Ape™️ Posted January 22, 2016 Report Share Posted January 22, 2016 This subject has been covered before no doubt but fuck it, these idiots deserve a re-cunt. Cyclists are always bleating on about how badly they are treated on the roads by motorists, but yet still feel it's acceptable, indeed almost their right, to completely ignore the rules of the road that the motoring public are expected to obey. A red light at a junction, to a motorist, means stop, yet to cyclists it seems to mean "fuck it, just go anyway". One way or no entry sign? Fuck it, just go anyway. Footpaths? Town centres? Public spaces? Not a problem when you're a cyclist, as the rules of the road just don't apply. Consequently, when these lane weaving, curb jumping cunts get mown down by an innocent motorist it serves them fucking right - hopefully they'll be maimed for life or killed. Fucking cunts the lot of them. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted January 22, 2016 Report Share Posted January 22, 2016 Somewhere, in a windowless hovel on a disgusting northern sink estate, surrounded by whippet faeces and the blood of his battered wife, Manky is shaking with rage. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted January 22, 2016 Report Share Posted January 22, 2016 11 minutes ago, Decimus said: Somewhere, in a windowless hovel on a disgusting northern sink estate, surrounded by whippet faeces and the blood of his battered wife, Manky is shaking with rage. why do you say that Decs....does Manky ride a bike.......for the life of me, I cannot recall him saying this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted January 22, 2016 Report Share Posted January 22, 2016 No I don't think I noticed that manky had said he owned a bike. Gong farmer did, wherever he has been hiding recently. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted January 22, 2016 Author Report Share Posted January 22, 2016 Oh no, I'd forgotten that Manky rides a bike. I really hope he doesn't take exception to this - that would be terrible and I'd feel awful. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted January 22, 2016 Report Share Posted January 22, 2016 I ride a bike. Yesterday I mowed down a bus shelter full of kittens, it's my right as a cyclist. I have the backing of Boris. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted January 22, 2016 Report Share Posted January 22, 2016 I purposely give the cunts as shallow berth as possible. Especially when there is an annoyance (collective term) of the stupid wankers that refuse to ride in single file. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted January 22, 2016 Report Share Posted January 22, 2016 We innocent drivers are actually expected to share the roads with these up their own arse wankers, it's ludicrous. They have a wider field of vision, and can maneuver more quickly when they see a car hurtling at them at greatly increased rates beyond the posted limit. If they choose to put the earbuds in, and ignore their surroundings, expect every other cunt to mind their well-being, they are due for a detour to the A&E or the morticians table. Arrogant cunts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted January 22, 2016 Report Share Posted January 22, 2016 I have a bike and all motorists are cunts with cyclecide in their hearts. Real highway code. 1. All rules are compulsory for driving cunts, advisory for wanker cyclists and irrelevant to ninja cyclists. 2. To moan about ninja cyclists is a tacit admission to enjoying bum fun and molesting baby boys.. 3. Take Manky's name in vain, check your brake pipes. 4. Kill the planet with your noxious emissions. At least they smell better than you self-centered, inconsiderate chocolate tunnel afficionados Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted January 22, 2016 Report Share Posted January 22, 2016 1 minute ago, Manky said: I have a bike and all motorists are cunts with cyclecide in their hearts. Real highway code. 1. All rules are compulsory for driving cunts, advisory for wanker cyclists and irrelevant to ninja cyclists. 2. To moan about ninja cyclists is a tacit admission to enjoying bum fun and molesting baby boys.. 3. Take Manky's name in vain, check your brake pipes. 4. Kill the planet with your noxious emissions. At least they smell better than you self-centered, inconsiderate chocolate tunnel afficionados You're a cyclist, Manky? I had no idea. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted January 22, 2016 Author Report Share Posted January 22, 2016 1 minute ago, Manky said: I have a bike and all motorists are cunts with cyclecide in their hearts. Real highway code. 1. All rules are compulsory for driving cunts, advisory for wanker cyclists and irrelevant to ninja cyclists. 2. To moan about ninja cyclists is a tacit admission to enjoying bum fun and molesting baby boys.. 3. Take Manky's name in vain, check your brake pipes. 4. Kill the planet with your noxious emissions. At least they smell better than you self-centered, inconsiderate chocolate tunnel afficionados Oh, evening Manky - I've been expecting you.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted January 22, 2016 Report Share Posted January 22, 2016 For a list of total cunts, just see the posters above. I am a bit of a car spotter, I saw a nun in a red mini last week. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted January 22, 2016 Report Share Posted January 22, 2016 I think it's time to come out out....I'm a cyclist too. Go on then you bastards, do your worst! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted January 22, 2016 Report Share Posted January 22, 2016 I think emissions should be cut from the cyclist's argument entirely, what with all the amount they give out through faggy vaping, chaffing lycra, and constantly whinging about how hard done by they are. On the other hand, motorists could stop talking about this "road tax" that doesn't fucking exist, claiming the road belongs to them exclusively. You're paying for the lump you're travelling in, not the road you're on. In short: shut the fuck up and get from A to B without whining you fucking cunts. And faster too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted January 23, 2016 Report Share Posted January 23, 2016 3 hours ago, Manky said: I have a bike and all motorists are cunts with cyclecide in their hearts. Real highway code. 1. All rules are compulsory for driving cunts, advisory for wanker cyclists and irrelevant to ninja cyclists. 2. To moan about ninja cyclists is a tacit admission to enjoying bum fun and molesting baby boys.. 3. Take Manky's name in vain, check your brake pipes. 4. Kill the planet with your noxious emissions. At least they smell better than you self-centered, inconsiderate chocolate tunnel afficionados Ninja cyclists that fucking cracked me up. Nearly PML at that. Have a like from the gypsy Manky. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted January 23, 2016 Report Share Posted January 23, 2016 4 hours ago, nocti said: I think emissions should be cut from the cyclist's argument entirely, what with all the amount they give out through faggy vaping, chaffing lycra, and constantly whinging about how hard done by they are. On the other hand, motorists could stop talking about this "road tax" that doesn't fucking exist, claiming the road belongs to them exclusively. You're paying for the lump you're travelling in, not the road you're on. In short: shut the fuck up and get from A to B without whining you fucking cunts. And faster too. Lycra doesn't chafe.....err, wait.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted January 23, 2016 Report Share Posted January 23, 2016 5 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said: Ninja cyclists that fucking cracked me up. Nearly PML at that. Have a like from the gypsy Manky. "Nearly"? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted January 23, 2016 Report Share Posted January 23, 2016 Morning cunts. Cycle to work time. I feel good today, saving the planet. Kit check. Keys car scratching. 1 bunch. Got. Boots, hobnail. Car denting. Got Blinkers, rule ignoring. Got. Kit complete. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuntspotter Posted January 23, 2016 Report Share Posted January 23, 2016 11 hours ago, Ape said: This subject has been covered before no doubt but fuck it, these idiots deserve a re-cunt. Cyclists are always bleating on about how badly they are treated on the roads by motorists, but yet still feel it's acceptable, indeed almost their right, to completely ignore the rules of the road that the motoring public are expected to obey. A red light at a junction, to a motorist, means stop, yet to cyclists it seems to mean "fuck it, just go anyway". One way or no entry sign? Fuck it, just go anyway. Footpaths? Town centres? Public spaces? Not a problem when you're a cyclist, as the rules of the road just don't apply. Consequently, when these lane weaving, curb jumping cunts get mown down by an innocent motorist it serves them fucking right - hopefully they'll be maimed for life or killed. Fucking cunts the lot of them. Organ donors. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted January 23, 2016 Report Share Posted January 23, 2016 I shall be taking my Triumph to work today. Proper two wheeled transport, no engine = no good. Now fuck off! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted January 23, 2016 Report Share Posted January 23, 2016 30 minutes ago, cuntspotter said: Organ donors. Maybe. Heart: Big and strong through exercise and fresh air. Brain: Healthy through exercise and fresh air. Kidneys: Excellent through exercise and fresh air. Liver: Shit that useless fucker out years ago. Any recipient will be able to bask in the warm glow of knowing that at least part of him/her was once a planet saving, eco-friendly cycle Ninja who fought a relentless battle against evil car drivers and their evil, selfish, polluting arse bandit lifestyle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted January 23, 2016 Report Share Posted January 23, 2016 The only person I know with a sore arse rides a bicycle. What were they thinking making such devices of torture (saddle)? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted January 23, 2016 Report Share Posted January 23, 2016 I have to admit, even being a cyclist myself, that a lot of them do themselves no fucking favours. Cycling on pavements should incur an instant fucking hanging from the nearest lamp post and the cunts who jump red lights should be fucking run over. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted January 23, 2016 Report Share Posted January 23, 2016 15 minutes ago, Alfie Noakes said: The only person I know with a sore arse rides a bicycle. What were they thinking making such devices of torture (saddle)? You mean to tell me, Alf, that you live in Brighton and you only know one person with a sore arse? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted January 23, 2016 Report Share Posted January 23, 2016 4 minutes ago, Decimus said: You mean to tell me, Alf, that you live in Brighton and you only know one person with a sore arse? A sore arse would indicate they're not used to things being inserted or they're too big. Not something I'd associate with Brighton. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.