Vape Pens (subsection Cannabis)

[Guest Ollyboro]

A few years ago I was in a branch (not a pub) of Wetherpoons. I got the first round in, so after taking my seat , didn't need to stand up again for ages. Just as I started on my fifth pint of Old fucking Rosie I realised I was desperate for a piss. I stood up and attempted to walk to the toilet. My head knew where I wanted to be, but my feet reacted like somecunt had wrapped cling film around my legs and pointed me in the wrong direction. The thing is, when I was in the toilets, I saw one of those notices in a poly pocket that they put on pub toilets doors. The notice that tells you that the toilet gets checked on the hour -EVERY HOUR!!. And is signed by the member of staff who checked the toilet out. Spunker's name was on this sheet 147 times (the maximum) and he doesn't even work there.

Which brings me to my vape pen. I've started using one to smoke cannabis with. It's amazing how unstoned you feel, until you are. Put it this way, I started typing this nom 2 days and 16 Battenburgs ago. 

Cunts.

[scotty]

This is going to go badly. 

[Eric Cuntman]

44 minutes ago, Ollyboro said:

A few years ago I was in a branch (not a pub) of Wetherpoons. I got the first round in, so after taking my seat , didn't need to stand up again for ages. Just as I started on my fifth pint of Old fucking Rosie I realised I was desperate for a piss. I stood up and attempted to walk to the toilet. My head knew where I wanted to be, but my feet reacted like somecunt had wrapped cling film around my legs and pointed me in the wrong direction. The thing is, when I was in the toilets, I saw one of those notices in a poly pocket that they put on pub toilets doors. The notice that tells you that the toilet gets checked on the hour -EVERY HOUR!!. And is signed by the member of staff who checked the toilet out. Spunker's name was on this sheet 147 times (the maximum) and he doesn't even work there.

Which brings me to my vape pen. I've started using one to smoke cannabis with. It's amazing how unstoned you feel, until you are. Put it this way, I started typing this nom 2 days and 16 Battenburgs ago. 

Cunts.

You can extract cannabis oil from weed using a device called a honeybee extractor, it's a tube you fill with weed, empty a can of butane into one end and the oil comes out of the other end. And it mixes down into normal vape liquid afterwards.

if you already know this, I apologise for teaching you to suck eggs, if you didn't know, it'll save you a fortune buying the processed cannabis oil.

Edited November 22, 2018 by Eric Cuntman
Viennese whirls

[Guest judgetwi]

2 hours ago, scotty said:

This is going to go badly. 

You’re right.

I’m ‘ard northern me.

I drink pints me.

I smeerk marijeerwana me.

I’m from oop north me.

 

Wanker

[scotty]

4 hours ago, judgetwi said:

You’re right.

I’m ‘ard northern me.

I drink pints me.

I smeerk marijeerwana me.

I’m from oop north me.

 

Wanker

Northernist. 

[Witheredscrote]

7 hours ago, Ollyboro said:

A few years ago I was in a branch (not a pub) of Wetherpoons. I got the first round in, so after taking my seat , didn't need to stand up again for ages. Just as I started on my fifth pint of Old fucking Rosie I realised I was desperate for a piss. I stood up and attempted to walk to the toilet. My head knew where I wanted to be, but my feet reacted like somecunt had wrapped cling film around my legs and pointed me in the wrong direction. The thing is, when I was in the toilets, I saw one of those notices in a poly pocket that they put on pub toilets doors. The notice that tells you that the toilet gets checked on the hour -EVERY HOUR!!. And is signed by the member of staff who checked the toilet out. Spunker's name was on this sheet 147 times (the maximum) and he doesn't even work there.

Which brings me to my vape pen. I've started using one to smoke cannabis with. It's amazing how unstoned you feel, until you are. Put it this way, I started typing this nom 2 days and 16 Battenburgs ago. 

Cunts.

What the fuck is this shit, kill yourself, drink bleach etc etc.

cc: @Bubba C

[Stubby Pecker]

10 hours ago, Ollyboro said:

A few years ago I was in a branch (not a pub) of Wetherpoons. I got the first round in, so after taking my seat , didn't need to stand up again for ages. Just as I started on my fifth pint of Old fucking Rosie I realised I was desperate for a piss. I stood up and attempted to walk to the toilet. My head knew where I wanted to be, but my feet reacted like somecunt had wrapped cling film around my legs and pointed me in the wrong direction. The thing is, when I was in the toilets, I saw one of those notices in a poly pocket that they put on pub toilets doors. The notice that tells you that the toilet gets checked on the hour -EVERY HOUR!!. And is signed by the member of staff who checked the toilet out. Spunker's name was on this sheet 147 times (the maximum) and he doesn't even work there.

Which brings me to my vape pen. I've started using one to smoke cannabis with. It's amazing how unstoned you feel, until you are. Put it this way, I started typing this nom 2 days and 16 Battenburgs ago. 

Cunts.

I'm surprised a northern twat like you is still alive after 5 pints of cloudy cyder, and defiantly the reason your legs didn't want to work. On the up side, I'm sure it numbed the pain of punkers entering you roughly on every visit to the pisser.

[Penny Farthing]

14 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said:

I'm surprised a northern twat like you is still alive after 5 pints of cloudy cyder, and defiantly the reason your legs didn't want to work. On the up side, I'm sure it numbed the pain of punkers entering you roughly on every visit to the pisser.

Boring, fixated twat .. why can't you post something that is amusing?

[Witheredscrote]

35 minutes ago, Wybunbury Bertie said:

Boring, fixated twat .. why can't you post something that is amusing?

Yes Stibbly, why don't you post something amusing,  her obituary would make us all laugh.

[Penny Farthing]

2 hours ago, Witheredscrote said:

Yes Stibbly, why don't you post something amusing,  her obituary would make us all laugh.

How much do you pay your scriptwriter?

[Eric Cuntman]

26 minutes ago, Gamayun said:

How much do you pay your scriptwriter?

Why have you turned into a Macedonian human/sparrow chimera, pagan goddess? 

Are you mental?

[Penny Farthing]

1 minute ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Why have you turned into a Macedonian human/sparrow chimera, pagan goddess? 

Are you mental?

Snoop.

[Stubby Pecker]

3 hours ago, Witheredscrote said:

Yes Stibbly, why don't you post something amusing,  her obituary would make us all laugh.

"A wheelchair bound man, dressed as an old lady, in a crusty spunk-white stained anorak was crushed to death today after rolling off platform 3 at Crewe station. On lookers pissed themselves laughing, however, its not know whether the incident was an accident or fowl-play. A pony-tailed man was seen running from the scene" 

[Penny Farthing]

10 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said:

"A wheelchair bound man, dressed as an old lady, in a crusty spunk-white stained anorak was crushed to death today after rolling off platform 3 at Crewe station. On lookers pissed themselves laughing, however, its not know whether the incident was an accident or fowl-play. A pony-tailed man was seen running from the scene" 

That's the bay platform where the semi-fast to Euston starts from. What were you doing there in a wheelchair Tim? No good looking for me there. I am about 140 miles from Glawster in the opposite direction .. you been watching the IEPs?

[Stubby Pecker]

5 hours ago, Gamayun said:

That's the bay platform where the semi-fast to Euston starts from. What were you doing there in a wheelchair Tim? No good looking for me there. I am about 140 miles from Glawster in the opposite direction .. you been watching the IEPs?

Pathetic...you been watching OBEM?

 

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

20 hours ago, Ollyboro said:

A few years ago I was in a branch (not a pub) of Wetherpoons. I got the first round in, so after taking my seat , didn't need to stand up again for ages. Just as I started on my fifth pint of Old fucking Rosie I realised I was desperate for a piss. I stood up and attempted to walk to the toilet. My head knew where I wanted to be, but my feet reacted like somecunt had wrapped cling film around my legs and pointed me in the wrong direction. The thing is, when I was in the toilets, I saw one of those notices in a poly pocket that they put on pub toilets doors. The notice that tells you that the toilet gets checked on the hour -EVERY HOUR!!. And is signed by the member of staff who checked the toilet out. Spunker's name was on this sheet 147 times (the maximum) and he doesn't even work there.

Which brings me to my vape pen. I've started using one to smoke cannabis with. It's amazing how unstoned you feel, until you are. Put it this way, I started typing this nom 2 days and 16 Battenburgs ago. 

Cunts.

I thought he only signed his name on the stall partitions, after the usual "for a good time call..." written in crayon.  

[Guest Ollyboro]

On 11/23/2018 at 1:19 AM, judgetwi said:

You’re right.

I’m ‘ard northern me.

I drink pints me.

I smeerk marijeerwana me.

I’m from oop north me.

 

Wanker

First things first, Judy, I wasn't boasting about my use of marijuana,  I was merely avoiding calling the Samaritans yet again. Anyhow, let's get around to the subject of finger spaces. When I was about 5 years old I had to listen to my teacher tell me the story of The Gunpowder Plot. After listening to this story, we had to write our own version of this anti-terrorism story. I did so, and covered most of the salient points. The only criticism my infant school teacher had with my magnum opus was, I hadn't left any finger spaces between my words. That was the exact point in time when I learnt what a finger space was. But I was taught that finger spaces should occur horizontally. Your finger spaces appear to occur vertically. Is this because you're a poof?

[Guest judgetwi]

7 hours ago, Ollyboro said:

First things first, Judy, I wasn't boasting about my use of marijuana,  I was merely avoiding calling the Samaritans yet again. Anyhow, let's get around to the subject of finger spaces. When I was about 5 years old I had to listen to my teacher tell me the story of The Gunpowder Plot. After listening to this story, we had to write our own version of this anti-terrorism story. I did so, and covered most of the salient points. The only criticism my infant school teacher had with my magnum opus was, I hadn't left any finger spaces between my words. That was the exact point in time when I learnt what a finger space was. But I was taught that finger spaces should occur horizontally. Your finger spaces appear to occur vertically. Is this because you're a poof?

You need to show this to your carer.

Ok dear?

[Penny Farthing]

7 hours ago, Ollyboro said:

First things first, Judy, I wasn't boasting about my use of marijuana,  I was merely avoiding calling the Samaritans yet again. Anyhow, let's get around to the subject of finger spaces. When I was about 5 years old I had to listen to my teacher tell me the story of The Gunpowder Plot. After listening to this story, we had to write our own version of this anti-terrorism story. I did so, and covered most of the salient points. The only criticism my infant school teacher had with my magnum opus was, I hadn't left any finger spaces between my words. That was the exact point in time when I learnt what a finger space was. But I was taught that finger spaces should occur horizontally. Your finger spaces appear to occur vertically. Is this because you're a poof?

Finger spacing .. never heard of it .. did you attend a "special" ysgol?