Decimus

Do you want to suck my dick, Judge?

I find that my peak of being misanthropic is usually in the early afternoon as opposed to the morning. In light of this, I think it's entirely fair to tell you to shut your fucking mouth, you dozy cunt.

I've got a vivid image of him. Jowly, fat fucking face gesticulating like an Alabama snapping turtle as he works his jaw muscles into a frenzy. Snack done, he cleans himself up with his canary yellow tie and proceeds to breathe heavily into the faces of the unfortunate denizens of his slums.

Good morning Neil, you fat cunt.

Quincy could. It's not hard to squat under someone's arse with your mouth open whilst masturbating furiously.

Eric, I can imagine you giving this speech in parliament in your capacity as the future right honourable member for Jaywick. You might be just the sort of cove who can save us from a future of feeling the lick o'the cat wielded by a race of sentient Breville toastie machines.

The Republic have got a half-breed Gandhi as taoiseach, peace is virtually guaranteed. If not, at least we can expect the first pictures in seventy years of an international leader in a nappy.

This sort of dog shit nomination is indicative of the average age of this site's contributors. Nobody under the age of 35 gives a fuck about Irish nationalist terrorism. It's dead and buried and it's main players are either legitimised or in the ground. Last Cunt Standing, were you a product of the care system from some Godawful Scottish shithole, who for want of any other discernible talent signed up to a British Army infantry regiment in the late seventies? Was the bunk mate that you spent your basic training sucking off on the Brecon Beacons shot in the head by an angry Belfast insurgent? Either way, join the 21st century, the British and Unionist cause in Ireland is dead and the island will be united within the next twenty years. Fuck off.

The problem is, the vast majority of the British populace are thick, reactionary fucking wankers. Regardless of the fact that something works 99 times out of 100, as soon as something goes wrong they adopt the Daily Mail mentality of "Questions need to be asked". To not put too fine a point on it, an example of this is that the general public ignored the multi-faceted benefits of being in the EU to vote for Brexit because a single Baltic wholesale shop appeared on the high street of their ghastly provincial town.

She's a disgusting fat cunt. The beast has been lauded for her performance as Cilla, but she should be endlessly slated as a woman in the public eye who has got the audacity to not look after herself. Vile, fat, chip-guzzling, northern slag..

He owns several rocks. Proceed with care.

I'm not sure I approve of you using my Stubby toy, Pen. The only person who is allowed to mercilessly target him and make him look like a stupid fucking cunt is me. Please stop tormenting him.

A fucking cracking nomination. I'd add to this by suggesting that anyone who purchased their council property for a ridiculously cheap price in the eighties, and then sells it at today's inflated prices, should have to give 50% of the equity back to local government in order to fund new affordable housing developments.

Can I stop you there? Thanks.

Or Nuneaton.

No.

You've obviously never seen Taxi Driver. Fuck off you old cunt and shove your "Good Old days" up your fucking arse.

A fascinating critique of Frank's cunting capabilities, rendered completely irrelevant by the fact that you're a humongous shit-stabbing poof and are thus disqualified from being a member of said clique. Please limit your opinions to your monthly column in Attitude Magazine.

Ordinarily I'd PM the clique in anticipation of a feeding frenzy following a proclamation such as this from our lord and master. However, The Wolf is out of your league. Fuck off and find us easier prey.

You've been on fucking fire recently, Drew. I make that five likes in a week I've sent your way.

I like you, Stubby.. A lot.

Tiring today, Stubbers. Some goblin type creature who absolutely fucking stinks of Forest of Dean Wild Boar cock has moved into the bottle bank in the car park and keeps inanely rambling on about old mother Earth.

It's swampy cunts like you who are responsible for the nation stumbling around in the fucking dark for five minutes waiting for energy efficient light bulbs to brighten a room. Take your maggot out of Al Gore's arsehole, douse yourself in leaded four star petrol and set yourself alight.

Cheap seats playing cunt.

If it really is Drew as I suspect, he'll nick the wine before he goes anywhere near your wallet, the drunken, groundhog cunt.