The Beast Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 Bought a new pair. Good fit and inexpensive. Sadly got caught in traffic in car, long jam, 2 hours without moving. Breaking my neck for a piss. Had to urinate at side of road, so much urgency built up, left it late, buttons on fly too tight, wresting like a good 'un, onlookers thinking I am jerking off, slashed all in the jeans and down my leg. Next time I'll buy ones with a zip. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ollyboro Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 First things first. You've opened yourself up to accusations of finding it easier to unzip bloke's flies, in public lavatories, with your teeth, if they're non-buttoned. Secondly, what's wrong with standing by the side of the road jerking off? It's all several of the members -see what I did there?- of the Corner do of an evening. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Beast Posted June 11, 2016 Author Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 10 minutes ago, Ollyboro said: First things first. You've opened yourself up to accusations of finding it easier to unzip bloke's flies, in public lavatories, with your teeth, if they're non-buttoned. Secondly, what's wrong with standing by the side of the road jerking off? It's all several of the members -see what I did there?- of the Corner do of an evening. Keep your sexual preferences to yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 8 minutes ago, Ollyboro said: First things first. You've opened yourself up to accusations of finding it easier to unzip bloke's flies, in public lavatories, with your teeth, if they're non-buttoned. Yes, consider yourself warned. And keep an eye out for Bill - no particular reason. 23 minutes ago, The Beast said: Next time I'll buy ones with a zip. Fuck button flies! I made that mistake once, several decades ago, and once was enough. Perhaps like me you were subconsciously swayed by the Levis 501 adverts, in which the homophonically-named Nick Kamen pulled fit looking chicks in the launderette at will? Sadly, let me tell you, chicks don't really dig blokes whose legs smell of piss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Beast Posted June 11, 2016 Author Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 10 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said: Yes, consider yourself warned. And keep an eye out for Bill - no particular reason. Fuck button flies! I made that mistake once, several decades ago, and once was enough. Perhaps like me you were subconsciously swayed by the Levis 501 adverts, in which the homophonically-named Nick Kamen pulled fit looking chicks in the launderette at will? Sadly, let me tell you, chicks don't really dig blokes whose legs smell of piss. My local launderette isn't so beautiful. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 25 minutes ago, The Beast said: My local launderette isn't so beautiful. You don't own a washing machine? Fucking loser. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Beast Posted June 11, 2016 Author Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 32 minutes ago, The Beast said: My local launderette isn't so beautiful. 5 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said: You don't own a washing machine? Fucking loser. I do not have a washing machine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 1 hour ago, The Beast said: Bought a new pair. Good fit and inexpensive. Sadly got caught in traffic in car, long jam, 2 hours without moving. Breaking my neck for a piss. Had to urinate at side of road, so much urgency built up, left it late, buttons on fly too tight, wresting like a good 'un, onlookers thinking I am jerking off, slashed all in the jeans and down my leg. Next time I'll buy ones with a zip. Next time just buy a fucking skirt....any man afraid of a bit of roadside wanking is obviously quite prone to Gayism...........I suggest to message Punkape and arrange a get togetherl Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Beast Posted June 11, 2016 Author Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 4 minutes ago, luke swarm said: Next time just buy a fucking skirt....any man afraid of a bit of roadside wanking is obviously quite prone to Gayism...........I suggest to message Punkape and arrange a get togetherl Thanks, but I don't want your sloppy seconds. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 35 minutes ago, The Beast said: I do not have a washing machine. How quaint. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 2 hours ago, The Beast said: Bought a new pair. Good fit and inexpensive. Sadly got caught in traffic in car, long jam, 2 hours without moving. Breaking my neck for a piss. Had to urinate at side of road, so much urgency built up, left it late, buttons on fly too tight, wresting like a good 'un, onlookers thinking I am jerking off, slashed all in the jeans and down my leg. Next time I'll buy ones with a zip. Next time you have the urge to get out of your car on the side of a busy motorway, instead of scaling the grassy bank and pissing yourself, may I suggest walking into the oncoming traffic. Fuck off, and welcome to CC you spastic-fingered cunt. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Beast Posted June 11, 2016 Author Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 1 hour ago, Bubbles said: Next time you have the urge to get out of your car on the side of a busy motorway, instead of scaling the grassy bank and pissing yourself, may I suggest walking into the oncoming traffic. Fuck off, and welcome to CC you spastic-fingered cunt. Are you any person of note to offer a welcome, or are you seeking help with your mental problems? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 3 hours ago, Cuntybaws said: Fuck button flies! One of my ex's loved button flies, if I went to see her and fancied a blow job or a shag, I'd just make sure I wore them, she had some weird fascination with undoing them from the inside... ... I never complained though, always brought a smile to my face! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 Pile of shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuntspotter Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 As worn by homosexuals. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 Just now, cuntspotter said: As worn by homosexuals. Well, hellooooooo!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuntspotter Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 Just now, DingTheRioja said: Well, hellooooooo!!!!!! Hello sailor! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 6 minutes ago, cuntspotter said: Hello sailor! Join the Navy, feel a man! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 What's 'inexpensive'? Tesco? Asda? Primark? Blue inc? M&S? They are all shit. The only jeans worth wearing are Levis 501, or if you are a cunt like this new cunt and cant undo some fucking buttons, then buy the 505s. They are 501s with a zip for spacktarded quimtrifles who cant cope with buttons. And next time, use the toilet before you go on a journey you cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 6 hours ago, Ollyboro said: First things first. You've opened yourself up to accusations of finding it easier to unzip bloke's flies, in public lavatories, with your teeth, if they're non-buttoned. Secondly, what's wrong with standing by the side of the road jerking off? It's all several of the members -see what I did there?- of the Corner do of an evening. You're a pervert. Fuck off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ollyboro Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 22 minutes ago, Punkape said: You're a pervert. Fuck off. That's exactly what the message read on the top of your last birthday cake. Written by your Mam, in a mixture of watery shit, spunk and blood. Pumped out of her slack arse Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 3 minutes ago, Ollyboro said: That's exactly what the message read on the top of your last birthday cake. Written by your Mam, in a mixture of watery shit, spunk and blood. Pumped out of her slack arse You're bitter because you have AIDS, permanent erectile dysfunction and dysentery. lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuntspotter Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 11 minutes ago, Punkape said: You're bitter because you have AIDS, permanent erectile dysfunction and dysentery. lol. Don't knock it til you've tried it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ollyboro Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 11 minutes ago, Punkape said: You're bitter because you have AIDS, permanent erectile dysfunction and dysentery. lol. So what's your excuse? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ollyboro Posted June 11, 2016 Report Share Posted June 11, 2016 1 minute ago, cuntspotter said: Don't knock it til you've tried it. Spunkers has attempted to sit on many flaccid cock, Spots. That's his essential tragedy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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