Mike Hunt Posted January 16, 2023 Report Share Posted January 16, 2023 Fanny (Mrs Hunt) and me were planning on having a nice lunch in Hebden Bridge tomorrow, so I thought I'd go on TripAdvisor and find us the best one. Having heard one or two tales about this place I thought I'd save me some time, so I did a filtered search and input "meat-eating heterosexual restaurants" and fuck me, out of 147 restaurants I got a big fat zero. They're all save the fucking planet lezzie eateries. Don't fancy our chances in May in Brighton. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted January 16, 2023 Report Share Posted January 16, 2023 16 minutes ago, Mike Hunt said: Fanny (Mrs Hunt) and me were planning on having a nice lunch in Hebden Bridge tomorrow, so I thought I'd go on TripAdvisor and find us the best one. Having heard one or two tales about this place I thought I'd save me some time, so I did a filtered search and input "meat-eating heterosexual restaurants" and fuck me, out of 147 restaurants I got a big fat zero. They're all save the fucking planet lezzie eateries. Don't fancy our chances in May in Brighton. Had to Google Hebden Bridge as I’d never even heard of it. The first thing I saw was that it’s in West Yorkshire apparently so that was enough for me to never want to know anything more about it. Tell your missus to get her arse into the kitchen and cook something good or you’ll give her a firm backhander when you get home from the pub. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Hunt Posted January 16, 2023 Author Report Share Posted January 16, 2023 Thanks for your worldly wise words KB, but that's the whole problem, she does my pork sausage to a turn, but after 22 years I'm looking for something more spicy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted January 16, 2023 Report Share Posted January 16, 2023 28 minutes ago, Mike Hunt said: Thanks for your worldly wise words KB, but that's the whole problem, she does my pork sausage to a turn, but after 22 years I'm looking for something more spicy. Squirt her in the face with a water pistol full of Tabasco just as you’re about to come. Birds fucking love it (not the first few times obviously, but once they get used to it). 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prints Harry Posted January 17, 2023 Report Share Posted January 17, 2023 19 hours ago, Mike Hunt said: Fanny (Mrs Hunt) and me were planning on having a nice lunch in Hebden Bridge tomorrow, so I thought I'd go on TripAdvisor and find us the best one. Having heard one or two tales about this place I thought I'd save me some time, so I did a filtered search and input "meat-eating heterosexual restaurants" and fuck me, out of 147 restaurants I got a big fat zero. They're all save the fucking planet lezzie eateries. Don't fancy our chances in May in Brighton. What about Mytholmroyd? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Hunt Posted January 17, 2023 Author Report Share Posted January 17, 2023 Do they serve meat there? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prints Harry Posted January 17, 2023 Report Share Posted January 17, 2023 1 minute ago, Mike Hunt said: Do they serve meat there? Probably sausage meat. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
and Posted January 17, 2023 Report Share Posted January 17, 2023 1 hour ago, Penny Farthing said: Probably sausage meat. Wrapped in a nice rubber/PU coating, to keep it's shape. On a related subject, and it's probably been mentioned before, why do rug-munchers use dildoes for stimulation if they hate men so much, surely it's only a plasticised representation of a penis, which kinda defeats the object of being a lezzer? 🌽🥒 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Billy Posted January 17, 2023 Report Share Posted January 17, 2023 2 minutes ago, cunt said: Wrapped in a nice rubber/PU coating, to keep it's shape. On a related subject, and it's probably been mentioned before, why do rug-munchers use dildoes for stimulation if they hate men so much, surely it's only a plasticised representation of a penis, which kinda defeats the object of being a lezzer? 🌽🥒 Don’t you think he’s confused enough every time he hoists up his dress and wrestles the beast from his Y fronts at the urinal? If you’d asked him about his Velcro backed plasticised vagina that he bought on Ali Express, at least he’d know what you’re on about. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted January 17, 2023 Report Share Posted January 17, 2023 20 minutes ago, cunt said: Wrapped in a nice rubber/PU coating, to keep it's shape. On a related subject, and it's probably been mentioned before, why do rug-munchers use dildoes for stimulation if they hate men so much, surely it's only a plasticised representation of a penis, which kinda defeats the object of being a lezzer? 🌽🥒 Actual lesbians don’t look anything like the ones in the videos. I think those ones are just pretending. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
and Posted January 18, 2023 Report Share Posted January 18, 2023 21 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: the ones in the videos Which videos? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
and Posted January 18, 2023 Report Share Posted January 18, 2023 On 16/01/2023 at 22:54, Mike Hunt said: I'm looking for something more spicy. Have you tried Bratwurst, Andouille or 'Nduja? Or how about one of those sailors who just spent three months on the QM2, the ones Wolfie seems to finds so appealing?🚤 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Chap Raasclaat Posted January 18, 2023 Report Share Posted January 18, 2023 On 16/01/2023 at 22:17, Mike Hunt said: Fanny (Mrs Hunt) and me were planning on having a nice lunch in Hebden Bridge tomorrow, so I thought I'd go on TripAdvisor and find us the best one. Having heard one or two tales about this place I thought I'd save me some time, so I did a filtered search and input "meat-eating heterosexual restaurants" and fuck me, out of 147 restaurants I got a big fat zero. They're all save the fucking planet lezzie eateries. Don't fancy our chances in May in Brighton. Get down to 'Abdul's Numberrrr 1 Kazakhstan Kebab' shop in Hendon, no problems with benders or dykes there... some poof called Hugo went in half drunk and started going on about gay rights in Kazakhstan, he was never seen again. The kebabs had a slight funny taste for a while afterwards, and some cunt found what they thought was a human tooth in one, however it was lamb bone apparently. Allah u Akbar. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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