Guest Gurt Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 8 hours ago, Quincy Cockfingers said: Distressing news Frank. I wholeheartedly sympathise. It used to be the blight of my life, but seems to have resolved itself. If one is caught out without antacid, one is fucked. Once, in Clerkenwell, after a sumptuous meal on St Johns road, and enough wine to kill a tibetan yak, when i retired to the Berry st penthouse late, I was so fucked i could not stop drooling in agony, spitting gallons of spit off the balcony, and eventually was forced to eat 3 snooker chalks, ground up in milk in an attempt to assuage my insides. It turns out that snooker chalk is not in fact chalk, but some awful blue industrial shit, so what I did next was spend the whole night vomiting seafood and acrid blue goo out my nostrils, crying like a baby throughout. Dont you hate it when that happens? Zantac may be prescribed. If symptoms persist you may have gastro oesophageal reflux disease. See your GP or kill yourself Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 44 minutes ago, Gurt said: Zantac may be prescribed. If symptoms persist you may have gastro oesophageal reflux disease. See your GP or kill yourself Why not google the symptoms? That's usually a good idea. Except that it's always cancer, and you're always going to die. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 1 hour ago, Frank said: St Johns Street. Idiot. Oh yes, St. John's road is the Edinburgh one. It was 14 years ago. Sorry. Why are you so grumpy tonight? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 1 hour ago, DingTheRioja said: What he really meant was "If I went anywhere near Kensington I would be shot on sight so I stay in South Acton" Shut up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 2 minutes ago, scotty said: Why not google the symptoms? That's usually a good idea. Except that it's always cancer, and you're always going to die. He's probably just got lobsterisimus bumakisimiss, or lobsters up the arsehole to lay-folk. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 50 minutes ago, Gurt said: Zantac may be prescribed. If symptoms persist you may have gastro oesophageal reflux disease. See your GP or kill yourself Losec did it for me Gurters, but your medical advice is always welcome. What would you prescribe for a pain in the arse called frank? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 3 minutes ago, Ape said: He's probably just got lobsterisimus bumakisimiss, or lobsters up the arsehole to lay-folk. Ape, what are you smoking? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 Just now, Quincy Cockfingers said: Ape, what are you smoking? They jumped ship from Jane Mansfield. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 2 minutes ago, Ape said: They jumped ship from Jane Mansfield. Did they indeed. What ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 8 minutes ago, Ape said: He's probably just got lobsterisimus bumakisimiss, or lobsters up the arsehole to lay-folk. Evening dapps, neat pete and dud reference there Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 Just now, scotty said: Evening dapps, neat pete and dud reference there Hello Scotters, glad someone understands my ramblings - been on the piss tonight ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 Today , I had the house to myself so I did a bit of breaking bad. What I did was freeze an ounce of lemon kush, freeze a litre of isopropyl alcohol, then smash the bud up in a jar with the iso for 3 minutes, then coffee filter it twice into a Pyrex rice cooker. Once I had carefully evaporated all the iso off outside away from any possible explosion source, I scraped all the shatter off the Pyrex dish, about 6.5g in all, and used half to mix a batch of e liquid, in order to get ripped on planes, office, family dos, with no cunt being the wiser. What do you think about that ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 6 minutes ago, Ape said: Hello Scotters, glad someone understands my ramblings - been on the piss tonight ? It's Saturday night mate, do you suppose for one moment that anyone on here is sober? Edit.. as quince has just so graphically demonstrated. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gurt Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 16 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said: Losec did it for me Gurters, but your medical advice is always welcome. What would you prescribe for a pain in the arse called frank? HIV needs to be treated with a range of medicines and retrovirals. I believe the Americans use a large dose of potassium chloride for lethal injections... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gurt Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 3 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said: Today , I had the house to myself so I did a bit of breaking bad. What I did was freeze an ounce of lemon kush, freeze a litre of isopropyl alcohol, then smash the bud up in a jar with the iso for 3 minutes, then coffee filter it twice into a Pyrex rice cooker. Once I had carefully evaporated all the iso off outside away from any possible explosion source, I scraped all the shatter off the Pyrex dish, about 6.5g in all, and used half to mix a batch of e liquid, in order to get ripped on planes, office, family dos, with no cunt being the wiser. What do you think about that ? Super critical gas extraction is the way forwards Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 2 minutes ago, Gurt said: Super critical gas extraction is the way forwards Co2 extraction kit costs hundreds of thousands, you mad cunt, whereas a sieve and some Iso costs 8 quid. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 3 minutes ago, Gurt said: Super critical gas extraction is the way forwards It was remarkably successful. I'm very surprised. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gurt Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 Just now, Quincy Cockfingers said: Co2 extraction kit costs hundreds of thousands, you mad cunt, whereas a sieve and some Isocosts 8 quid. A man of your caliber could A-Team something together out of the contents of your kitchen and your oven I'm sure. Anyway, someone told me that smoking banana skins gets you high Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 14 minutes ago, scotty said: It's Saturday night mate, do you suppose for one moment that anyone on here is sober? Edit.. as quince has just so graphically demonstrated. Only those who are HIV+ Eg Gurt and co ....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gurt Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 1 minute ago, Punkape said: Only those who are HIV+ Eg Gurt and co ....... Hi spunky, how did the arse rebuild go? Has the red-sock been stitched back where it belongs? lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 20 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said: Today , I had the house to myself so I did a bit of breaking bad. What I did was freeze an ounce of lemon kush, freeze a litre of isopropyl alcohol, then smash the bud up in a jar with the iso for 3 minutes, then coffee filter it twice into a Pyrex rice cooker. Once I had carefully evaporated all the iso off outside away from any possible explosion source, I scraped all the shatter off the Pyrex dish, about 6.5g in all, and used half to mix a batch of e liquid, in order to get ripped on planes, office, family dos, with no cunt being the wiser. What do you think about that ? I think you're full of arsehole. Discuss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 3 minutes ago, Gurt said: A man of your caliber could A-Team something together out of the contents of your kitchen and your oven I'm sure. Anyway, someone told me that smoking banana skins gets you high I'm happy with the above technique, it's piss easy. Once as a teenager, in Belfast myself and a mate had read that nutmeg gets one fucked up, on account of it being a mild poison. Accordingly, we acquired 500g of it and managed to ingest a horrid 2/3 of it, via the delivery vehicle of jam sandwiches. Needless to say this was grainy and revolting. We were fucked, for 2 days , and not in a good way - sweating, insane , weeping. My mum thought we had taken something hard like pcp, and we could not admit that we were a pair of sad pricks on cake mix special. Aye mum it's the angel dust , sorry, sorry. I also shat myself a little bit of liquid shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 7 minutes ago, Bubba C said: I think you're full of arsehole. Discuss. dont knock it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 49 minutes ago, scotty said: Why not google the symptoms? That's usually a good idea. Except that it's always cancer, and you're always going to die. Fingers crossed, I despise the feeble, feminine fuckwit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gurt Posted July 16, 2016 Report Share Posted July 16, 2016 11 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said: I'm happy with the above technique, it's piss easy. Once as a teenager, in Belfast myself and a mate had read that nutmeg gets one fucked up, on account of it being a mild poison. Accordingly, we acquired 500g of it and managed to ingest a horrid 2/3 of it, via the delivery vehicle of jam sandwiches. Needless to say this was grainy and revolting. We were fucked, for 2 days , and not in a good way - sweating, insane , weeping. My mum thought we had taken something hard like pcp, and we could not admit that we were a pair of sad pricks on cake mix special. Aye mum it's the angel dust , sorry, sorry. I also shat myself a little bit of liquid shit. Went picking magic mushrooms with five pals when we were 16 and got fucking thousands in a morning. Us greedy cunts had about half a sainsburys carrier bag full but none of the others would take any, fucking pussies. Being the double hard bastard that I am I made tea with them that looked like Guinness and necked 2 mugs full in quick succession thinking all would be fine and dandy. Didn't know who I was or where I was and at some point gravied my Levi's whilst rolling round the football pitch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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