Guest Drew P Pissflaps Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 This can only be a good thing Bill as it'll mean you'll have to refrain from bum sex for a while, you mincing, slack ringed, faggot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 42 minutes ago, deebom said: Why was it pretentious? I want you to describe it to me in detail. Were there people with beards? What kind of drinks did it sell? What was the chicken flavoured with? Was it organic? Did it come with salad? Why were you in Soho? What condiments were available? What about bread, was there bread, maybe it was artisan bread? What ethnic grouping was the vendor? Where in Soho, not near that nasty little fruit and veg market? Did you visit Blackmarket records? If not, why not? Was the salt and pepper distributed from a shaker, or a grinder? Were there any famous cunts around? There usually is up there. What type of container did it come in? Was it recycled, or recyclable? Did you go to Oxford Street? Is it still an awful, god forsaken shitpit? Did they supply utensils? Were they plastic or wood? What else was on the menu? Was there a veggie option? What colour was the stall? I'm trying to build a mental picture here. Words such as artisan were displayed prominently on chalkboard signs in ornate handwriting, was marketed as being from some far flung region of the world, and it cost far more than it merited. Yes, of course there were people with beards, and topknots. It sold stuff that tastes exactly like Iceland imitation Rola Cola, but is marketing as something like Mr Smiths Home Brewed Organic Real English Cocoa Cola. Some fairly average spices, and salmonella. Of course it was fucking organic. Yes, it came with some shit salad. I work there unfortunately. The usual stuff. Yes, of course it was fucking artisan bread you fucking demented acid house cunt. He was white as could be, remember he had a topknot and beard. Yes, near that odious little veg market. Not that day, but I have and I thoroughy enjoy the fact you can order a beer and peruse the little tasting notes for the new vinyl; that probably makes me as pretentious as the chicken stand. Of course it came from a grinder, and an organic, free range wooden one from Nepal at that. Hopefully Noel Edmunds ate the chicken and died. It came in a shitty plastic takeaway box. No, it was bog standard plastic that pollutes the ocean and causes octopuses to become clinically depressed, the fucking hippy hypocrite cunts, and no, it was definitely not recycled. I despite Oxford Street and will take any backalley I can to avoid the throning mass of idiot tourists and unemployed natives. Yes, it is a shit pit that god abandoned sometime in the 1960s. Plastic, non-recyclable, hypocrite cunts. Probably various other things that causes one to shit their internal organs out, like fetid scallops and half cooked prawns. Of course there was a fucking veggie option, but do you really think my feeble mind bothers to retain such information? Brown like the shit that piled out of my arse this morning. OK? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 8 minutes ago, ThunderCunt said: Yeah what a load of old bollocks that was..but Bill is still pissing in the wind with this two bob nom. It wasn't funny the first time, and you've done the impossible and made it even less humorous the second time by repeating yourself. Remarkable stuff. What are your thoughts on claw hammers? That's always amusing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 Just now, Bill Stickers said: What are your thoughts on claw hammers? That's always amusing. Don't get him started - I don't think I could take such hilarity tonight. He's ruthlessly funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 Just now, Ape said: Don't get him started - I don't think I could take such hilarity tonight. He's ruthlessly funny. I want to be schooled by a veteran, high functioning cunt. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake The Muss Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 18 minutes ago, Bill Stickers said: It wasn't funny the first time, and you've done the impossible and made it even less humorous the second time by repeating yourself. Remarkable stuff. What are your thoughts on claw hammers? That's always amusing. You silly little gormless wonder, you know damn well what my thoughts are on claw hammers. Must i remind you, but of course i must as you're very low functioning, Billy Boy i feel we must meet on the cobbles to sort out our differences..how about it, are you free tomorrow evening ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake The Muss Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 17 minutes ago, Ape said: Don't get him started - I don't think I could take such hilarity tonight. He's ruthlessly funny. Apey let's not go back to hostile territory, i thought we was becoming pals, i told you that i would be turning my attentions to Quincer the Mincer. That half witted bucket of sap needs to be put in his place, do you want to watch..? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 4 minutes ago, ThunderCunt said: Apey let's not go back to hostile territory, i thought we was becoming pals, i told you that i would be turning my attentions to Quincer the Mincer. That half witted bucket of sap needs to be put in his place, do you want to watch..? I'll watch you try....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake The Muss Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 1 minute ago, Ape said: I'll watch you try....... It's all a free man can do Apey.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 52 minutes ago, Bill Stickers said: Words such as artisan were displayed prominently on chalkboard signs in ornate handwriting, was marketed as being from some far flung region of the world, and it cost far more than it merited. Yes, of course there were people with beards, and topknots. It sold stuff that tastes exactly like Iceland imitation Rola Cola, but is marketing as something like Mr Smiths Home Brewed Organic Real English Cocoa Cola. Some fairly average spices, and salmonella. Of course it was fucking organic. Yes, it came with some shit salad. I work there unfortunately. The usual stuff. Yes, of course it was fucking artisan bread you fucking demented acid house cunt. He was white as could be, remember he had a topknot and beard. Yes, near that odious little veg market. Not that day, but I have and I thoroughy enjoy the fact you can order a beer and peruse the little tasting notes for the new vinyl; that probably makes me as pretentious as the chicken stand. Of course it came from a grinder, and an organic, free range wooden one from Nepal at that. Hopefully Noel Edmunds ate the chicken and died. It came in a shitty plastic takeaway box. No, it was bog standard plastic that pollutes the ocean and causes octopuses to become clinically depressed, the fucking hippy hypocrite cunts, and no, it was definitely not recycled. I despite Oxford Street and will take any backalley I can to avoid the throning mass of idiot tourists and unemployed natives. Yes, it is a shit pit that god abandoned sometime in the 1960s. Plastic, non-recyclable, hypocrite cunts. Probably various other things that causes one to shit their internal organs out, like fetid scallops and half cooked prawns. Of course there was a fucking veggie option, but do you really think my feeble mind bothers to retain such information? Brown like the shit that piled out of my arse this morning. OK? Are you monumentalcunt? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 In theory it's possible for a bloke to fuck a female gorilla Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 1 hour ago, Bill Stickers said: Words such as artisan were displayed prominently on chalkboard signs in ornate handwriting, was marketed as being from some far flung region of the world, and it cost far more than it merited. Yes, of course there were people with beards, and topknots. It sold stuff that tastes exactly like Iceland imitation Rola Cola, but is marketing as something like Mr Smiths Home Brewed Organic Real English Cocoa Cola. Some fairly average spices, and salmonella. Of course it was fucking organic. Yes, it came with some shit salad. I work there unfortunately. The usual stuff. Yes, of course it was fucking artisan bread you fucking demented acid house cunt. He was white as could be, remember he had a topknot and beard. Yes, near that odious little veg market. Not that day, but I have and I thoroughy enjoy the fact you can order a beer and peruse the little tasting notes for the new vinyl; that probably makes me as pretentious as the chicken stand. Of course it came from a grinder, and an organic, free range wooden one from Nepal at that. Hopefully Noel Edmunds ate the chicken and died. It came in a shitty plastic takeaway box. No, it was bog standard plastic that pollutes the ocean and causes octopuses to become clinically depressed, the fucking hippy hypocrite cunts, and no, it was definitely not recycled. I despite Oxford Street and will take any backalley I can to avoid the throning mass of idiot tourists and unemployed natives. Yes, it is a shit pit that god abandoned sometime in the 1960s. Plastic, non-recyclable, hypocrite cunts. Probably various other things that causes one to shit their internal organs out, like fetid scallops and half cooked prawns. Of course there was a fucking veggie option, but do you really think my feeble mind bothers to retain such information? Brown like the shit that piled out of my arse this morning. OK? poof Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 2 hours ago, Bill Stickers said: Words such as artisan were displayed prominently on chalkboard signs in ornate handwriting, was marketed as being from some far flung region of the world, and it cost far more than it merited. Yes, of course there were people with beards, and topknots. It sold stuff that tastes exactly like Iceland imitation Rola Cola, but is marketing as something like Mr Smiths Home Brewed Organic Real English Cocoa Cola. Some fairly average spices, and salmonella. Of course it was fucking organic. Yes, it came with some shit salad. I work there unfortunately. The usual stuff. Yes, of course it was fucking artisan bread you fucking demented acid house cunt. He was white as could be, remember he had a topknot and beard. Yes, near that odious little veg market. Not that day, but I have and I thoroughy enjoy the fact you can order a beer and peruse the little tasting notes for the new vinyl; that probably makes me as pretentious as the chicken stand. Of course it came from a grinder, and an organic, free range wooden one from Nepal at that. Hopefully Noel Edmunds ate the chicken and died. It came in a shitty plastic takeaway box. No, it was bog standard plastic that pollutes the ocean and causes octopuses to become clinically depressed, the fucking hippy hypocrite cunts, and no, it was definitely not recycled. I despite Oxford Street and will take any backalley I can to avoid the throning mass of idiot tourists and unemployed natives. Yes, it is a shit pit that god abandoned sometime in the 1960s. Plastic, non-recyclable, hypocrite cunts. Probably various other things that causes one to shit their internal organs out, like fetid scallops and half cooked prawns. Of course there was a fucking veggie option, but do you really think my feeble mind bothers to retain such information? Brown like the shit that piled out of my arse this morning. OK? Christ almighty. A few more words there and it would be a novel. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 1 hour ago, Quincy Cockfingers said: Are you monumentalcunt? I'm Dean, Bill's Ricky Nelson, and you're the decrepit old cunt with the harmonica. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake The Muss Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 23 minutes ago, scotty said: Christ almighty. A few more words there and it would be a novel. A very bad novel..i would like to add. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 45 minutes ago, Decimus said: I'm Dean, Bill's Ricky Nelson, and you're the decrepit old cunt with the harmonica. I really have no clue what the reference is, but I just realised I'd like to stab Gurt just now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gong Farmer Posted August 23, 2016 Report Share Posted August 23, 2016 Why do you in the U.K put up with being charged for butter and sachets of sauces in food outlets? I was charged, nay, blatantly ripped off for the princely sum of 10p for a poxy knob of butter to go with a crappy stale scone with a pot of pissy tea in some shithouse tea room in Bourton on the Water a couple of weeks ago that stank like a pair of Camila Batmangheldjh's knickers on a hot day in Southall , fucking cunts. The fuckers even charged for an extra tea bag to make the fucking tea half palatable. Also had to pay for fucking olives and bread sticks in a restaurant in Berkhamsted. WHY? That shit should be free as is every fucking where else on the face of the planet. Why not charge for the fucking salt and pepper too? You can shove your fucking knobs of butter and 'jarred' olives up your fucking squeaky tight arses you mean spirited fucking stale scone and pissy tea selling cunts. And while I'm fucking at it....Those so called gastro pubs are a load of fucking wank too. Do any of the waiting staff actually speak fucking English anymore? Or have you all had to learn to speak fucking Polish and Bulgarian or fuck knows what else to be understood in these establishments ? Ordered a crab salad in one of them and ended up with a plate of lukewarm spaghetti hoops and a bowel of fucking Shreddies.... with an extra couple quid thrown in on top for the fucking milk and sugar mind. FFS! Never a-fucking-gain. Obligatory service charge? They're lucky I didn't tip the cunts with my fucking fist. Welcome to ''''GREAT'''' Britain!! it said in the holiday brochure when booking. Yeah right. Go fuck yourselves.... with a stale scone and a jar of fucking olives. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake The Muss Posted August 24, 2016 Report Share Posted August 24, 2016 3 hours ago, Decimus said: I'm Dean, Bill's Ricky Nelson, and you're the decrepit old cunt with the harmonica. Deminge you clumsy big dunce, how you doing old pal.? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted August 24, 2016 Report Share Posted August 24, 2016 6 hours ago, Gong Farmer said: Why do you in the U.K put up with being charged for butter and sachets of sauces in food outlets? I was charged, nay, blatantly ripped off for the princely sum of 10p for a poxy knob of butter to go with a crappy stale scone with a pot of pissy tea in some shithouse tea room in Bourton on the Water a couple of weeks ago that stank like a pair of Camila Batmangheldjh's knickers on a hot day in Southall , fucking cunts. The fuckers even charged for an extra tea bag to make the fucking tea half palatable. Also had to pay for fucking olives and bread sticks in a restaurant in Berkhamsted. WHY? That shit should be free as is every fucking where else on the face of the planet. Why not charge for the fucking salt and pepper too? You can shove your fucking knobs of butter and 'jarred' olives up your fucking squeaky tight arses you mean spirited fucking stale scone and pissy tea selling cunts. And while I'm fucking at it....Those so called gastro pubs are a load of fucking wank too. Do any of the waiting staff actually speak fucking English anymore? Or have you all had to learn to speak fucking Polish and Bulgarian or fuck knows what else to be understood in these establishments ? Ordered a crab salad in one of them and ended up with a plate of lukewarm spaghetti hoops and a bowel of fucking Shreddies.... with an extra couple quid thrown in on top for the fucking milk and sugar mind. FFS! Never a-fucking-gain. Obligatory service charge? They're lucky I didn't tip the cunts with my fucking fist. Welcome to ''''GREAT'''' Britain!! it said in the holiday brochure when booking. Yeah right. Go fuck yourselves.... with a stale scone and a jar of fucking olives. Last time I was in France, I asked some cunt in a deli to make a ham sandwich, she wanted to charge 50c more to butter the bread first, it would probably have been another euro for that shit weak-kneed lilly-livered mustard you lot make over there. ..and you can't make a decent cup of tea to save your fucking nation in a war you useless kraut stained fuckbags. 10 hours ago, Bill Stickers said: Words such as artisan were displayed prominently on chalkboard signs in ornate handwriting, was marketed as being from some far flung region of the world, and it cost far more than it merited. Yes, of course there were people with beards, and topknots. It sold stuff that tastes exactly like Iceland imitation Rola Cola, but is marketing as something like Mr Smiths Home Brewed Organic Real English Cocoa Cola. Some fairly average spices, and salmonella. Of course it was fucking organic. Yes, it came with some shit salad. I work there unfortunately. The usual stuff. Yes, of course it was fucking artisan bread you fucking demented acid house cunt. He was white as could be, remember he had a topknot and beard. Yes, near that odious little veg market. Not that day, but I have and I thoroughy enjoy the fact you can order a beer and peruse the little tasting notes for the new vinyl; that probably makes me as pretentious as the chicken stand. Of course it came from a grinder, and an organic, free range wooden one from Nepal at that. Hopefully Noel Edmunds ate the chicken and died. It came in a shitty plastic takeaway box. No, it was bog standard plastic that pollutes the ocean and causes octopuses to become clinically depressed, the fucking hippy hypocrite cunts, and no, it was definitely not recycled. I despite Oxford Street and will take any backalley I can to avoid the throning mass of idiot tourists and unemployed natives. Yes, it is a shit pit that god abandoned sometime in the 1960s. Plastic, non-recyclable, hypocrite cunts. Probably various other things that causes one to shit their internal organs out, like fetid scallops and half cooked prawns. Of course there was a fucking veggie option, but do you really think my feeble mind bothers to retain such information? Brown like the shit that piled out of my arse this morning. OK? There's your problem, if you'd asked for some recycled biodegradable bog paper bag for it he wouldn't have added the salmonella to teach you the error of your ways... ..or get fish and chips instead. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gong Farmer Posted August 24, 2016 Report Share Posted August 24, 2016 1 hour ago, DingTheRioja said: Last time I was in France, I asked some cunt in a deli to make a ham sandwich, she wanted to charge 50c more to butter the bread first, it would probably have been another euro for that shit weak-kneed lilly-livered mustard you lot make over there. ..and you can't make a decent cup of tea to save your fucking nation in a war you useless kraut stained fuckbags. There's your problem, if you'd asked for some recycled biodegradable bog paper bag for it he wouldn't have added the salmonella to teach you the error of your ways... ..or get fish and chips instead. You must have been singled you out for being from the U.K, I can see you struggling to order now..'' Uno hamo sandwicho witho moreo buttero on zie breado... por va vour!'' They must have thought... Who's this clueless fucking tit? You should have mentioned that you won the war, you might got your fucking buttero for free. You embarrassing twit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank Posted August 24, 2016 Report Share Posted August 24, 2016 1 hour ago, DingTheRioja said: Last time I was in France, I asked some cunt in a deli to make a ham sandwich, she wanted to charge 50c more to butter the bread first, it would probably have been another euro for that shit weak-kneed lilly-livered mustard you lot make over there. ..and you can't make a decent cup of tea to save your fucking nation in a war you useless kraut stained fuckbags. There's your problem, if you'd asked for some recycled biodegradable bog paper bag for it he wouldn't have added the salmonella to teach you the error of your ways... ..or get fish and chips instead. You oily fucking greasy grass of a cunt. Never ask for butter in France! Ignorant English pig. I fucking hate you ding. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted August 24, 2016 Report Share Posted August 24, 2016 @DingTheRioja, rather than quote your long-winded bollocks, I thought I'd keep it short. Firstly, you are fucking idiot. For further information, please refer to the below. Secondly, see above. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gong Farmer Posted August 24, 2016 Report Share Posted August 24, 2016 1 hour ago, Bubba C said: @DingTheRioja, rather than quote your long-winded bollocks, I thought I'd keep it short. Firstly, you are fucking idiot. For further information, please refer to the below. Secondly, see above. The last time the silly self entitled cunt was in France was for the D Day landings when he won the fucking war. He probably thought those French cunts owed him that fucking ham sandwich with extra butter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted August 24, 2016 Report Share Posted August 24, 2016 As soon as the staff saw you pulling up in your campervan ding, with your sunburnt forehead and horrible little children, the whole service station simultaneously rubbed their hands with glee and breathed a desperate sorry sigh. You're hated the world over, in every continent, by every culture. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gong Farmer Posted August 24, 2016 Report Share Posted August 24, 2016 20 minutes ago, Bill Stickers said: As soon as the staff saw you pulling up in your campervan ding, with your sunburnt forehead and horrible little children, the whole service station simultaneously rubbed their hands with glee and breathed a desperate sorry sigh. You're hated the world over, in every continent, by every culture. I bet the bandy legged beer bellied cunt looked 18 karat standing there in his baggy knee length shorts and grubby ten year old England footy shirt. The holiday snaps must be fucking hilarious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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