Guest deebom Posted June 3, 2015 Report Share Posted June 3, 2015 So I recently bought new laptop, a Lenovo. It's nice, very thin, large screen, a fuckload of RAM, hooge HD ect. But I had to spend an hour removing shite from it. McAffee anti virus bollocks, which wouldn't know a virus if it found one, which it doesn't. Some shit called Superfish who's sole purpose seemed to be slowing the boot process. Power DVD, of course not the full version but the povo one that pops up a box saying you have the shit version but can have the good version for £25. Cyberlink Power Director? Lenovo wireless, Lenovo webstart whatever the fuck that does. Lenovo updates to update the bloat. One key recovery, for people too fucking stupid to do a system restore should things go pear shaped on a brand new computer. And a whole load of other shit that seems to do stuff that Windows already does.Why?I would just wipe the lot and reinstall Windows, but we don't get Windows discs anymore do we? Fucking cunts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted June 3, 2015 Report Share Posted June 3, 2015 At first glance, I misread the title as "Bloatwear" and instantly assumed it was a nom concerning Keith's soiled XXXXL tracksuits. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JackoTC Posted June 3, 2015 Report Share Posted June 3, 2015 All technology is the same Bomba. It took me about a week to clear all the shit from my laptop. As for my Iphone, well fuck my old boots, the cunt has about 20 app icons on there that you cannot remove. Buying the gear is not enough. They want to pester you and fuck you off enough to squeeze another few quid out of you. The fucking big bastards. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted June 3, 2015 Report Share Posted June 3, 2015 How else are the inscrutable Chinese cunts supposed to track the Pornhub favourites of the imperialist running dogs of the West? The sex toy catalogues will start to arrive shortly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted June 3, 2015 Report Share Posted June 3, 2015 When my laptop goes wrong I take it to a dishy Austrian called Wolfgang who sorts it out. He can finger my USB anytime. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted June 3, 2015 Report Share Posted June 3, 2015 When my laptop goes wrong I take it to a dishy Austrian called Wolfgang who sorts it out. He can finger my USB anytime.Ask to see his 3.5" floppy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted June 4, 2015 Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 I have since discovered that if you have a legitimate copy of Win 8.1 with key, you can download another copy from Microflop. New installation here I come. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted June 4, 2015 Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 Fuck off you nerd. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jiggerycock Posted June 4, 2015 Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 Got this too.What in the name of screaming buggery fuck is 'Zinio'? 'newsXpresso' anyone? 'Cha Cha', even?Probably FBI psy ops mindgames software, that let's the world know you're a kiddy fiddler if you so much as think about stepping out of line.I'm not paranoid - although I know you all think I am. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted June 4, 2015 Report Share Posted June 4, 2015 I have since discovered that if you have a legitimate copy of Win 8.1 with key, you can download another copy from Microflop. New installation here I come.Apparently there should be Windows 10 coming out at the end of July.Which will probably be Windows 8.1 with different name. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted June 6, 2015 Report Share Posted June 6, 2015 And I have also discovered that I cant install the copy of Windows because it wont recognise my legitimate product key. It tells me to contact Lenovo. Some further Googling also tells me that I cant actually install any other version of windows, because the product key for this one is embedded in to the fucking BIOS.So there we go. A computer that I have bought and paid for, which is mine, but I cant actually run it the way I want to. I think I'll send the fucking thing back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted June 6, 2015 Report Share Posted June 6, 2015 I have since discovered that if you have a legitimate copy of Win 8.1 with key, you can download another copy from Microflop. New installation here I come.Yep, you can download any single version from M$ Digital River (wot a fooking name...)When my laptop goes wrong I take it to a dishy Austrian called Wolfgang who sorts it out. He can finger my USB anytime.Ask to see his 3.5" floppy.Mines' a 5.25".... used to have a 9" once upon a time... And I have also discovered that I cant install the copy of Windows because it wont recognise my legitimate product key. It tells me to contact Lenovo. Some further Googling also tells me that I cant actually install any other version of windows, because the product key for this one is embedded in to the fucking BIOS.So there we go. A computer that I have bought and paid for, which is mine, but I cant actually run it the way I want to. I think I'll send the fucking thing back.There are, ahem, ways to solve that... and they are not strictly illegal either.. if your key says "Windows 8.1 64-bit Home Edition" then you can install it yourself...All payments for assistence made out to Cheif Akabus' Spiritual Healing, or "CASH" for short.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted June 6, 2015 Report Share Posted June 6, 2015 And I have also discovered that I cant install the copy of Windows because it wont recognise my legitimate product key. It tells me to contact Lenovo. Some further Googling also tells me that I cant actually install any other version of windows, because the product key for this one is embedded in to the fucking BIOS.So there we go. A computer that I have bought and paid for, which is mine, but I cant actually run it the way I want to. I think I'll send the fucking thing back.Find "PC Info" and there should be your Product ID. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted June 7, 2015 Report Share Posted June 7, 2015 The upgrade finds the key itself and checks it. Doesn't like it, I'll ring Lenovo tommorra. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DrCunt Posted June 7, 2015 Report Share Posted June 7, 2015 Jacamo sell Bloatwear don't they? I believe that Judge gets the catalogue delivered if you're interested. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted June 7, 2015 Report Share Posted June 7, 2015 The upgrade finds the key itself and checks it. Doesn't like it, I'll ring Lenovo tommorra. I'm not talking about "upgrade", just download the full Windows 8.1 Installer and start from scratch, as though you have a new hard drive.As a legitimate Windows license owner, you have the right to download the full Installer from M$, it's on there...http://windows.microsoft.com/en-US/windows-8/upgrade-product-key-only Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted June 7, 2015 Report Share Posted June 7, 2015 I'm not talking about "upgrade", just download the full Windows 8.1 Installer and start from scratch, as though you have a new hard drive.As a legitimate Windows license owner, you have the right to download the full Installer from M$, it's on there...http://windows.microsoft.com/en-US/windows-8/upgrade-product-key-onlyI have it on a USB stick, but it asks for a product key. As there is no product key sticker on the bottom of new laptops it checks the product key embedded into the BIOS, checks to see if it's real then if it is, it carries on with the installation.My problem is the shit version of Windows Lenovo gave me (Windows 8.1 with Bing 64bit.) This version is free to manufacturers, no license fee to pay, they can install it on all of their budget laptops but when it comes to reinstalling, Windows doesn't recognise the key. The manufacturers will apparently give you a recognisable key if you ask nicely. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted June 7, 2015 Report Share Posted June 7, 2015 I have it on a USB stick, but it asks for a product key. As there is no product key sticker on the bottom of new laptops it checks the product key embedded into the BIOS, checks to see if it's real then if it is, it carries on with the installation.My problem is the shit version of Windows Lenovo gave me (Windows 8.1 with Bing 64bit.) This version is free to manufacturers, no license fee to pay, they can install it on all of their budget laptops but when it comes to reinstalling, Windows doesn't recognise the key. The manufacturers will apparently give you a recognisable key if you ask nicely.well, ask them nicely, then call them cunts and threaten them if the nicey nicey doesnt work...when you go to the PC System page, do you not get the key there? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted June 9, 2015 Report Share Posted June 9, 2015 Yeah I have the key. Windows doesn't recognise it. It wont recognise any key from that version of windows. Doesn't matter now, I nuked the drive and installed Win 8.1 pro that I got... Somewhere. Only thing is it wont boot in UEFI now, but works when I select legacy drivers. Seems a little slower to boot though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lady Penelope Posted June 9, 2015 Report Share Posted June 9, 2015 Bloatware is no joke .. I have spent the last four months recoverig from major surgery and I am now bloated Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted June 10, 2015 Report Share Posted June 10, 2015 Yeah I have the key. Windows doesn't recognise it. It wont recognise any key from that version of windows. Doesn't matter now, I nuked the drive and installed Win 8.1 pro that I got... Somewhere. Only thing is it wont boot in UEFI now, but works when I select legacy drivers. Seems a little slower to boot though.Ah... If I remember correctly, it's the Bing shite that fuck it up, my tablet is pure 8.1, no bloat and no fucking bing... thank god... Not sure why UEFI wouldnt work, it's before windows kicks in... I presume you tried to the old "reset to defaults"..? but make sure you photograph the settings all over in case you need to set them back... or the factory "stick a needle into a plugged in electronic device of course its fucking safe" reset..? Sometimes cures boot issues for no fucking reason at all... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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