Guest Mingeeta Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 35 minutes ago, 'eavensabove said: It's those poxy 'pour-youself' coffee machines that get up my goat. Half a dozen choices from a range of gluck which dribbles from chrome plated dogs cock into an lipstick-stained cup, followed by countless sachets of sugar & tubs of milk(?) to try to make something to quench. So long as its 'frothy' any shite will do. THEN, you get asked what it is you've got? I remember at Keele services on the M6 asking for a coffee and when they repeated back a load of bollocks, I just said yes, wish I hadn't. Paid £2.70 for a shitty little cup the size of a thimble. As for the handle, what was the fucking point of having one, you can't even hold the fucking thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 5 minutes ago, Mingeeta said: I remember at Keele services on the M6 asking for a coffee and when they repeated back a load of bollocks, I just said yes, wish I hadn't. Paid £2.70 for a shitty little cup the size of a thimble. As for the handle, what was the fucking point of having one, you can't even hold the fucking thing. Thimble size coffee cups are ordinary size coffee cups for dwarfs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Mingeeta Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 4 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: Thimble size coffee cups are ordinary size coffee cups for dwarfs I'll stand up next time I order, thanks for the heads up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 'eavensabove Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 41 minutes ago, Mingeeta said: I remember at Keele services on the M6 asking for a coffee and when they repeated back a load of bollocks, I just said yes, wish I hadn't. Paid £2.70 for a shitty little cup the size of a thimble. As for the handle, what was the fucking point of having one, you can't even hold the fucking thing. Try asking for an extra sugar! Anyone would think that you swore at them... and what's with the lolly-stick that you get to stir the shit with? I wouldn't mind, but it's nowhere close to drinkable despite loading up with extras, and heaven bid if you hit the wrong button... "Look what yer doing you cunt of a customer customer! yer spillin' stuff everywhere you cunt! I'm a gonna have to wipe dat wive me cloff nahh!" Anyway, as for the lolly-stick malarkey, whilst waiting for the coffee(?) to cool to a temperature that wont give me more burns than a Grenfeller, I take my hands to task in their carpark: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 4 hours ago, Rev said: My middle daughter works part-time in Arsebucks while she's at uni. The fucking dregs she has to work with there have the collective IQ of a fucking Toblerone. One of the cunts is a mincing twink who introduces himself as a gender-neutral, non-binary "person", who has "bad mental health days" on a constant basis. He claims he got to Round 2 in some pansy fucking shithouse TV talent show a while back, wears lipstick and women's underwear for his Facebook profile and is a whining bitch. He tried to publicly humiliate my daughter a few months back, so I threatened to rip his fucking Jacobs off at the till and rag-doll the cunt all over the foyer. Fucking bellend burst into tears. Cunt. Video please, I could do with a laugh today. 1 hour ago, 'eavensabove said: ... as to why I don't work for any other cunt and neither do I employ the uses of. I aint one for ticking boxes and neither do I belong in an applicants one. This old discrimination bollocks has gone AWOL. First, you couldn't employ a scaffolder unless you'd interviewed 20 Dykes, or had to use the services of a Punkers if you were looking for an housemaid... If that wasn't bad enough, NOW, you have no alternative but to either employ a Nip, Yip, a Gay Pole or a Spack-Pak, or be one yourself if you want a job. Work experience or suitability doesn't even enter into it, and if they wanna Damadam twice a week, wear a Burger & face Mekka, you not only have to suffer it but also have to pay for & provide provisions for them to. You should have gone to the pub that was next to The Arena in Middlesbrough, any Friday or Saturday you'd get to pick between 100 dykes or scaffolders, the dykes where probably better scaffolders... Who's the northeasterner? What was that pub called? It's now where LIDL etc is I think... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 'eavensabove Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 3 minutes ago, DingTheRioja said: Video please, I could do with a laugh today. You should have gone to the pub that was next to The Arena in Middlesbrough, any Friday or Saturday you'd get to pick between 100 dykes or scaffolders, the dykes where probably better scaffolders... Who's the northeasterner? What was that pub called? It's now where LIDL etc is I think... I'd not go Northeast for jack shite. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 3 minutes ago, 'eavensabove said: I'd not go Northeast for jack shite. Good, suits me and the other cunt just fine.... whoever he is.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 'eavensabove Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 1 hour ago, Mingeeta said: I remember at Keele services on the M6 asking for a coffee and when they repeated back a load of bollocks, I just said yes, wish I hadn't. Paid £2.70 for a shitty little cup the size of a thimble. As for the handle, what was the fucking point of having one, you can't even hold the fucking thing. You've got it all wrong Minge. They're for the Ketchup. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 I have to be in dire circumstances to purchase any of this swill. I buy mountain grown coffee with a rich dark roast and ask them to give the beans a fine grind. The powdery heavenly goodness arrives a few days later. I put my grinder in the bin, when you need a fix and have to grind it first is bollocks. As far as the sissified shitstabbers at arsebucks, the lisping, limp wristed mincing fucking faggots should be taken to a rock quarry and made to drag slabs of marble from the bottom of the pit to the finishing area. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 1 hour ago, 'eavensabove said: The first model that Ape ever built. lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 'eavensabove Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 2 minutes ago, Witheredscrote said: The first model that Ape ever built. lol Almost... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rick_B Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 7 hours ago, Alfie Noakes said: Human fecal matter has been found in samples from Costa, Starbucks and Cafe Nero. Ice samples were contaminated by bad hygene practises. Always knew they were shit and only cunts pay those prices for sweat shop coffee. Smaller coffee shops have better coffee and staff that care! More detail here. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-40426228 The problem is that town and city centre rents are now so high only the chains selling crap frothy coffee for three quid a cup can afford them. Most of the little coffee bars and cafés that sold decent coffee have gone under. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eddie Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 24 minutes ago, Rick_B said: The problem is that town and city centre rents are now so high only the chains selling crap frothy coffee for three quid a cup can afford them. Most of the little coffee bars and cafés that sold decent coffee have gone under. Then they should have sold their coffee for 3 quid... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 I drink tea. It's so much easier. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tata Steely Dan Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 9 hours ago, Alfie Noakes said: Smaller coffee shops have better coffee and staff that care! Nah, not always. Lots of those small shops try and compete in the coffee arms race by brewing strong and disgusting coffee. A coffee that goes down like a cup of hot burnt soil-juice and gives you Crohn's disease two hours later. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest 'eavensabove Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted June 28, 2017 Report Share Posted June 28, 2017 Wonder how many different samples of DNA were found in these shit vending establishments. We gave costa a swerve today and made our own coffee at home. Shitcunts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest N/A Posted June 29, 2017 Report Share Posted June 29, 2017 14 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: It's the look of bewilderment they adopt if you dare to ask for a normal cup of coffee, that annoys me, these fuckwits are seemingly unable to grasp the concept of coffee, hot water, sugar and milk. And tell you that they only sell, chockamochaccinolahte americano double skinny, when you explain again that you just want normal fucking Nescafé with milk and sugar, they continue to stare blankly, unable to grasp the complexities of pouring water into a cup. I'd rather take my chances in a greasy spoon cafe. Bollocks to the UK of A. That will be £36 quid sir Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest N/A Posted June 29, 2017 Report Share Posted June 29, 2017 Just now, Monumental cunt said: That will be £36 quid sir Shit is extra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Drew P Pissflaps Posted June 29, 2017 Report Share Posted June 29, 2017 Customer: "This coffee tastes like mud!" Barista: "I'm not surprised, it was only ground a few moments ago" (MikeD - Book of shit jokes June 14 to August 16) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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