Eric Cuntman

Fuck off you stupid little fucktard.

Doctor Mengele is busy developing behaviour altering chemical compounds... sorry, I mean vaccines.

Queer cunts

The procedure is called a 'Caucasoplasty'. It's the only known method of persuading a black man to show any interest in black women.

Perhaps the reason is that the primitive cunts are four times more likely to start bouncing around and stabbing people. Just a fucking thought.

Yes, but if you know the resort owners, they'll tell you that it's a shithole. Apparently that sort of publicity is good for business. Eerrrm...

Mike Pence wouldn't be seen dead in Cape Verde. Sorry. I couldn't resist.

Do you remember the public information film that urged the elderly or otherwise unstable to use a proper step ladder to reach light bulbs, shelves etc, rather than standing on a chair? The expression on the old lady's face as she crashed through the glass front of the regency style bookcase still makes me laugh, just from memory.

Is Dave out of Chas n Dave still performing as 'Dave'?

Only one of them possibly could. I don't think it metastasises to Twiglets.

You could've left me out of it and said 'Paul & Barry Chuckle'

Your watch? Learn your fucking place before you get a watch. And that'll be a Timex®.

Well that contained more common sense than the BBCs daily updates anyway. 'Everybody stay at home, wear masks and avoid close proximity... unless you're black, Muslim or gay, then carry on doing exactly as you want (the police won't bother you), and if and when you do catch it, just blame it on racism and homophobia! Tune in tomorrow when we explain why all white people are evil. Except the women(fuck pets for negroes)'

I Eat Dogs?

Fatty is also fucked for the opposite reason.

No, I meant @King Billy. He's definitely not a guardianista. Snatch, Ding and Wiz are missing presumed dead.

Depends on context. It's either Decs, me or Billy, or looking at it another way, it's Johnny, Harold and Cillian Murphy.

Can we have the 'Judge Death' avatar reinstated please?

I simply can't agree.

'Too orangey for crows, just for me an' my daaawg.'

I loved that advert. I wonder how the animated 'Kia-Ora' ad would be received now.

Don't rule it out.

Well, no. There is no filtration of any kind and therefore it is indeed pointless. Anyone standing to the side of the wearer is exposed to the diverted airflow. Travelling around the edge of a plastic surface doesn't kill the virus as far as I'm aware.

Do you have one of those Perspex ones that's open to the atmosphere at the top, bottom and both sides, and is therefore completely pointless?

To say thank you for the poison impregnated wetsuit.