Guest Posted September 14, 2014 Report Share Posted September 14, 2014 Happy clappy Twats. Whats the point in paying to see a show then drowning out the show but clapping like beach load of seals with special needs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted September 14, 2014 Report Share Posted September 14, 2014 If you're happy and you know it .........never mind! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 How about a sea of fucking mobile screens in front of you spoiling the view. Why do people do this? Your phone is hardly a Sony handycam and do you think the tiny microphone on your phone can handle the audio pressure in a gig without distorting or over compressing the sound? Your YouTube clips of this gig will be unwatchable and the artist will not be happy with the bootlegging. Ban mobiles at gigs and clapping before the end of a song. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 What's worse is some cunt behind you trying to sing along to every song. I paid good money to see and listen to the singer on the stage not some fucking knob in the audience. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 OK ..who's had the clap? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jiggerycock Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 You've paid good money to go to a gig in the hope of sharing in an uplifting, communal, 'sticking it to the man' rock n' roll moment - oh no, wait, you haven't. You've gone to record it on some pathetic shit device, that at best will give you that 'I've got Parkinsons Disease' feel when you watch it and that 'Who let the wasps out?' feel when you listen to it, so you can have a 'ménage a un' watching it back on your laptop......you fucking spastic! Clappers? All a bit 'meh' really. Bit difficult clapping in time to Bolthrower, but I'm off to see Otway in Harpenden on Friday so maybe it'll be a bit more sedate and 'clapping friendly'. I'll get back and let you know. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 Cunts that clap in time are cunts indeed, but cunts that clap out of time - especially at evangelical Christian services - are by far the biggest cunts of all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 I cannot imagine anything worse than to be sat in audience in direct contact with sweaty-excitable disease-ridden freaks. You wouldn't find me at some Pop Concert, or at any of the Town Hall's where they take place, less there was complete audience segregation between side-screens and with ones own Tea & Coffee making facilities in situ. It is also my understanding that Pop Concerts can become rowdy affairs and so there should be usherettes at hand to have a quiet word with anybody who steps out of line. I remember going to a Dr Feelgood gig back in the early 80's in some pub on Canvey Island. A bloke got up on stage to sing along and lead singer, the late great Lee Brilluex, headbutted the clown and pushed him off stage. Thats how you fucking handle that! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 Some can't stop themselves from clapping on ALL the beats. For me, I prefer to stay offbeat. It keeps the lemmings nervous. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 Happy clappy Twats. Whats the point in paying to see a show then drowning out the show but clapping like beach load of seals with special needs Even worse are those in the crowd who make those stupid "whoo" noises or whistle in the middle of songs - I've lost count of the number of concerts I've been to where some loudmouth does that. I know its an American thing but its now common over here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cuntspotter Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 What about the fuckers who clap along to the music during ice skating events? Double cunts if you ask me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jiggerycock Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 Has anyone been to a gig and waved their hands in the air like they DID care? Well more fool them! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jiggerycock Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 Anyway you're all cunts and remind me never to go to a gig with you lot. No clapping No singing Basically nothing, which is fine if it's Kraftwerk or some asexual band like The Cure or something. A thousand-yard-stare and the merest flicker of movement is pretty much de rigeur for dealing with those cunts, but it sounds a right barrel of laughs for the rest - apart from hurling sprouts at Tangerine Dream. There's a rock 'n roll story you could dine out on for ever. 'The day I caught Edgar Froese in the nutsack with a Dollys Cabbage' Oh and I actually did hurl bottles of piss at The Tygers of Pan Tang at Reading in the early 80's. Trust me, it was the only way to deal with the horror. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jiggerycock Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 Personally I'm quite the fan of the GG Allin approach. Shit on anyone doing anything you disapprove of - or shit on them anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 there are also the dimbo-clappers. Those who flap-up & clap as soon as the music has stopped, shouting 'YEAH !!!!' and then ducking like a cunt 'coz the song wasn't finished yet and still had two more verses to go. Get a life you sad old fart. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 There is no need to be so rude, and also completely inaccurate and totally incorrect with your futile presuppositions. There is nothing 'sad' about me, lamb-chops, and you would never hear me fart. I just simply follow through upon those that can no more than simply go: Baaa Baaa Baaa Ball bag face. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 ... lamb-chop face.Ball bag face. I've walked into a playground argument, how charming! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 ... lamb-chop face. You are only jealous because I like Card Sin & C-spotter, and not you, not one bit. You are about as attractive as a pair of wet moth wings dangling over cat shit on me front lawn - YOU STINK. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 Care to join in? Oh, how much fun it could be.... Sin Face. I heard the only jazz in your life is the porn magazines that are proping up the corner of your bed, so meeerh! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 and I heard, that the only sin that you have ever done, was to shit in your mothers handbag... So there. Put THAT one in your pipe and smoke it! Fuck it, I am laughing too hard to answer with a quip, I will have to get you in break time after double maths, hmmmn! Think your suggestion is a good idea, I will smoke anything! I am, after all, the founder of the Southern branch of the Black Lung Society. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 One of my funniest, was Tangerine Dream at Fairfield Halls, Croydon. We hired a box for ten of us, and bombarded the cunts with frozen brussles sprouts. They were bouncing off the synth's and the drum kit and everything, making sounds as they hit. The guitarist, even mistook one for an effects peddle, and almost fell arse over tit. The best bit, was the cunts in the box behind us, got thrown out by the roadies... allegedly of course, as I could not possibly ever admit to being a part of such a thing. Tangerine dream are more famous for film music aren't they? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest judgetwi Posted September 15, 2014 Report Share Posted September 15, 2014 Interesting, i made a similar nomination to this called "sing alonga cunts" and every wanker on here called me a decrepid old cunt who needed to fuck off. Funny how times change. Still, don't let me stop you sucking each other off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 16, 2014 Report Share Posted September 16, 2014 My mum used to tap her hand at the same rhythm regardless of whether it was Glen Miller or Paul Gilbert. Silly old bat she was. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jiggerycock Posted September 17, 2014 Report Share Posted September 17, 2014 I just made a remarkable discovery! Val Doonican isn't dead! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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