James Bond The Third has died

[Guest Alfie Noakes]

Goodbye Sir Roger, you were the funniest and best Bond. Forget counting David Niven, not a bond in my view.

Cancer is the cunt here, not Sir Roger.

Discuss.

[applescruff14]

Thought 2016 was bad but this year is probably worse.

[Guest Alfie Noakes]

Sir Roger was so much more than 007. He did a lot of ambassadorial work for UNICEF etc after he retired from acting when he could have just put his feet up and drink gin.

[Guest Snatch]

2 hours ago, applescruff14 said:

Thought 2016 was bad but this year is probably worse.

It might be worse but your still playing the same record.

[Guest Ollyboro]

2 hours ago, Alfie Noakes said:

Goodbye Sir Roger, you were the funniest and best Bond. Forget counting David Niven, not a bond in my view.

Cancer is the cunt here, not Sir Roger.

Discuss.

STOP GETTING BOND WRONG!! 

[Guest Ollyboro]

The best Bond was the cunt who  invented everycunt's favourite hairy non -European immigrant ie Paddington Bear. Although though the true genius was the cunt who did the Mr Men drawings. An untrained acid casualty, I'd fucking wager.

[Eric Cuntman]

1 hour ago, Ollyboro said:

The best Bond was the cunt who  invented everycunt's favourite hairy non -European immigrant ie Paddington Bear. Although though the true genius was the cunt who did the Mr Men drawings. An untrained acid casualty, I'd fucking wager.

The Mr Men was a stroke of genius, "Hello, I'm Mr Easy To Draw!"

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

He had the charm to pull off shagging the leading ladies.  The rest of them were nothing more than hooligans paid to fake fight.  

Daniel Craig is a cunt.  

[Cap'n Cunt]

I'm going to buy his eyebrows if I see them on eBay.

[Guest deebom]

The only Bond actor that understood that it was tongue in cheek. 

I've been reading about Moores legendary drinking, shagging, fighting and being an all round bloody good bloke for years. Everyone seemed to have fucking loved him.

[Guest Ollyboro]

My favourite film review was in some shitty regional newspaper or other. The review was for  "The Man With The Golden Gun". It said: 

Christopher Lee has 3 nipples, Roger Moore one expression.

[Hokey Gingers]

Roger Moore. A poor man`s Timothy Dalton. Wasn`t scared to give the wife a clip either.

[Eric Cuntman]

21 minutes ago, Hokey Gingers said:

Roger Moore. A poor man`s Timothy Dalton. Wasn`t scared to give the wife a clip either.

She deserved it. True story coming up: my dad was an engineer for Post office Telecommunications (later BT) in the early 1970s. He and a colleague were tasked with fitting telephone points in 4 of the bedrooms of Dorothy Squires Mansion in Bexley, Kent. All the rooms in the house were littered with empty gin bottles and 3 of the beds in the house were covered in excrement, the lady herself never appeared and was locked in a different room while the work was being done, he said it was gut churning, a hopeless, insane, bed shitting alcoholic. Moore was no longer with her at the time, and the rumour was that the split had led her to this sorry state.

[Guest Lady Penelope]

5 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

She deserved it. True story coming up: my dad was an engineer for Post office Telecommunications (later BT) in the early 1970s. He and a colleague were tasked with fitting telephone points in 4 of the bedrooms of Dorothy Squires Mansion in Bexley, Kent. All the rooms in the house were littered with empty gin bottles and 3 of the beds in the house were covered in excrement, the lady herself never appeared and was locked in a different room while the work was being done, he said it was gut churning, a hopeless, insane, bed shitting alcoholic. Moore was no longer with her at the time, and the rumour was that the split had led her to this sorry state.

Around that time Roger Moore was actually living at a house about two miles from Nantwich in Cheshire close to what is now the junction between the A51 and the A534. I was told that he kept a Cessna at a private airstrip a few miles away close to Oulton Park.

 

[Eric Cuntman]

7 minutes ago, The Lady Penelope said:

Around that time Roger Moore was actually living at a house about two miles from Nantwich in Cheshire close to what is now the junction between the A51 and the A534. I was told that he kept a Cessna at a private airstrip a few miles away close to Oulton Park.

 

She went doolally when he left and refused a divorce, frantically suing anybody who suggested he was married to or involved with someone else, the story goes that when the mansion burned down in 1974, the only things she saved were the love letters from Roger Moore and her dog. No divorce was granted for years after they split, despite Moores repeated attempts.

[Guest Lady Penelope]

Someone I worked for before I joined the railway claimed to have bedded Dorothy a few times just after the war. I was later told by Count Bartelli the wrestler that this was true.

 

[camberwell gypsy]

James Bond III was a little black guy with big glasses who appeared in a programme called The Red Hand Gang. Fuck me is he dead? 

[ratcum]

I still tire of these cunts who say "Sean Connery really was the best Bond". Well when the mumbling jock was replaced by Moore and Live and Let Die was released, no one but NO ONE was saying that. The same chodes go on about liking a band's early stuff, by which they mean the inaccessible, shit stuff that didn't sell. Ah yes, you're really cool mate.

[Eric Cuntman]

18 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

James Bond III was a little black guy with big glasses who appeared in a programme called The Red Hand Gang. Fuck me is he dead? 

I remember that shit, the black kids character was called 'Doc', it was a bit like our programme 'Grahams Gang'.

[Eric Cuntman]

3 minutes ago, ratcum said:

I still tire of these cunts who say "Sean Connery really was the best Bond". Well when the mumbling jock was replaced by Moore and Live and Let Die was released, no one but NO ONE was saying that. The same chodes go on about liking a band's early stuff, by which they mean the inaccessible, shit stuff that didn't sell. Ah yes, you're really cool mate.

This is a normal, lucid, non surreal comment Ratty. Have you run out of Evo-Stik and Quayludin?

[ratcum]

1 minute ago, Eric Cuntman said:

This is a normal, lucid, non surreal comment Ratty. Have you run out of Evo-Stik and Quayludin?

Sorry Authoritah, see my post on spats. It'll take me weeks to get back to Potato Narnia after that

[Eric Cuntman]

True thingy number 2: the first person to act as James Bond was Bob Holness, the host of blockbusters. It was a radio adaptation and he supplied the voice of Bond.

[Guest nobgobbler]

6 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

True thingy number 2: the first person to act as James Bond was Bob Holness, the host of blockbusters. It was a radio adaptation and he supplied the voice of Bond.

Did he manage to drop in the occasional "I'll have a P please Bob"?

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

8 hours ago, The Lady Penelope said:

Someone I worked for before I joined the railway claimed to have bedded Dorothy a few times just after the war. I was later told by Count Bartelli the wrestler that this was true.

 

Joined?  Pen, no need to dodge the truth, you didn't join the railway, you simply ride from train to train, camping in yards, and succumbing to the drunken advances of the other male rail transients.  

[Eric Cuntman]

10 hours ago, nobgobbler said:

Did he manage to drop in the occasional "I'll have a P please Bob"?

Everybody knows James Bond had a PPK, you big silly!