Dyslexic cnut

You can’t bluff your way out of the Spanish Inquisition, no matter how hard you try, you can’t Torquemada it....

Surely not! Hoylake Golf course is a municipal (spits.) He’ll be next door at Royal Liverpool I’d have thought, wanking over an albatross.

Four of the top eight, so, erm 50% of the main newsworthy stories on the BBC website this morning: ’the black reporter on British TV in the swinging sixties’ ’White supremecist songs found on streaming services’ ’Marcus Rashford saves the fuckin planet’ ’Migrants being detained in unfit conditions.’ Further on is the Stormzy (who?) thing, a section devoted all matters coonery, a piece on St Idris Elba and his fat-arsed wife, Nigeria’s problems (made me smile) and a bit on poor, dead arse-bandit footballer Justin Fashanu. Now conservative estimates put the black population of this country at 2.6%....so how is it that everytime I turn this cunt station on and see it’s presenter’s racial demographic, I have to check I’m not watching Congo T.V?

Hopefully, on the bullet-hole or helmet. Liberace-tiger-cunts.

Only time its available & that’s what they’re charging. There’s an additional fee to sleep in the Royal bed & they’re flogging vials (or viles) of crispy, orange-order dna....are you on a percentage?

The Lodge...ffs, they really did poison ur cider down there..

You sure? £610 for that gaff you were in, beginning of December...😳

I’m not convinced with Bill’s ‘mask wanker’ stance as he has just fucked off for a holiday to Devon shortly after the govt. published data stating that it was the safest place in England right now Re: Chinky bat flu...

It was the fat cunts who kept the hospitality sector alive, swilling oceans of ale & buying half-price lard burgers & pizzas. Plus, they keep nurses & quacks busy with their various blubber-induced ailments. God bless ‘em all I say.

I’d love to pollard Eve.

Spoff relish in her barnet and after wiping your dripping helmet on the curtains and are about to leave the room, glibly look over your shoulder and whisper...’run your fingers through that...Cunt!’ Too gallant? I am old-fashioned I’ve been told.

Mother & daughter action though...and then the mallet?

‘Hate’ not ‘had’...though thinking about it.....

Lady Lloyd...clearly taught her daughter how to use her coiffured clam to slide up as many greasy poles as she could. I had both of these cunts and would smile, and probably snap one off if I read that had both been Boko Haram’d while on safari somewhere posh. Posh-hooker cunts.

True, but I’d make sure she didn’t enjoy it & then I’d test the durability of her lower bowel and her head and shoulders with several pumps of gentleman’s relish and a mallet. Nepotistic Cunt.

Not to mention the 50 year old roid boys having heart attacks, or gym bunny slappers who’s tits & lips have exploded by their late 40’s & whose silicone piss flaps have dropped off & the NHS have to pick up the tab to re-minge the vain skanks...etc, etc.

I was having this row today. Gym owners demanding to be allowed to open up because they’re providing a mental health service. Get fucked, you want to make money which is why you started the fucking business in the 1st place. Since these cunts reopened, clients have to remain in a very restricted space. Therefore you can exercise in your flat/lounge/ garden/prison cell. You can still jog, cycle or hop around a park or on a beach. The idea that without getting lycra’d up and fucking about in a poxy gym, surrounded by narcissistic mirror-dwellers, we’d all go mental and top ourselves is utter bollocks. I hope the cunts infect one another or get killed by loose flying gel-lubricated dumb bell...in the eye-socket. Cunts.

What’s his knickname....’shitty-arse?’

I renounced Catholicism after Father Ratzinger heard my confession and for penance told me to do five Hail Mary’s and ten Heil Hitlers. Popey Kraut Cunt

‘Lukewarm?’ The incarcerated ferret in Porridge?

I’m waiting for some Cunt MD to verify this but there maybe a link between having a 1” diameter brown letterbox and the ‘postman’ delivering oversized parcels. It would probably alter my tonal utterings if I’m being honest.

They can do what they want to one another’s nobs & ringpieces for all I care and some of them are decent blokes. It’s the squealy little hyper-camp cunts that I loathe, & the hijacking of the meeeedja by them and it’s promotion as a trendy lifestyle option that boils my piss. Oh, that and why, when one of these cunts comes out, do they suddenly get a lisp and start talking like a woman x 10? Anyone on here with medical training who can tell me if there is a connection from the lower colon and sphincter to the voice box?

‘Stabbed’ where though...?

‘Scottie’ was a black Bermudian ‘rummy’ who was hung like somebody with a huge black penis. He was arrested on several occasions for parking his paralytic rum-soaked arse in a local park, in the summer sun, digging a hole in the ground and shagging it within an inch of it peaty life. He got locked up for horse-rodgerisation on several occasions too. The said gee-gee’s had to be put-down....nice fella though if I’m being honest.