scotty

Even you baws, with your borderline autism, ocd and computer skills couldn't possibly reproduce the sheer, unmitigated fuckwittery that was wad. It simply can't be done. That was the gold standard of idiocy; others have tried and failed to live down to it, but let's face it, even prof b looked like a fucking genius compared to helen.

What is this utter bollocks about? I know it's easter, but wtf?

I very much doubt that scrotes has been banned. He's more likely to have croaked, or fucked off on holiday.

...to my nigerian account.

I'm watching Sweden v Brazil in the women's beach volleyball. There's already been a wrist injury, but I should be ok by wednesday.

I'd forgotten that, wasn't it shirley crabtree or something? Either way, he was a fat cunt.

I agree, but I never felt comfortable about the Big Daddy "splash". Always left my little sister in tears, that did.

I'm not having such insults. Punkers outfit of choice is a gimp suit and mask.

If you saw her I doubt you'd be paying her, luke.

I'm not saying the romance has gone out of our marriage. But whenever I have sex with the mrs nowadays I leave twenty quid on her bedside table.

I think bill might be developing Internet Paranoia Syndrome snatch, and implying that we are the same user with multiple ids. It's not unheard of, especially on here. Even the fucking mods occasionally succumb to it, spotter once emailed me asking that I should desist from posting as agent peanut, and which of those accounts did I want deleting. Given that I've never posted under any other username on here, I told him he could delete the peanut one but that the bloke might not be too chuffed about it.

Bit early to be knocking back the booze isn't it, bill? Still, it gives me an excuse (as if I needed one.)

It's rare to see a bird with such an interest in motors. Good work love, keep it up.

My 48 hour prediction also holds firm, frank. Sadly, betfred won't even quote me odds on it.

I quite miss that character. Whoever it was, they were usually good for a laugh.

Can we start a sweepstake? I reckon 48 hours for frankie.

No, he wouldn't. Therefore he wouldn't care.

Blunkett's ridden a few bucking broncos in his time, usually married ones. And he doesn't care whether it's dark.

I went into a dingy gym, and a huge bodybuilder sidled up to me. "Are you the guy with the 'roids?" he whispered furtively. I said "no, I just didn't feel like sitting down."

I love it when you talk dirty.

I haven't written a cheque in 10 years. However, if a customer wants to pay me with one and that's the only way I'll get paid for the job, I'll take the cheque rather than get a strop on and tell them to fuck off.

I have to agree with this. I occasionally need to pay in cheques at the local post office, the bank being fucking impossible to park nearby. (that's another cunt for another day.) Invariably, it will always be pension day. Fucking always. When I see this shuffling line of coffin dodgers hacking up their lungs and moaning about their various self-inflicted ailments, I just know I'm in for a minimum half hour queue so I go to the fucking pub next door instead.

I'm currently sitting underneath these filthy welsh bitches waiting for the interval soundcheck jacko, christ they have some bangers on them. I wonder how much they'd want for a swift one off the wrist. I might even waive the fee.

...and the fucking ginger cunt still somehow managed to fuck billie piper. Bastard.

You're watching too much porn, baws.