Combatting Covid - CC Advice

[Guest 'eavensabove]

It's been quite a night for The Stool of The North. He's shown to have a spring in his step, and is a simple casualty of isolation (see below)

One can only feel for his pigeons. The coming to terms with isolation will be particularly problematic to the Norths. What with home-deliveries being unheard of save for the dropping of sprogs. They will all of course, be struggling against poverty, wanting a good-life and to go back to school. We should never forget that there's a fine line between hyphenated words, and even though The Stool of The North has been proven guilty of being a 24 carat plonker, he is appealing... He is also the youngest of three, both of his parents are older, and just as with like all trampoline salesmen, he has his ups & downs.

Edited April 17, 2020 by 'eavensabove
WASHING MY HANDS FOR 20 SECONDS

[Eric Cuntman]

14 hours ago, King Billy said:

Dick Turban wore a mask and as far as I know he never rode his horse into a tower block.

 

Ratty's definitely the best on here.

[Major Cunt]

23 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Yes Billy, I'm alright. Eagerly anticipating Jewdy's response. It will be at least 72 hours coming, he will address me as 'hardman', make a transparent attempt to coerce me into getting banned for calling him a paedo, and sign off with 'know what I mean?'

What an entirely predictable, fat little spastic alcoholic. Lol

Yeah, that's pretty much how I see it playing out. He'll also possibly call you brightboy, tell you to wash your tongue, and possibly state what he's purchased from Tesco.

What an utter bellend.

[King Billy]

On 17/04/2020 at 17:05, 'eavensabove said:

errrrm. Disturbing news Ratters, and none more so than the current niggalese 'recovery rate' figures in both Jammyland & Nigerijam.

152 recovered: 13 dead and subsequently a staggering 21 recovered with just 5 deaths. Methinks the virus disintegrates on contact with Bro' darkie, coupled with their nasal dispersion which as we know is widespread and hasn't reached its peak.

 

His nose is now being used as a drive through virus testing station. Cars and Transit size vans only.

[Guest 'eavensabove]

4 minutes ago, King Billy said:

His nose is now being used as a drive through virus testing station. Cars and Transit size vans only.

That's uncanny. They're already testing his head as a replacement for Velcro in Scotland I think. Chock, his name is. 

[Guest 'eavensabove]

@ratcum  

Main principles

Advice primarily designed to assist people who are required to manage the bodies of deceased persons infected with coronavirus (COVID-19)

This guidance has been developed to ensure that:

• the bodies of those people who have died as a result of coronavirus (COVID-19) are treated with sensitivity, dignity and respect.

What you need to know

Those handling bodies should be aware that there is likely to be a continuing risk of infection from the body fluids and tissues of cases where coronavirus (SARS-CoV2) infection is identified, through either a clinical diagnosis or laboratory confirmation.

[Guest 'eavensabove]

Well, we can all sit back chill-out and relax, with the knowledge that Myanmar have saved the day by sending the NHS 140,000 gowns.

[camberwell gypsy]

1 hour ago, 'eavensabove said:

Well, we can all sit back chill-out and relax, with the knowledge that Myanmar have saved the day by sending the NHS 140,000 gowns.

I'm mesmerized looking at her. I'm expecting an alien to burst out of her chest. 

[Guest 'eavensabove]

3 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

I'm mesmerized looking at her. I'm expecting an alien to burst out of her chest. 

Siamese Twins?

She's gearing herself-up to flick two peanuts. 

Edited April 20, 2020 by 'eavensabove
DIPPING ME MASK IN DETOL FOR A MINUTE OR TWO.

[ratcum]

6 hours ago, 'eavensabove said:

@ratcum  

Main principles

Advice primarily designed to assist people who are required to manage the bodies of deceased persons infected with coronavirus (COVID-19)

This guidance has been developed to ensure that:

• the bodies of those people who have died as a result of coronavirus (COVID-19) are treated with sensitivity, dignity and respect.

What you need to know

Those handling bodies should be aware that there is likely to be a continuing risk of infection from the body fluids and tissues of cases where coronavirus (SARS-CoV2) infection is identified, through either a clinical diagnosis or laboratory confirmation.

Two things 'Bove:

1. @ratcum is not a suitable form of address 

2. You're top of the leader board thingy

I expect cheap shots like this from that Eric and his absurd toadies, but not from a respected cuntfinder major.

🍡

[Guest 'eavensabove]

13 minutes ago, ratcum said:

Two things 'Bove:

1. @ratcum is not a suitable form of address 

2. You're top of the leader board thingy

I expect cheap shots like this from that Eric and his absurd toadies, but not from a respected cuntfinder major.

🍡

7.       'bove (will do with a little "b")

26.     I aint in charge of my own destiny. The thingy is meaningless.

14.     ratters.

[Guest N/A]

On 14/04/2020 at 02:11, 'eavensabove said:

You're probably wondering how "YOU" can do your bit to save our community from the spread... After all, CC HQ can only do so much and let's face it, the stark reality is that it's not been much at all really, has it? Ex-NHS Dr. Spot, hasn't been heard of in your hours of need, Rick did a runner before so much as a sniff, and as for Roops?

Now, I'm not one for putting me oars in, but I'd be failing me duties if I didn't at least give some sound advice which in turn may just prevent some spread and give you lot some serious food for thought whilst jogging your memories in sharing your methods of staying alive for the good benefit & survival of The Corner.

HOW TO SHOP:  Before you shop, ask yerself:  "Am I well enough to go shopping?"   "Do I need to go shopping today?"   "Could I manage without going shopping?"    "Can I bake me own bread?"    "Am I willing to avoid any contact with others?"    "Have I a Bag For Life at my disposal?"   "Am I prepared to wash me hands?"

These are just a few things you'll have to consider during this crisis and it's not too late to stay safe provided you know what you're doing. 

 

The fact is there is NO cure and the virus will eventually very soon be allowed to wash through the entire population.   So if you are NOT immune enough to this virus....you are dead .....ok.     Simple.

no one can sit in their bedsit like Bill Stickers has for the past ten years without any form of social interaction.   Even that miserable loser has contact with the pizza delivery boy every Thursday evening, sometimes not even for sex.    Plus he does see his mummy who pops round to collect a black bin bag full of spunk soiled socks and pants off his bedroom floor that she washes for him in the local launderette.   
 

best advice is, stay fit and healthy if you already are.  If you have health issues, diabetes, heart problems or breathing issues, then it’s likely you will not make xmas.   At best you will spend several weeks on a ventilator in a temporary nightingale hospital where the virus will destroy your lungs to a point where you will never do sport again and your life expectancy will be reduced to say 65 tops.....  so all yo unfit millennial fat cunts are fucking dead.  You have had your last chicken nugget !!!!

[ratcum]

10 hours ago, 'eavensabove said:

7.       'bove (will do with a little "b")

26.     I aint in charge of my own destiny. The thingy is meaningless.

14.     ratters.

loony

[Penny Farthing]

Presently advice is being given re spending RAMADAN under lockdown  .. tbh there is only on possible form of advice that should be give .. stop being fuckwits and worshipping an imaginary sky fairy.

[Stubby Pecker]

13 hours ago, ratcum said:

Two things 'Bove:

1. @ratcum is not a suitable form of address 

2. You're top of the leader board thingy

I expect cheap shots like this from that Eric and his absurd toadies, but not from a respected cuntfinder major.

🍡

You're dead fuckin' meat

[Guest 'eavensabove]

10 hours ago, Monumental cunt said:

The fact is there is NO cure and the virus will eventually very soon be allowed to wash through the entire population.   So if you are NOT immune enough to this virus....you are dead .....ok.     Simple.

no one can sit in their bedsit like Bill Stickers has for the past ten years without any form of social interaction.   Even that miserable loser has contact with the pizza delivery boy every Thursday evening, sometimes not even for sex.    Plus he does see his mummy who pops round to collect a black bin bag full of spunk soiled socks and pants off his bedroom floor that she washes for him in the local launderette.   
 

best advice is, stay fit and healthy if you already are.  If you have health issues, diabetes, heart problems or breathing issues, then it’s likely you will not make xmas.   At best you will spend several weeks on a ventilator in a temporary nightingale hospital where the virus will destroy your lungs to a point where you will never do sport again and your life expectancy will be reduced to say 65 tops.....  so all yo unfit millennial fat cunts are fucking dead.  You have had your last chicken nugget !!!!

Bang on the money. Furthermore, you aint getting no ventilator or even so much as a hospital bed unless you're considered to be an asset for 'the future' and worth trying to save. 19,000+ dead? My arse. You can double that amount today by adding those that have snuffed it their homes having spent their final breaths pleading to a poxy NHS 111 recorded message, if they've been fortunate enough to get through in the first place. They know EXACTLY how many have died in their homes, but by the time they release the figures the ones that are left won't give two fucks... In the UK alone you can average around 1,200 people per day have died up to now, and those figures will continue (and quite probably increase) on a daily basis unless every last fucker is PPE'd up 24/7 365... PPE is about the only thing that will give you a fighting chance if going about your 'previous life' and that is the sole reason why the government has advised that 'masks' are not needed, as they cant even get enough of the poxy things for themselves. We aint seen or heard fuck all yet, and only a very lucky few are gonna see or hear anything at all by this time next year.

Your one & only safest place is to cling on to the periscope of the HMS 科维德 Anti-Covid-Class Submarine, as it surfaces to pick-up the Wung Lung family from Tilbury Docks.

 

[Guest 'eavensabove]

3 hours ago, ratcum said:

loony

and a lot more besides.

[ratcum]

47 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said:

You're dead fuckin' meat

'Bove will be destroyed by a plague of frogs invading his bottom.

It is written Stubl

🐸

[Stubby Pecker]

11 minutes ago, ratcum said:

'Bove will be destroyed by a plague of frogs invading his bottom.

It is written Stubl

🐸

He'd most likely enjoy that herr ratty, the mad cunt

[ratcum]

On 21/04/2020 at 13:49, Stubby Pecker said:

He'd most likely enjoy that herr ratty, the mad cunt

 

 

[King Billy]

1 hour ago, ratcum said:

'Bove will be destroyed by a plague of frogs invading his bottom.

It is written Stubl

🐸

Liking the new avatar Ratters.

[Guest 'eavensabove]

18 hours ago, Stubby Pecker said:

He'd most likely enjoy that herr ratty, the mad cunt

I'll have you know, that it was terrible experience, and one that I have taken every last precaution to avoid from ever happening again. Trust me, it was no laughing croak. 

[Guest 'eavensabove]

18 hours ago, ratcum said:

'Bove will be destroyed by a plague of frogs invading his bottom.

It is written Stubl

🐸

It simply won't happen.

In fact, you've jumped to the wrong conclusion. 

[Guest 'eavensabove]

On 18/04/2020 at 10:45, Eric Cuntman said:

Dick Turban wore a mask and as far as I know he never rode his horse into a tower block.

Wasn't he a Hauweiman? 

Having perused AliExpress this very morn' there is page after page of PPE and masks from 67p each, delivery within 48hrs. They are identical in every way to those being pleaded for by the NHS front-line workers. The masks themselves can be purchased by the fucking shipload, and are all produced & shipped from: China. 

[Guest Monaco Slim]

HOW THE HELL AM I GOING TO CATCH A FAKE VIRUS????????