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Cap'n Cunt

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About Cap'n Cunt

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    Veteran cunt

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  • Location
    A big house with three shitters
  • Interests

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390 profile views
  1. By the sound of it, it'd be more fun in the cooler. At least you wouldn't be subject to the childish tantrums of a boring left-wing twat.
  2. Maybe he's caught ectoplasmia.
  3. Yeah, what have the Romans done for us??
  4. He's 'speaking in tongues'. I'm scared.
  5. The only tit-related option, possibly, but he could also have amused himself by hunting down the pubic lice in her overgrown ladygarden. I have done research, and have discovered that whilst there are many portraits of Jane Austen online, none of them show either her shit-smeared jugs or her unkempt mingebeard. Ironically, had she only lived another 84 years, she could have availed herself of the Gillette Safety Razor and had a proper photo of her shaven haven preserved on t'interweb for eternity.
  6. Edgar Winter should have had his hands chopped off. Mediocre cunt.
  7. I reckon we should invade Mongolia then, and appropriate all the Mongs. Imagine having your own personal Mong - you could teach it tricks, and maybe even train it to wheel itself down to the corner shop to fetch you 20 Rothman's Superkings and a bag of donuts.
  8. I don't think Rembrandt was a kiddie fiddler, so you shouldn't compare him to Rolf Harris.
  9. Fly to Vegas, hire a motorcycle, ride it to California, go up the coast road as far as Oregon, then back to Vegas. Then kill yourself and save the plane fare home.
  10. Yeah but I bet she'd let you do really dirty stuff to her, not like those flirty young things that tell you your cock smells like a Frenchman's pantry, and refuse to let you shit on their tits.
  11. If I was him I'd have 'I fucked the queen' on my headstone
  12. I wish someone would perform FGM on you. There'd be nothing left, seeing as you're just a huge clitoris.
  13. You are Rick_B and I claim my £5
  14. 'We don't really know what we're angry about, but we're pretty fucking furious all the same. Look, I've made a banner'. 300 social justice wankers attempting to bring down the government, get 'justice' for the silly cunts who set their flats on fire, and moaning about how badly poor people are treated. Well, GET A FUCKING JOB, instead of dicking around waving placards and give YOUR fucking wages to poor people then. And another bunch of leftie twats proclaiming 'Housing is a right, not a priveledge'. It's not a fucking right, at all. Get some mud and sticks and build your own fucking house, then. And now my fucking neighbour has lit his barbeque. Has he no fucking respect??
  15. It was a racist fire. I have it on good authority that all the bodies recovered so far have been black.