Eric Cuntman

You thick fucking cunt Punkers.

You're alright, I think. But coming out with your war-face painted on at your stage of development won't end well. Eddie's a shark. You're not yet. Look at the fucking pickle that Salty's gotten himself into. Pace yourself.

You can't talk to Eddie like that. Do you know how rich he is?

No thanks. There's all spunk round your mouth. Dirty fish.

Pre diet.. yeah, a bit.

I've started picturing him as Victor Meldrew. I haven't got anyone else who can FedEx me reactivation parts. Listed as lawn mower spares.

Them fuckin Chinese really will eat anything.

Fuck that. Your head must feel like it's just gone 15 rounds with an angry Mike Tyson. This'll cheer you up. An extract from the transcript of the Gibraltar enquiry, after the SAS shot dead some Provo's... Judge; "Why did you shoot the suspects 13 times?" Soldier F; "Because the Browning Hi-Power only holds 13 rounds, sir." lol

I am the Lindbergh baby, I wasn't going to miss that one.

Oh. That cunt that looks like Tim Curry. Is that a nickname applied to BoJo then?

Had worse.

If Citroen, Peugeot or Renault have any involvement in constructing the inflatables, the cunts will never get further than a mile from Calais. And it's a scientific fact that blacks can't swim.

A black woman.

Look, I'm not going to bother coming up with any more brilliant ideas if you're just going to spoil it with nob-gags.

I think the word 'Detector' is ruining the alliteration. 'Proper's Propietary Puppet Pointer-Outer', has much more of a ring to it.

I've fuck all interest in France. I did used to fancy Vicki Michelle out of 'allo allo' though.

He's a very naughty boy.

Could someone please enlighten me as to who, or what is 'animal'? and can we have a rule that at least the title of a nomination has to make fucking sense.

If he was brown, I don't care.

50 quid and I'll fix it, and modify the piston and transfer port, giving it the power of a .22 Luger.

My perfect day would be a tour of Fabrique Nationale in Belgium. The spiritual home of my idol, John Browning.

You've become very bitchy, since you finally accepted that you're finished here. Frattled.

Posh cunts from Streatham, call it 'St Reatham'.

They once showed something that he made on 'Blue Peter'.. .. A badly vandalised garden.

This place reminds me of Wimbledon football team in the 80s. One cunt kicks the ball up the pitch, and all ten of them chase after it. Lol. Dennis Wise is a beady little cunt.