Eric Cuntman

Do you remember the woman who was in the Guinness book of records for having the largest ovarian cyst ever to be removed? Apparently it weighed as much as the rest of her and when they examined it, it had hair, teeth and fingernails growing in it! How fucking bizarre. And revolting.

That's the cunt. Always get mixed up with him, Crippen and Christie.

Who was the acid bath murderer? He got caught eventually because despite the acid getting rid of flesh and bone, it didn't dissolve the fat, and a huge ball of human blubber was found blocking his drain. 😊 lovely.

Harry fucking Secombe, and that fucking religious shite he presented. Fat cunt should've stuck to being Milligan's stooge. Ruined Sunday evenings.

Welsh terrier.. English bull terrier.

At this point I would generally be 'escorting' you from the venue. Calm down. You've all been drinking.

Thanks. That's just fucked my afternoon bacon sarnie plan.

That's still expensive for a sanitary towel.

Apparently he was quite charismatic. And an animal lover, so not all bad. After all, it was only a few poofs that he got rid of. I'm starting to like him.

You are Brian Masters and I claim my WH Smith voucher.

You would've ended up under Dennis Nilsen's floorboards with a turnip up your arse.

Exactly. Harold must be one of those groupies for sickos. He probably wrote love letters to Jeffrey Dahmer.

She called me a peeeeedo.

Be quiet, you stupid fucking cunt.

No Gyps. I just wanna play with my ding-a-ling. @JohnnySaucePants b Goode.

It worked for Pauline Fowler.

The zoological society have ramped up their endangered species preservation agenda, so it's full time Panda-wanking for me.

Yeah. Dirty old cunt.

No, I think he genuinely is a spastic.

I think that particular old man had shoved his 'pipe bomb' into a few kids arses himself. Probably had the same tastes as Botter Boothby and creepy Longford. Fuck him. Noncey lizard cunt.

Y-fronts with skid marks. A national fucking embarrassment.

It's alright really. It's certainly not a Bugner.

I fucking hope so.

I predicted this 'mutated strain' bullshit months ago. As soon as the public start to question their draconian scheme, they invent a new threat and grant themselves 'emergency powers'. Give it a year and we'll be getting herded around at gunpoint. Well done the public... you stupid, stupid fucking cunts.

I think Ted Heath was more concerned with throwing things into the sea, rather than pulling things out of it. I wonder if he remembered to puncture the lungs and stomachs before he threw them in. You don't want that pesky gas bloat floating them back up to the surface.