gypps I’m in somewhat of a dilemma. Next Thursday night do I stand at the front door banging a saucepan for the heroes of the health service, or do I phone for an ambulance and when they show up crack both the piss taking cunts in the jaw with my knuckleduster? Thanks a fucking lot Gypps you cunt. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 2 minutes ago, King Billy said: If that’s the sort of things that go on in our NHS Gypps I’m in somewhat of a dilemma. Next Thursday night do I stand at the front door banging a saucepan for the heroes of the health service, or do I phone for an ambulance and when they show up crack both the piss taking cunts in the jaw with my knuckleduster? Thanks a fucking lot Gypps you cunt. Ithangyow! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Last Cunt Standing Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 13 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: In the days of writing on patient notes, if a patient came to us complaining of constipation, I used to put 'FOS' means Full of Shit. Another one, especially if they came in late friday afternoon was 'DFK DFC' meaning Don't fucking know, don't fucking care' Did a junior doctor ever offer you a TUBE without being TTFO? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 1 minute ago, Last Cunt Standing said: Did a junior doctor ever offer you a TUBE without being TTFO? No. That never happened. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 'eavensabove Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 7 minutes ago, King Billy said: If that’s the sort of things that go on in our NHS Gypps I’m in somewhat of a dilemma. Next Thursday night do I stand at the front door banging a saucepan for the heroes of the health service, or do I phone for an ambulance and when they show up crack both the piss taking cunts in the jaw with my knuckleduster? Thanks a fucking lot Gypps you cunt. ? you can phone until you're blue in the face. Trust me with this one, they won't show up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Last Cunt Standing Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 2 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: No. That never happened. No, well I imagine it was a little more difficult back then, what with you carrying a lamp as you scuttled between beds in the Crimea while trying not to trip over your hooped skirt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 'eavensabove Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 2 minutes ago, Last Cunt Standing said: No, well I imagine it was a little more difficult back then, what with you carrying a lamp as you scuttled between beds in the Crimea while trying not to trip over your hooped skirt. Careful. She'll put her curse on yer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Last Cunt Standing Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 7 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: No. That never happened. Have they reactivated your NMC pin and shoved you back into hospital yet then? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Last Cunt Standing Posted April 11, 2020 Report Share Posted April 11, 2020 15 minutes ago, 'eavensabove said: Careful. She'll put her curse on yer. Nah. The only thing I ever got off a nurse was a filthy look over the notes trolley when I asked her why her bedsheets at home didn’t have hospital corners. Midwives, on the other hand, bang like Chinese fireworks and smile sweetly afterwards. Filth. They spend so long around women on their backs panting it completely skews their idea of normal. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.