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Smart phones, dopey cunts


Bubba C

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After sone brain-dead zombie kicked the bucket after wandering in front of a moving vehicle whilst looking at their phone, ze Germans have decided to install traffic lights in the pavement to try and prevent it from happening again. 

Surely Darwin's theory of natural selection is evident and as phones get smarter, people get dumber, and those incapable of performing 2 basic tasks simultaneously should be as made dead as fuck. 

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/technology/2016/04/26/german-city-installs-traffic-lights-in-pavements-to-protect-text/

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Guest Drew P Pissflaps

and now if one of the LED's fail or becomes faulty then the local highways authority becomes culpable through contributory negligence when another kraut cashes in their Deutschemarks.

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Guest Gong Farmer

I laughed my tits off a couple of months back at some stupid goon for riding her bike into a parked car while she was transfixed by her mobile phone. Fucking funny with the initial thoughts being. "Fucking good and I hope it fucking hurt you silly cunt." 

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Guest DingTheRioja

Some bird was driving down a one way street, dead straight, dry, clear day, and somehow managed to jump the car 10 foot sideways and take out the corner of a house at full 30mph.... it's taken about 4 months to fix the house with 3 big fuck off RSJs and 3 ton of breeze blocks... they're still finishing off the painting.

 

Still, she managed to "like" some Facebook comment her mate just posted.

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Guest Bill Stickers
Just now, DingTheRioja said:

Some bird was driving down a one way street, dead straight, dry, clear day, and somehow managed to jump the car 10 foot sideways and take out the corner of a house at full 30mph.... it's taken about 4 months to fix the house with 3 big fuck off RSJs and 3 ton of breeze blocks... they're still finishing off the painting.

 

Still, she managed to "like" some Facebook comment her mate just posted.

An anecdote fit for a fat, lonely, bald, boring cunt who props up a bar somewhere in Yorkshire dribbling in the complimentary bar snacks.

Have another bag of pork scratchings and fuck off home ding.

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5 minutes ago, DingTheRioja said:

Some bird was driving down a one way street, dead straight, dry, clear day, and somehow managed to jump the car 10 foot sideways and take out the corner of a house at full 30mph.... it's taken about 4 months to fix the house with 3 big fuck off RSJs and 3 ton of breeze blocks... they're still finishing off the painting.

 

Still, she managed to "like" some Facebook comment her mate just posted.

What the fuck is this shit? Ding, are you okay in the head?

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Guest Manky
Just now, Bubbles said:

What the fuck is this shit? Ding, are you okay in the head?

Call me a cunt if you wish, but I really enjoy anecdotes about one way streets. Oh, and penguins.

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Guest Manky
Just now, Bubbles said:

Cunt

No, it's a historical thing. In Norwegian winters in the 1970's, they taught me how to survive by eating penguins.

But in the cold weather, it was a cunt to get the wrappers off wearing thick gloves.

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Just now, Manky said:

No, it's a historical thing. In Norwegian winters in the 1970's, they taught me how to survive by eating penguins.

But in the cold weather, it was a cunt to get the wrappers off wearing thick gloves.

This would've scored highly on the Sicki thread. It's one of the better jokes. 

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Guest Quincy Cockfingers
7 hours ago, Bubbles said:

After sone brain-dead zombie kicked the bucket after wandering in front of a moving vehicle whilst looking at their phone, ze Germans have decided to install traffic lights in the pavement to try and prevent it from happening again. 

Surely Darwin's theory of natural selection is evident and as phones get smarter, people get dumber, and those incapable of performing 2 basic tasks simultaneously should be as made dead as fuck. 

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/technology/2016/04/26/german-city-installs-traffic-lights-in-pavements-to-protect-text/

I'm glad he's dead.

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