Wolfie

11 hours ago, Ape™️ said:

I’m deeply sorry. In my defence, my comment was aimed more at the mindless idiocy of the nomination itself, and its author. 

I make myself sick.
 

You've apologised to the biggest hoodwinking wanker this place is ever likely to see. A serious subject met with a magnanimous expression of regret. Pure class.

Fuck off Drew in advance, you unemployable, drunken little toad.

45 minutes ago, Penny Farthing said:

So far as I am aware @Ape™️ does not have any goats and he does seem to have apologised to @Witheredscrote who is now the best on here .. I will be having an injection in my left later. Having the injection is a cunt although the fact that it does help retain the sight in my left eye is not a cunt.

Testicle?

5 hours ago, Frank said:

 

https://ibb.co/7grHm0b

Wishing you a belated happy & Aids-free 2024, F. Mrs W kindly got me a pair of Red Wing moc toes for Crimpo, something I've wanted for a while but unsure about sizing. Anyway, not only do they make this old man feel as cool as fuck... they fit! They are however killing my feet/ankles, which, from reading reviews, is fairly common before they loosen.

As you're the footwear maestro, I'm enquiring whether you have experience of breaking a pair in? What about your BF or hubby – has either undergone the rigmarole of getting used to such a pair of metaphoric tanks? Thanks in advance wanker.

11 hours ago, southerncunt said:

A trifle abridged @Wolfie but some very basic content there. Not sure @Cuntybaws could tolerate the place, given his long standing views on shackle draggers, but we’re not all like that, obviously. I take my staffie to the off lead park every morning and most of the time end up speaking shit with a bloke from Orkney who moved out here, while my dog kicks the shit out of his golden retriever. If either of you ever find yourselves in my neck of the woods shoot me a pm. Not that it’s likely, but the offer is there.

That's a very generous offer SC – which is obviously reciprocated if ever you fancy a trip to England's West Country. We live in a work-in-progress old cottage, so a summer vacation would suit best. (We do have a woodburner!)

LCS will probably have a field day when I say this, but you've got a good life there. I took some time out from my studies and spent a little over nine months working on a farm near Sydney. The heat was a little too much at times, and the majority of my loved ones are in the UK, which is why I never jumped ship – though it was a consideration at the time. As I've said before, travel is a great antidote to feeling dispirited about one's own backyard, and I'm sure it's the same for you guys.

19 hours ago, Old Chap Raasclaat said:

He certainly is, Basil. In my time here I've witnessed him receive many a hiding and I've also given the wrong'un many a kick up bollocks as well. 

All of of this treatment (which he's brought on himself) and sniffing dog shit has clearly had a negative effect on him. The man is a total mess and flipped ages ago and is now reduced to mentioning 3-4 members in literally every post. 

You could ask the daft cunt what colour shit is and he'd find a way of having a lame dig at one of us, totally oblivious to his rejection and obsession issues. 

I ignore the cunt.

 

20 hours ago, Basil Brush said:

Good god man, you're obsessed! Have a holiday for christsake.

Basil only joined on Sunday Raas, and it seems he's already sussed the weird kike cunt out. While I'm liking the cut of your jib, Basil, for Gawd's sake get yourself an avatar! Actually, there's someone here who's something of an expert when it comes to changing avatars...

23 hours ago, Cuntybaws said:

Hey, fuck off Wolfie, can't you see I'm grooming him? I fancy diving the Great Barrier Reef and the South Pacific next year, and I'll need somewhere to stay for a few months between trips.

22 hours ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

I’m the wrong side of the continent for either of these destinations (unlike @southerncunt) and my pool house makes the local Ritz-Carlton look cheap. 

Here you go Bores. It appears you hadn't worked out that LCS resides in Perth ("Western ‘Straya"), like 99% of the rest of the puntership, which is on the Indian Ocean, so I thought this gentle little geography tutorial might come in handy while planning your trip to the Great Barrier Reef and South Pacific:

30 minutes ago, Basil Brush said:

How would you know this? Are you are stalker?

Lol. You're not too far from the truth, BB. He stalks not only me but also a couple of other punters, chiefly Decs and Raas. You'll find out soon enough, but he's got a fascination for all types of shit – especially dogshit. You've been forewarned.

2 hours ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

There’s a Cunt of an event on my horizon. As with all immigrants, celebrating the cultural traditions of your lands of origin becomes hugely important. Hence it is no surprise that the local contingent of porridge-wallah refugees from the land of heroin, rain and sectarian violence have taken over the local community hall next Thursday, intent on bedecking it with tartan and serving the assembled guests cullen skink, multi-offal with root vegetables and Bells-infused trifle. Some idiot in the full tribal dress is going to bellow Ayrshire incantations at us all then deafen us with a demented pipe rendition of Down Under by Men at Work. Then, after we are all stuffed and half cut, comes the deranged Ceilidh band with lots of twirling round and round, presumably till we vomit all over each other. 

Of course, I could refuse to go. In previous years I’ve a holiday, Covid or surgery recovery to hide behind. Not this year. My idiot but endearingly keen wife has signed us both up with a party of our Caledonian friends. She has neglected to consider the current weather over here is touching 38 degrees and jigging about in black tie is almost certain to cause issues. The food and whisky I don’t mind, and the banter is usually strong, but the dancing can get to fuck. The only saving grace is that given the following day is the Australia Day public holiday, the whole neighbourhood will stay in bed until 5pm nursing our hangovers. 

I’d be interested in any collective advice on how I can best turn up, eat and drink my fill, then fuck off before the mass embarrassment starts. Some of you must have some original excuses I can nick?

Anyway, this Cunt of a thing will ruin my mood for a full week and I’m not too proud to share my annoyance. 

Well, if I was being really pedantic, I'd suggest this is a feeble attempt to free yourself of your blatant subserviency and ass-kissing of Cuntybores. You can have a like for empathy, however, as I've been in similar situations brought about by the missus – just recently at Christmas.

But 38C, really? Hardly a metaphor for the Caledonian spirit.

23 hours ago, clit licker said:

I'd still like to face fuck the cunt after my tools been up her rectum 

Welcome, Charles Saatchi.

2 hours ago, Penny Farthing said:

You are so funny.

Probably not quite as much as the ridicule coming from your post-PE school changing room.

16 hours ago, and said:

I do believe that worked in favour of the last, and present, incumbents of the White House, I don't see why it shouldn't apply to all other vacant posts in the, wonderful, USA. 

An old pal of mine (English) married an American and now lives near Grand Rapids in Michigan, R-Soles, and she's invited us to visit. It's a big trip to organise but I would love to go – only it's around -20C in winter, so a summer holiday looks more plausible. Naturally I'm excited and I've been combing the area via Google Maps... only to discover a small city in the state called 'Gaylord', lololol. Surely a move from Golders Green beckons...

On 14/01/2024 at 16:52, and said:

Fudge tunnellers.

On 14/01/2024 at 16:41, and said:

Queers, shirt-lifters, uphill gardeners, rent boys, footballers, faggots, friends of Dorothy, pillow biters, Guardian readers etc.

On 13/01/2024 at 18:27, and said:

Or well gay.

On 13/01/2024 at 16:00, and said:

It's easy if you try, just suck on a big cock when you're driving, like you do when you're at home.

You can thank me later.

14 minutes ago, entitled little cunt said:

Then take her up the wrong'un

In principle, yes. But just imagine her on all-fours in front of you, when she turns around and her father's face suddenly appears.

On 24/12/2023 at 17:16, ChildeHarold said:

Yeah she's a fucking cow. I still can't forget that debacle over fucking cocaine sniffing out of it behaviour in the Chelsea apartment, ratted out by her live in Filipino housemaids who clearly fucking hated her guts over the way they were treated. Her defence:

1. They were stealing from me that's why I sacked them - the devious counter suing argument only there to deflect guilt

2. I have a personal addiction problem, I confess, I'm getting help, please forgive me (i.e. the BBC TV career) blah b l ah blah we've heard so many times before... While her oily cunt of a two faced dad Lord Cunt Lawson was fucking driving round London bookshops buying up copies of his own slimming cookery book to get it into The Times Best Seller List. 

Both a pair of cunts. As for her marriage to the AD millionaire and online art gallery guy whose name I fucking forget because of the plastic fake world he spent his life creating, that fucking fell apart into a thousand acrimonious pieces.* 

The Sunday pictorials had to wait for Megan to see that type of white hot scandal again. 

Yet the fucking slag still lives on TV thanks to good old Beeb. Who gives a fucking toss about her white powder tips. A fucking disgrace from top to bottom. 

*Saatchi

Actually H, as much as I dislike the fake, plump, privileged kike cow, and while my days of hedonism are long behind me, I can think of worse things than spending an evening with Nigella in her Chelsea apartment, accompanied by a wrap of quality candy and several bottles of claret.

On 12/01/2024 at 18:46, camberwell gypsy said:

Fucking hell. What's your problem? I've never piled into you. If you've got a problem with Pen that's your fucking concern not mine. Don't slag me off because I have the audacity to like the post. And no, I'm not licking her dick. I'll leave that to you to do, you fucking spastic poof.

@Dyslexic cnut's right Gyps. While the subject at hand may be worthy of a public shoeing, a one-sentence (and a weak one at that) nom does not make good cunting – far from it. A worthy topic is something which is original, creative etc. and not slothfully cut & pasted from the BBC website's front fucking page. We all have immediate access to precisely the same story, which in no way adds value to the 'topic' that Willy Warmer was attempting to submit. Don't take this personally, but advocating Pen's nom by claiming "great cunting" brings nothing to the site by encouraging one of the least effective and idiotic punters this shithole has ever suffered. Seriously, how many likes did it attract? Like I said: lazy, useless, pointless.

18 minutes ago, Penny Farthing said:

The skin suits that Wolfie's missus makes for him don't protect him from his own very thin skin.

Ask nicely and she may even knit you a willy warmer, Pen. It may take a while, but weeks could be saved with colder weather in mind.

7 minutes ago, Cunty BigBollox said:

That fucking pot must be constructed from dark matter - black isn't black enough for you, of all people, to throw critique like that about. You thick, useless, irrelevant wanker.

It's a bird... it's a plane... it's... Ciderman!

How about an apple-themed Spiderman-type superhero costume Drew? The missus is pretty good at sewing and earns a little extra as a seamstress. Ping me the address of your grotty little flat and I'm sure we can get something sorted. Lololol.

48 minutes ago, Witheredscrote said:

@Wolfie, I was number 4 on the list, and I can honestly say I haven't upped my game, and I am still waiting for my curtains (Green regency stripe for my study). 

...and still no.1 for creating another account to award himself/manipulate likes. You wanker, lol.

5 minutes ago, Penny Farthing said:

Who's dick are you licking .. oh .. he's just liked your post!

In bold, below:

On 18/12/2019 at 01:08, Admin said:

I generally live and let live on these pages. However, I have had my fill of certain people and practices. The site needs to continue, but it will be on an irreversible decline if the current situation is allowed to continue.

1) Frank. You are not capable of producing any content other than repeated insults. I asked you to put a nom up, you had time, but you failed. It's over.

2) Lady P. Continual mind numbing nominations and pointless content. Less is more. Your longevity does not afford you any privileges. Change or the exit will be shown.

3) Decimus. Stop continually looking for arguments or people to destroy. Stick to what you are very good at, good old fashioned cunting.

4) Withers. I don't see you offering much beyond insults and bickering. Up your game or it's curtains.

5) Salty. I don't think you have done much wrong nor much right either. I am not sure this is the right place for you. Time to leave.

For those who come here to do what it says on the tin, I thank you for keeping the faith.

 

15 hours ago, Cunty BigBollox said:

Wind your fucking hirsute neck in and contribute to the subject matter rather than attempting to be Ape MkII and attack other posters without offering any contribution or value to the site. Have a fucking day off.

I think others' response to this means there's not much for me to do. Remember the 7.30 rule, idiot.

12 hours ago, Greg said:

I'm not sure about the whole Epstein fandango. There are 150+ claimants on his estate all claiming they were abused multiple times by well known punters. Many of the claimants have stated they knew it was all video'd. But there's no tapes. All of Jeffrey's employees have said they never saw orgies. Only Ghislaine went down. It doesn't add up. 

'Only Ghislaine went down'. How so?

In spite of being a natural on the subject, check your facts. Epstein also went down in spectacular fashion, found hanged (or hung) in his prison cell. The Duke of Pork also went down, compelled to pay millions to Giuffre (and others to keep them quiet) and forced to step down from public duty, losing his previous royal title, privileges and status. While the latter went down lightly, Maxwell wasn't the only one. Hopefully there are more to come.

Oh – and a fitting avatar, btw.

6 hours ago, Penny Farthing said:

I have just watched this cunt giving evidence .. he comes across as inept and not too bright, and say's that he was not technically minded.

 

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/live/uk-politics-67941754

 

Yet another original, well-researched, non-BBC mainstream media news link topic which the rest of us might struggle to find.

You pointless, lazy, useless fucking tranny cunt.

13 hours ago, entitled little cunt said:

Typical thick British public who perpetually view life as some david and goliath struggle .Branson , a dirty little perv , a cunt of huge proportions , a cunt who from his private island demanded and recieved millions in taxpayers money as a handouts to keep his shit businesses in business  is seen as some anti establishment folk hero .He's a CUNT .Now every post-office prosecution was of of course a miscarriage of justice .Not one of them had their fingers in the till .Bollox .It stands  to reason a proportion did  because there  is an immoral element in every walk of life .A post office overcharged me hundreds of pounds for  business postage,  I found out after speaking to another post office who informed me I wasn't the only person who had fallen foul of them .I didn't think it possible but it happened .Once again its  manipulated into a David and goliath story ,  something the British are suckers for  everytime . Any form of reason goes out of the window .A old prison saying , the first thing you learn , everyone is innocent .

Indeed. To have demanded a £500m bailout from people struggling to make ends meet (mostly because of the unecessary strain placed upon them by a coronavirus-obsessed government), while his personal wealth is worth more than £4bn, which includes an island estimated to be valued at around £100m, is beyond fucking greedy. I hope the self-indulgent cunt gets eaten by a ravenous shark.  

4 minutes ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

Readers will be aware that this effluent is a great example of a contributor who reports he is definitely letting things wash over his head, and generally conducting himself in a Zen-like manner more usually seen in orange-clad men dotted about on a Tibetan hillside (and no, I don’t mean @King Billy on his holidays). Any suggestion that this timid invective is actually the work of the Corner’s Ronnie Pickering, charging about the place in his metaphorical Citroen Picasso, picking fights every few hours with anyone he takes a dislike to, is of course wide of the mark. These are most definitely the calm and considered writings of a man truly at ease with how life has turned out for him, rather than the ill-tempered discharge of a middle-aged Cuck who thinks a hour pounding the heavy bag in the garage every morning will keep him hung, virile and relevant. 

I don’t know who I feel sorry for the most; the dogs or the teenagers. 

And……..breathe……

Oh no, another lexical error in bold! Tsk-tsk.

This is precisely the kind of shit you've been doing for the past couple of months. Readers will be aware of exactly what I'm talking about.

Pitiful, Doc, isn't it?

1 hour ago, Last Cunt Standing said:

If this is you letting things wash over your head (isn’t it wash over you or go over your head ?), I’d be interested to see what happens when something or someone really gets to you. You already give the impression of a scarlet hypertensive, boiling with impotent rage that you keep getting your arse handed to you by anyone who wouldn’t be taxed by the quick crossword in the Daily Star. You do know that one day all this rampaging cortisol is going to come back and bite you, don’t you?

I’d invest in a hammock and a good pair of noise cancelling headphones if I were you. Works for me on a glorious January day. As for the wretched state of the UK, it is quite interesting to me how little the ex-pat community here in WA have to say on the subject these days, just a shrug and a rueful shake of the head whenever they are asked for commment (sic). 

Incidentally, is skinny-fingered an insult where you come from? The last time I heard such a toothless barb, I was visiting a care home during the afternoon bingo. You fucking old woman. 

There you go again: you've highlighted in bold one extra 'm' in 'commment' – which means you've also just flawlessly executed the precise point I was making about you here:

On 16/12/2023 at 19:57, Wolfie said:

Clearly too stupid to have created this nom in the Open Corner for obvious reasons, which is why Roops appears to have done it for you, the only discernable weapon in your somewhat limited arsenal is to point out minor spelling errors borne from a half-pint keypad without spellcheck. And that's it. As usual you've nothing else to offer.

Content is key, which perhaps goes some way to explaining just why your average post-like ratio is something of an embarrassment – from your perspective (lol). There's nothing else in your cache, aside from the most mind-numbingly boring, clearly unnatural and inhibited prose which looks as though it takes hours to compose.

Are you quite sure you're a doctor, Doc, especially as most typically carry appalling grammar, spontaneity, and lack of attention to detail in this respect?

You utterly fake cockweasel. 

Perhaps next time, like you, I'll be less spontaneous and fastidiously run everything through spellcheck, so as to not provide you with the only bit of ammo you've seemingly got left. My post above sums you up rather well, don't you think, you incredibly boring, one-dimensional wanker?

On 09/01/2024 at 20:48, ChildeHarold said:

I like that last sentence, very Shakespearean, very quotable. All those cunts are within a half days flying time in a private plane or copter of each other for partying. I wonder what the rights are when you buy a "private" island in terms of the seas surrounding it, in effect keeping people out. Surely you don't own a five mile zone round the island? That's how the Crown initially colonised these areas by issuing land grants and titles which are still legally recognised today. That's why the fucking Jewish capitalists and mobsters of America and British aristocracy who still control Britain fucking hated the balls off Castro and the Cubans. They broke the mould, like the Iranians: unforgiveable. 

Stick to the topic Harold. Speaking of the Crown and British aristocracy at its highest echelon, Branson is far less traceable than, say, Prince Andrew. The latter is far more stupid. For example, Andrew claimed to never have met Virginia Giuffre during his car-crash interview with Emily Maitlis – even though a photo of him with his arm around her, with Ghislaine Maxwell in the background, was in the public domain. Doh. He then paid tens of millions to settle a civil sexual assault case with her (if ever there was an admission of guilt!), forcing him to step down from public duties after the furore.

While there's no proof, Branson strikes me as far more cunning and calculating. If there is a sex tape which exists, you can bet he's shitting his load. A sadistic part of me hopes it surfaces – much like his body might in his swimming pool if ever it gets into the wrong (or right) hands.