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AMEX the lying "shop small" cunts


Guest DingTheRioja

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Guest DingTheRioja

So... the cunting yankee bankers set up a "shop small" promotion...

Quite simple, encouraging us all to buy from local, small enterprises instead of the big chains, with a big fuckoff cashback offer of £5 once per retailer on the list, for purchases over £10...

Go on to the Amex shop small website and there is a map to show who is taking part, and where they are, just slap in your postcode and select shops, restaurants etc...

Except the map is shit, it hardly works, only lists 10 at a time, there are 100s within 5 miles of me apparently... this is after the website insisted I was in 1 Whitehall, London at least three fucking times.... and to find the cunts takes ages...

Finally get a list of those shops I'm interested in... go to town..

  • "hi, you in the Shop Small promotion?"
  • "what?"
  • "Shop Small, from Amex, you're on their list for participating"
  • "Sorry, we don't take Amex"
  • "eh?"
  • "we don't take Amex, they're too expensive"
  • "So why the fuck have you got the Amex Shop Small sticker in your window? It's a lovely brand spanking sticker that's obviously only been in the window for 3 weeks, you put it there.."
  • "we don't take Amex"

Went in 6 shops that were on the list...

  • 2 had brand new Shop Small stickers but didn't take Amex, I walked out...
  • 2 didn't have stickers and didn't take amex, I walked out....
  • 2 did take amex, and got business off me.

 

Cunts, fucking cunts, lying scheming smarmy bastard cunts...!!

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Guest Bill Stickers

Sorry but you've got this all backwards.

Only cunts get an Amex card. Delusions of grandeur and exclusivity that anyone can access.

Good on those shops for telling you to fuck off.

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Guest DingTheRioja
1 hour ago, Bill Stickers said:

Sorry but you've got this all backwards.

Only cunts get an Amex card. Delusions of grandeur and exclusivity that anyone can access.

Good on those shops for telling you to fuck off.

It's not mine, it belongs to Mrs D.... :P

 

Decimus...??  I seem to be unable to "like" any of your posts at the moment... have you been piqued in anyway or is this server fucking up?

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4 minutes ago, DingTheDoggie!! said:

It's not mine, it belongs to Mrs D.... :P

 

Decimus...??  I seem to be unable to "like" any of your posts at the moment... have you been piqued in anyway or is this server fucking up?

I'm not sure what's going on, Ding. I can only assume that Mrs. Roops has taken time out of her free-bleeding militant feminism schedule to sabotage my reputation on CC. She's never been a fan...

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21 minutes ago, Decimus said:

I'm not sure what's going on, Ding. I can only assume that Mrs. Roops has taken time out of her free-bleeding militant feminism schedule to sabotage my reputation on CC. She's never been a fan...

You've got her all wrong Deci........oh,hang on a minute.

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1 hour ago, cuntspotter said:

The real irony of this is that there are shops with notices declaring "we do not accept Amex". What the fuck is that all about?

They maybe hate Mexicans and they're a bit dyslexic. 

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Guest Wizardsleeve

All credit card banks are lying, scheming, thieving, pikey fucking cunts.  I'll stick with using the good old reliable GBP notes.  Nothing speaks louder or gets service like cold hard, undeniable cash.  No messing about with service fees, or waiting for your reimbursements, or any other fucking scam the banking cunts have up their dodgy sleeves.  Money talks, and thieving cunts walk, right into a tree chipper.  

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Guest Quincy Cockfingers
5 hours ago, DingTheDoggie!! said:

So... the cunting yankee bankers set up a "shop small" promotion...

Quite simple, encouraging us all to buy from local, small enterprises instead of the big chains, with a big fuckoff cashback offer of £5 once per retailer on the list, for purchases over £10...

Go on to the Amex shop small website and there is a map to show who is taking part, and where they are, just slap in your postcode and select shops, restaurants etc...

Except the map is shit, it hardly works, only lists 10 at a time, there are 100s within 5 miles of me apparently... this is after the website insisted I was in 1 Whitehall, London at least three fucking times.... and to find the cunts takes ages...

Finally get a list of those shops I'm interested in... go to town..

  • "hi, you in the Shop Small promotion?"
  • "what?"
  • "Shop Small, from Amex, you're on their list for participating"
  • "Sorry, we don't take Amex"
  • "eh?"
  • "we don't take Amex, they're too expensive"
  • "So why the fuck have you got the Amex Shop Small sticker in your window? It's a lovely brand spanking sticker that's obviously only been in the window for 3 weeks, you put it there.."
  • "we don't take Amex"

Went in 6 shops that were on the list...

  • 2 had brand new Shop Small stickers but didn't take Amex, I walked out...
  • 2 didn't have stickers and didn't take amex, I walked out....
  • 2 did take amex, and got business off me.

 

Cunts, fucking cunts, lying scheming smarmy bastard cunts...!!

This post is a half baked load of steaming shite and you should hang your fucking head in shame and in actuality.

Maybe they are cunts, just not really enough, and as per the above not in a remotely funny way, so possibly you should start reviewing for Which magazine and make the second consumer test one on the lethality of household bleach. Score a 10 you groaning brain damaged cunt.

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Guest Bill Stickers
1 hour ago, Wizardsleeve said:

All credit card banks are lying, scheming, thieving, pikey fucking cunts.  I'll stick with using the good old reliable GBP notes.  Nothing speaks louder or gets service like cold hard, undeniable cash.  No messing about with service fees, or waiting for your reimbursements, or any other fucking scam the banking cunts have up their dodgy sleeves.  Money talks, and thieving cunts walk, right into a tree chipper.  

Well done on revealing this fascinating insight to us all.

Now all the admin has to do is track down your bedsit using your IP address, lift up your spunky mattress, and steal your life's savings from under it.

Luckily for you he probably wont bother, as your life savings are 67p, a packet of bacon frazzles, and lockets of hair stolen without consent from the few one-night stands you've had in your miserable, sordid excuse of a life.

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Guest Bill Stickers
3 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said:

This post is a half baked load of steaming shite and you should hang your fucking head in shame and in actuality.

Maybe they are cunts, just not really enough, and as per the above not in a remotely funny way, so possibly you should start reviewing for Which magazine and make the second consumer test one on the lethality of household bleach. Score a 10 you groaning brain damaged cunt.

Quincer the Mincer, you fucking cunt. Bleach is no longer the flavour of the month among the Corner's intelligentsia. As a CC trendsetter, I feel obliged to tell you that it is now fashionable to request others put their mouths round leaded tractor diesel exhausts and inhale deeply.

Get with the times, or get sucking on those fumes you insignificant prick.

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Guest Quincy Cockfingers
20 minutes ago, Bill Stickers said:

Quincer the Mincer, you fucking cunt. Bleach is no longer the flavour of the month among the Corner's intelligentsia. As a CC trendsetter, I feel obliged to tell you that it is now fashionable to request others put their mouths round leaded tractor diesel exhausts and inhale deeply.

Get with the times, or get sucking on those fumes you insignificant prick.

Straight Outta Cuntpton!

Automotive fumes are the new black eh? When I was a lad it was all nice bottles of domestos round here. Now it's diesel fumes, darky doctors, fucking such and such...

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Guest Quincy Cockfingers
28 minutes ago, Bill Stickers said:

Well done on revealing this fascinating insight to us all.

Now all the admin has to do is track down your bedsit using your IP address, lift up your spunky mattress, and steal your life's savings from under it.

Luckily for you he probably wont bother, as your life savings are 67p, a packet of bacon frazzles, and lockets of hair stolen without consent from the few one-night stands you've had in your miserable, sordid excuse of a life.

That's it bill, I'll hold him down- you rape him.

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Guest Wizardsleeve
3 hours ago, Bill Stickers said:

Well done on revealing this fascinating insight to us all.

Now all the admin has to do is track down your bedsit using your IP address, lift up your spunky mattress, and steal your life's savings from under it.

Luckily for you he probably wont bother, as your life savings are 67p, a packet of bacon frazzles, and lockets of hair stolen without consent from the few one-night stands you've had in your miserable, sordid excuse of a life.

Bill, I think you're a decent enough bloke, but as you call yourself a trendsetter, I think it important you be told that the trend you are setting is most underwhelming.  You have receded from a semi literate, mostly articulate, sometimes entertaining with a habit of inserting a laugh in your drivel, every so often, to being a complete fuckstick, numb from the neck up, gelatinous fucking turd clogging the loo of life.  Where you would go with the predictable bleach cocktail remark, or the oldie but goodie reference to how I might commit suicide, I shall offer you something more constructive, that's advice that you can use for self improvement....take the next 4 weeks off.  Just do something you've always wanted to do, but couldn't get off your fat arse long enough to explore for fear of missing something posted here.  Those Cheeto's will still be there, the KFC has a shelf life of 12 years, and the asian ladyboy you pay to talk dirty to you will understand.  Charge up your mobility scooter, and let the landlord in to fumigate your bedsit, put in new carpets, after a hazmat team removes your shit and semen crusted current flooring, and step outside and get some fresh air, and maybe a ray or two of sunshine.  In January, after you've depressingly scraped by another lonely holiday, come back as the Bill we all got to know when you joined.   Off you go, there's a good lad!  

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Guest DingTheRioja
10 hours ago, Quincy Cockfingers said:

This post is a half baked load of steaming shite and you should hang your fucking head in shame and in actuality.

Maybe they are cunts, just not really enough, and as per the above not in a remotely funny way, so possibly you should start reviewing for Which magazine and make the second consumer test one on the lethality of household bleach. Score a 10 you groaning brain damaged cunt.

Bleach? How original... I am starting to think that Herr Hitlers' scientist were almost right, there is an "untermenschen"... they just got it wrong as to who they were...

10 hours ago, Bill Stickers said:

Well done on revealing this fascinating insight to us all.

Now all the admin has to do is track down your bedsit using your IP address, lift up your spunky mattress, and steal your life's savings from under it.

Luckily for you he probably wont bother, as your life savings are 67p, a packet of bacon frazzles, and lockets of hair stolen without consent from the few one-night stands you've had in your miserable, sordid excuse of a life.

The police aren't calling them "one-night stands"....

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Guest Quincy Cockfingers
6 hours ago, Wizardsleeve said:

Bill, I think you're a decent enough bloke, but as you call yourself a trendsetter, I think it important you be told that the trend you are setting is most underwhelming.  You have receded from a semi literate, mostly articulate, sometimes entertaining with a habit of inserting a laugh in your drivel, every so often, to being a complete fuckstick, numb from the neck up, gelatinous fucking turd clogging the loo of life.  Where you would go with the predictable bleach cocktail remark, or the oldie but goodie reference to how I might commit suicide, I shall offer you something more constructive, that's advice that you can use for self improvement....take the next 4 weeks off.  Just do something you've always wanted to do, but couldn't get off your fat arse long enough to explore for fear of missing something posted here.  Those Cheeto's will still be there, the KFC has a shelf life of 12 years, and the asian ladyboy you pay to talk dirty to you will understand.  Charge up your mobility scooter, and let the landlord in to fumigate your bedsit, put in new carpets, after a hazmat team removes your shit and semen crusted current flooring, and step outside and get some fresh air, and maybe a ray or two of sunshine.  In January, after you've depressingly scraped by another lonely holiday, come back as the Bill we all got to know when you joined.   Off you go, there's a good lad!  

 

3 minutes ago, DingTheDoggie!! said:

Bleach? How original... I am starting to think that Herr Hitlers' scientist were almost right, there is an "untermenschen"... they just got it wrong as to who they were...

The police aren't calling them "one-night stands"....

Feeble, limp wristed shite. You should have quit when you were already very far behind, now you've conspired to make yourself look like an absolute fucking cunt.

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Guest Quincy Cockfingers
7 hours ago, Wizardsleeve said:

Bill, I think you're a decent enough bloke, but as you call yourself a trendsetter, I think it important you be told that the trend you are setting is most underwhelming.  You have receded from a semi literate, mostly articulate, sometimes entertaining with a habit of inserting a laugh in your drivel, every so often, to being a complete fuckstick, numb from the neck up, gelatinous fucking turd clogging the loo of life.  Where you would go with the predictable bleach cocktail remark, or the oldie but goodie reference to how I might commit suicide, I shall offer you something more constructive, that's advice that you can use for self improvement....take the next 4 weeks off.  Just do something you've always wanted to do, but couldn't get off your fat arse long enough to explore for fear of missing something posted here.  Those Cheeto's will still be there, the KFC has a shelf life of 12 years, and the asian ladyboy you pay to talk dirty to you will understand.  Charge up your mobility scooter, and let the landlord in to fumigate your bedsit, put in new carpets, after a hazmat team removes your shit and semen crusted current flooring, and step outside and get some fresh air, and maybe a ray or two of sunshine.  In January, after you've depressingly scraped by another lonely holiday, come back as the Bill we all got to know when you joined.   Off you go, there's a good lad!  

Mister Sleeve, please have some consideration- It's a Saturday morning and some of us are dealing with clanging hangovers and worse, and I'm faced with this story shite to wade through.

It was with a terrible sinking feeling that I clocked the great block of text after your name, probably what "going over the top" was like, or worse. In fact, half way through, I'd wished I'd been mustard gassed and drowned in mud instead.

Its not that it's even that shite, in fact it has a lot to commend it - it's got suicide suggestions, bleach, spunk stains, kfc (which is for some reason inherently funny), ladyboys. 

Rather that the presentation is what id expect from a fairly thick, ugly, unliked 11year old. For fucks sake you cunt try to break it up a little to make it half digestible, for as it stands it's like being presented with a wheelbarrow full of dog shite and a teaspoon. 

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If this is just another meeting of the Bill Stickers booster club, I think I will just fuck off and do something useful. I may nip into town and buy him a Christmas present. I have seen a lovely Mattel, play in the bath toaster with a lovely poisonous, lead based paint finish and extra asbestos lining. Made in China of course.

Or a hoverboard and a dodgy bus timetable.

Or fuck all like everyone else because no fucker can stand the odious cunt

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