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Highway Code Flaunting Cyclist Scum


Ape™️

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1 hour ago, Manky said:

Maybe.

Heart:  Big and strong through exercise and fresh air.

Brain:   Healthy through exercise and fresh air.

Kidneys: Excellent through exercise and fresh air.

Liver: Shit that useless fucker out years ago.

Any recipient will be able to bask in the warm glow of knowing that at least part of him/her was once a planet saving, eco-friendly cycle Ninja who fought a relentless battle against evil car drivers and their evil, selfish, polluting arse bandit lifestyle.

Quite true Mankers. I only added my original jarring two worder  having recollected a conversation between a surgeon and an A&E consultant in 1979.

Surgeon...... Urology are crying out for kidneys.

A&E consultant ......... They won't have to wait long, it's raining . The DOA cyclists will inevitably follow.

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21 minutes ago, MikeD said:

I have to admit, even being a cyclist myself, that a lot of them do themselves no fucking favours.

Cycling on pavements should incur an instant fucking hanging from the nearest lamp post and the cunts who jump red lights should be fucking run over.

I used to be a keen cyclist and even have my bike in the shed still. I haven't used it in 20 years.

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Guest Alfie Noakes
33 minutes ago, Decimus said:

You mean to tell me, Alf, that you live in Brighton and you only know one person with a sore arse?

I don't live in Brighton, a bit to the west, but not Worthing (where the old go to die). Most of the poofs I have met seem to have shares in ky jelly.

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50 minutes ago, cuntspotter said:

Quite true Mankers. I only added my original jarring two worder  having recollected a conversation between a surgeon and an A&E consultant in 1979.

Surgeon...... Urology are crying out for kidneys.

A&E consultant ......... They won't have to wait long, it's raining . The DOA cyclists will inevitably follow.

True story spotts; I carry a donor card on which is inscribed in black marker "I wouldn't bother with the liver".

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1 hour ago, MikeD said:

I have to admit, even being a cyclist myself, that a lot of them do themselves no fucking favours.

Cycling on pavements should incur an instant fucking hanging from the nearest lamp post and the cunts who jump red lights should be fucking run over.

Anybody cycling at speed over a zebra crossing should immediately forfeit their right not to be mown down by the nearest motor vehicle. 

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I only use a mile long footpath through a post industrial apacolyptic landscape at 10 pm. Never seen a pedestrian on it for over 5 years. How about cars parking on footpaths?

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Thinking it would be a healthy habit to get into I once cycled into work in central London. Once. I sold the bike to someone in the office there and then and took the tube home that night.

That was 30 years ago and I've never been on a bike since.

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3 hours ago, Manky said:

Morning cunts. Cycle to work time. I feel good today, saving the planet.

Kit check.  Keys car scratching. 1 bunch. Got. Boots, hobnail. Car denting. Got  Blinkers, rule ignoring. Got. Kit complete.

Coffin to (hopefully) place your mangled corpse in as a result of the third item on your cuntish list. Check.

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3 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said:

Thinking it would be a healthy habit to get into I once cycled into work in central London. Once. I sold the bike to someone in the office there and then and took the tube home that night.

That was 30 years ago and I've never been on a bike since.

Just as well. I wouldn't fancy cycling there now, you'd be better just shooting yourself and get it over with quickly.

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5 minutes ago, MikeD said:

Just as well. I wouldn't fancy cycling there now, you'd be better just shooting yourself and get it over with quickly.

Cunts come back from Helmand Province and tell you they've got PTSD, but they don't know the fucking half of it!

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1 hour ago, Cuntybaws said:

Cunts come back from Helmand Province and tell you they've got PTSD, but they don't know the fucking half of it!

'You don't know man, you weren't there!!'

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