Goober

Pool... Voyeurism... Errrmmm... No, let's not go there.

This bloke might be a light-footed, fudge nudging, ball caresser, but with one announcement he's secured a fucking good income for life, regardless of whether he has any footballing talent. If it turns out that he doesn't cut it at Blackpool, do you think they would dare not renew his contract? Homophobia! The woke masses would scream. The more abuse he gets from the stands, the higher his profile will become. After he retires from playing it's odds on he's guaranteed a cushy well paid job with the FA promoting rainbow coloured inclusivity. Perhaps even more likely, he'll end up being a roving (raving?) sports pundit for the BBC. Expect to see his weekly reports, broadcast from the changing rooms, on Football Focus.

Breaking News - Blackpool reveal their new home and away kits for the 2022/23 season:

Look on the bright side, Eric, McCain handing out free tablets to 'special' kids keeps a steady trickle of new members coming to the site. I doubt The Corner would have received BronyKeith's memorable contributions without McCain's largesse.

No surprise. I'm indifferent to Ukraine winning BenderVision. It's an anti-Russian vote, so fair enough. I rather enjoyed the Spanish entry, for obvious reasons. The Serb woman performing some pre-fisting lubrication and actions was weird as fuck and the less said about the Norwegians wanting to fuck their grandmothers with bananas the better. The stomach churning gay fest that was the Italian entry, that for some strange reason was so liked by Mr Norton, was a fucking disgrace.

I've got an ancient water blaster in the shed (it probably needs some new o rings, I wonder if I could find someone that charges £40 an hour to replace them?) that hasn't been touched in over a decade since Norfolk was overrun with Poles that were born with sponges for hands.

Ukraine... Baltic. Classic.

Of course they were genuine, Bill. I'm very sorry that you're impotent.

I'm not apologising to anyone for your floppy chipolata, Bill. It's all on you to make amends for your inadequacy.

Well, now you mention it, one of the things I posted wasn't entirely accurate. Everyone is going to laugh at you.

I'm led to believe that in a few years there will be three races in the US every season. That'll be fun. I long for the return of the days when there was a 10% chance of at least one driver dying every race. It's the only thing that could rescue this current bore fest.

The buying for a friend / customer excuse. It's OK, Bill, it's the 21st century, you can open up to The Corner about your trauma of being as limp as wet lettuce whilst Ana de Armas is self fisting for you. No one is going to laugh at you.

Sexist cunt. The lefties are going to cancel you for that.

Wanting to watch Judge get fucked in the arse is a brave admission, but whatever floats your boat, Drew.

Gay Rwandan Scottish. Jesus Christ. He's going to nut Davros unconscious, drag him out his wheelchair and arse fuck him before finally hacking him into a thousand pieces with his rainbow handled responsibly sourced machete.

I think this one is more likely to be equipped with a sonic machete, or even worse, a sonic butt plug. Either way, the cybermen are going to be shitting themselves.

I've seen it, but it's not been my personal experience, RK. Then again, I'm not fucking stupid enough to start fisticuffs with anyone that could do me serious harm. My old man taught me to never turn my back on someone that's drunk and kicking off, and if it's unavoidable, get the first punch in and really make it count. People with their nose spread across their face can't see to hit back. It's invaluable advice.

I imagine that Kristin has, if you're a bloke, a blue waffle flange that you could plunge your bottle of Grolsch into to chill it. She's handsome, for a bird, but if you're lusting after that, you're definitely in the closet.

Well, I'm not a huge fan of the commercialised ritual of men pounding each other in the ring for 10 rounds, but very, very occasionally it's necessary to plant one on an idiot and fuck them up. The bleeding heart liberals might want us all to settle our differences through dialogue and mutual dick sucking, but nothing brings a twat into line quicker than a good hard, knuckles first punch to the larynx.

That's a scary thought.

Never been in a fight? What's life like for a homosexualist in Newcastle these days? Has the BBC campaign to make heterosexuality abnormal made life more tolerable for them these days?

Porridge slot? Salted or with sugar? I could be wrong, Baws, but something tells me she'd not be interested in the contents of your blue and white saltire patterned y-fronts either, given that she's a dirty, fermented fish-smelling, clit sucking lesbo. I'd probably lend her one, if she paid me.

Fair play, they did well to find one with teeth, considering all the khat they chew.

After all the bits that have snapped off during what passes for coitus in the Kleftiko household, she probably does in the fridge icebox now.