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Fucking Fake E-mails


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Upon opening my email account this morning, I at first thought I'd instantly turned into a popular bastard, having over 180 'emails' in the Coitus inbox. Further investigation revealed a further 61 I'd apparently sent, including several to some of you cunts. Once opened, they turn out to be, among other shit, invitations to vaginoplasty consultations, spank mags and free trial raspberry ketone shit. Apologies to any cunt here who's received any, but what I'm more concerned about is how these 'health mag' cunts know I've got an 8" cock. I think a certain porn bazaar in Rotherham may have fucked up my latest Fisting Butter order.

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