Decimus Posted December 5, 2015 Report Share Posted December 5, 2015 I'm at one and I don't care to elaborate. Johnny Mathis is a cunt. Fuck off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted December 5, 2015 Report Share Posted December 5, 2015 5 minutes ago, Decimus said: I'm at one and I don't care to elaborate. Johnny Mathis is a cunt. Fuck off. Evening Decimus. What you up to tonight, anything nice? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted December 6, 2015 Report Share Posted December 6, 2015 3 hours ago, Decimus said: I'm at one and I don't care to elaborate. Johnny Mathis is a cunt. Fuck off. How did you allow yourself to get dragged into such a splendid example of fuckwittery as a Christmas party? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted December 6, 2015 Report Share Posted December 6, 2015 It over with for another year Decs. Any bottling carried out? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted December 6, 2015 Report Share Posted December 6, 2015 3 minutes ago, Snatch said: It over with for another year Decs. Any bottling carried out? more like "any bottles to carry out..." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted December 6, 2015 Author Report Share Posted December 6, 2015 There was a bit of a punch up actually, sadly no bottling though. Worst fight I've ever seen, the couple of poofs flailed about for a couple of seconds, grappling like a love sick couple, and then it was broken up. By a woman. They ought to be fucking ashamed of themselves. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eddie Posted December 6, 2015 Report Share Posted December 6, 2015 Just now, Decimus said: There was a bit of a punch up actually, sadly no bottling though. Worst fight I've ever seen, the couple of poofs flailed about for a couple of seconds, grappling like love sick couple, and then it was broken up. By a woman. They ought to be fucking ashamed of themselves. Well you shouldn't have invited frank and jacko, you know they can't handle their drink. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted December 6, 2015 Author Report Share Posted December 6, 2015 2 minutes ago, Eddie said: Well you shouldn't have invited frank and jacko, you know they can't handle their drink. Very true, Edders, sage advice as ever. It all kicked off over who was next in line for the glory hole. Judge was performing yesterday evening, and he's popular with the lads, he can suck the lid off of a stubborn jar of pickled walnuts 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted December 6, 2015 Report Share Posted December 6, 2015 1 minute ago, Decimus said: Very true, Edders, sage advice as ever. It all kicked off over who was next in line for the glory hole. Judge was performing yesterday evening, and he's popular with the lads, he can suck the lid off of a stubborn jar of pickled walnuts Talking of the overrated cock muncher,where is he Decs,still chained up in the cubicle? Normally he comes on Saturday night after a couple of pina coladas and a shuffle from Stavros to spout his normal "I'm holier than thou,you racist" utter bollocks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Drew P Pissflaps Posted December 6, 2015 Report Share Posted December 6, 2015 You sad cunt. On account of a new member of staff we're not having a Christmas party this year, we are going to have an annual celebration. Let's just say it's going to be Jo! Ho! rather than Ho! Ho! Ho! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jiggerycock Posted December 6, 2015 Report Share Posted December 6, 2015 It's one godawful clichéd shitstorm isn't it? Has management sprung for a free bar? That's the only saving grace at these things. You can experiment with all kind of random shit - Advocaat (that's always a winner), Bombay Sapphire. Kaluha and Medori. Go on! Knock yourself out, only I hope you're an introspective and quiet drunk and not going to lead all the single, menopausal 'cat women' in a Bacchanalian chorus of 'I Will Survive' on the karaoke, before you all go home and sob yourselves to sleep in your suburban bedsits. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted December 7, 2015 Report Share Posted December 7, 2015 21 hours ago, Decimus said: There was a bit of a punch up actually, sadly no bottling though. Worst fight I've ever seen, the couple of poofs flailed about for a couple of seconds, grappling like a love sick couple, and then it was broken up. By a woman. They ought to be fucking ashamed of themselves. Tsssk. I'd have broken her fucking nose with a honest-to-God head butt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted December 7, 2015 Author Report Share Posted December 7, 2015 Just now, Snatch said: Talking of the overrated cock muncher,where is he Decs,still chained up in the cubicle? Normally he comes on Saturday night after a couple of pina coladas and a shuffle from Stavros to post his normal "I'm holier than thou,you racist" utter bollocks. He's having reconstructive surgery on his arsehole so will be offline for a while. It's a tough life being a raving bender, but he can put up with the constant anal fissures because he's a salt o' the earth, 'ard as fackin' nails, knees up muvver brown singing geeeeeezer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted December 7, 2015 Report Share Posted December 7, 2015 1 hour ago, Decimus said: He's having reconstructive surgery on his arsehole so will be offline for a while. It's a tough life being a raving bender, but he can put up with the constant anal fissures because he's a salt o' the earth, 'ard as fackin' nails, knees up muvver brown singing geeeeeezer. He sounds a bit "cock-on-knees" to me... TAXI...!!!!!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted December 7, 2015 Report Share Posted December 7, 2015 I wouldn't go to one even if I was ever invited to one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted December 7, 2015 Report Share Posted December 7, 2015 1 hour ago, Manky said: I wouldn't go to one even if I was ever invited to one. I think you're safe. It speaks volumes that even as an infant, you weren't invited or welcome. It must be hereditary. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted December 7, 2015 Report Share Posted December 7, 2015 All them puffs eating quiche and sipping Chateau Arsebandit while listening to Adele singing depressing Christmas favourites. Total fucking purgatory. When they start doing proper Bitter and a shipping order of pudding and chips from the local traditional chippy and listening to The Macc Lads, then I will think about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted December 7, 2015 Report Share Posted December 7, 2015 12 minutes ago, Manky said: All them puffs eating quiche and sipping Chateau Arsebandit while listening to Adele singing depressing Christmas favourites. Total fucking purgatory. When they start doing proper Bitter and a shipping order of pudding and chips from the local traditional chippy and listening to The Macc Lads, then I will think about it. There is hope for the world yet!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted December 7, 2015 Report Share Posted December 7, 2015 53 minutes ago, Manky said: All them puffs eating quiche and sipping Chateau Arsebandit while listening to Adele singing depressing Christmas favourites. Total fucking purgatory. When they start doing proper Bitter and a shipping order of pudding and chips from the local traditional chippy and listening to The Macc Lads, then I will think about it. A few notes... Quich is bacon and egg pie Chateau Arsebandit can sometimes be quite nice... to clense the palate of bacon end egg pie ready for the pie and chips Anyone putting Adele on the radiogram will be castrated The recording of said castration will be used for next years Carol Concert Bitter, not yet, but I soon will be... Oh.. ok then, pint o Black Sheep or Theakston Best if that's what you meant... Pie, not pudding I hope she does bang like the shithouse door..... used to quite fancy a lass called Julie the Schoolie... all blonde, curves and giggles... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted December 9, 2015 Report Share Posted December 9, 2015 Got to go to one of these wreched parties now.... .....rather stay in and arse about drinking cider and watching telly. It's going to be full of work cunts and guess what conversation is going to be about. Fucking bag of white. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eddie Posted December 9, 2015 Report Share Posted December 9, 2015 11 minutes ago, luke swarm said: Got to go to one of these wreched parties now.... .....rather stay in and arse about drinking cider and watching telly. It's going to be full of work cunts and guess what conversation is going to be about. Fucking bag of white. Thanks for sharing....zzzzz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted December 9, 2015 Report Share Posted December 9, 2015 I have one on Thursday. Because the company I work for has more money than most countries, their parties are impressive. Last years was at some swanky London hotel, with some fella called Tiny Temper providing muzac. Plus it's packed to the fucking rafters with fit, well paid wimminz. I'll report back on Friday. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eddie Posted December 9, 2015 Report Share Posted December 9, 2015 2 minutes ago, deebom said: I have one on Thursday. Because the company I work for has more money than most countries, their parties are impressive. Last years was at some swanky London hotel, with some fella called Tiny Temper providing muzac. Plus it's packeed to the fucking rafters with fit, well paid wimminz. I'll report back on Friday. Be careful on that bike going home, click your dynamo on for safety. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted December 9, 2015 Report Share Posted December 9, 2015 7 minutes ago, deebom said: I have one on Thursday. Because the company I work for has more money than most countries, their parties are impressive. Last years was at some swanky London hotel, with some fella called Tiny Temper providing muzac. Plus it's packed to the fucking rafters with fit, well paid wimminz. I'll report back on Friday. Hope you break your legs on the dance floor you smug cunt Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted December 9, 2015 Report Share Posted December 9, 2015 Free bar too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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