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Things that make you glad that you live in the UK


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Guest Salty Piss Flap
3 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Lieutenant Frank Columbo is the only TV detective worth a shit. Always the smartest cunt in the room. I fucking love that scruffy little Peugeot driving, one eyed cunt.

I recommend The Rockford Files if you've never seen it.

Coolest detective show ever made.

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Guest Salty Piss Flap
2 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Yep, we had that, James Garner, living in a caravan with a scruffy dog and a grumpy dad.

Close description.

Trailer on Malibu Beach, no dog and the dad was only grumpy sometimes.

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4 minutes ago, Salty Piss Flap said:

Close description.

Trailer on Malibu Beach, no dog and the dad was only grumpy sometimes.

I remember he drove a Camaro, metallic gold paint job. Awful. Spray the cunt black. Now, Burt Reynolds' Trans-Am/Pontiac Firebird(same fucking thing) was a cool car.

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Guest Salty Piss Flap
1 hour ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I remember he drove a Camaro, metallic gold paint job. Awful. Spray the cunt black. Now, Burt Reynolds' Trans-Am/Pontiac Firebird(same fucking thing) was a cool car.

Rockford was supposed to be a "regular guy", so having a black Smokey and the Bandit Trans Am would've been "too cool by half". The thing about Rockford that made him cool was that he wasn't cool. Or more accurately, he wasn't trying to be cool. Didn't wear cool clothes, didn't say cool things, didn't go to cool nightclubs, etc, etc. He did his private investigator gig and went fishing with his dad or to LA Laker basketball games with his copper buddy.

It was just a well written and well produced TV show.

BTW, James Garner was a professional racing driver and did all his own driving stunts in the show.

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4 hours ago, Salty Piss Flap said:

I dunno.

According to all those British murder mysteries I watch on TV like Midsomer Murders, Father Brown & Miss Marple, to name but a few, even in the smallest little country villages the murder and mayhem rate is worse than Chicago or St Louis!!!! 😵 😱

😉

Cabot Cove has got the highest murder ratel

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Guest judgetwi
5 hours ago, Salty Piss Flap said:

I dunno.

According to all those British murder mysteries I watch on TV like Midsomer Murders, Father Brown & Miss Marple, to name but a few, even in the smallest little country villages the murder and mayhem rate is worse than Chicago or St Louis!!!! 😵 😱

😉

Jesus fucking Christ! Who are you?.......Pee-wee fucking Herman?

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6 minutes ago, scotty said:

What about that fat cunt, Frank "Loose" Cannon? 🤔

That one passed me by Scotty. I just googled it. Healthy looking cunt wasn't he? I assume chasing criminals on foot wasn't a big part of the show.

my all time favourite screen cop has to be Jackie Gleason's sheriff, 'Buford T Justice'..

"Junior, why is your gun unloaded?"

"it gets too heavy when I put bullets in it Daddy"

"Junior, there is no way you could've sprang from my loins.. and when we get home, I'm gonna punch your momma in the mouth"

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Guest Salty Piss Flap
29 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

Kojak was the coolest detective played by the coolest actor ever. 

This guy was pretty cool too....

 

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Guest Salty Piss Flap
3 minutes ago, Major Cunt said:

I might be wrong but didn't that redneck cunt appear in "Bond" with Roger Moore?

At least you're right about being wrong.

For the likes of you, that's something, I guess.

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7 minutes ago, Salty Piss Flap said:

At least you're right about being wrong.

For the likes of you, that's something, I guess.

 

Eddie's trip to the deep south didn't go to well either

I stand corrected it was sheriff J W Pepper a caricature of Buford T Justice. Don't get to big for your cowboy boots Salty. Oh and fuck off 

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10 minutes ago, Major Cunt said:

 

Eddie's trip to the deep south didn't go to well either

I stand corrected it was sheriff J W Pepper a caricature of Buford T Justice. Don't get to big for your cowboy boots Salty. Oh and fuck off 

"I know who you are boy, you're that secret agent, that English secret agent from England"

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Guest Salty Piss Flap
17 minutes ago, Major Cunt said:

I stand corrected it was sheriff J W Pepper a caricature of Buford T Justice. Don't get to big for your cowboy boots Salty. Oh and fuck off 😁

You're getting closer, but no cigar yet.

Yes, the Bond film character in question was named JW Pepper....

images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRcRNwOkFjWW5BY8B7gBi9

....but he couldn't have been a caricature of Buford T Justice, because the Bond films he was in, came out a few years before Smokey and the Bandit did.

The Bond films were from '73 and '74, while Smokey and the Bandit was from around '77.

Also FYI - Buford T Justice was played by a legendary comedian from the 50's and 60's named Jackie Gleason.

Gleason gained fame in the late 50's and early 60's playing a character named Ralph Kramden, a NYC bus driver in a show called The Honeymooners...

the-honeymooners-jackie-gleason-1955-56_

...after which he hosted his own prime time network variety show called The Jackie Gleason Show, broadcast live from Miami Beach....

DdQoAPJVQAAyR-X.jpg 

 

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Just now, Eric Cuntman said:

"I know who you are boy, you're that secret agent, that English secret agent from England"

Eric please stop whoring yourself for likes in pursuit of a leaderboard place, it's understandable and you've knocked that cunt Withers off, however totally unbecoming were gonna have to have a stewards otherwise!

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5 minutes ago, Major Cunt said:

Eric please stop whoring yourself for likes in pursuit of a leaderboard place, it's understandable and you've knocked that cunt Withers off, however totally unbecoming were gonna have to have a stewards otherwise!

I'm the fucking Julia Roberts of 'like whoring'.

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