Decimus Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 With the proliferation of feminazi propaganda labeling every man as a potential rapist, there are more grotesquely ugly and obese tarts than ever labouring under the delusion that the mere sight of their corpulent calves is enough to make them a high risk target for predatory perverts. After sinking a few in my local last Sunday, I decided to abandon my usual drink driving routine and pound the pavement home on shanks pony. Twenty or so paces in front of me on an otherwise deserted road, I spied the cetacean shaped form of a woman waddling along on her trotters. Within two minutes of walking she had nervously turned her head and chins back towards me with a startled look on her fat fucking jowly face at least ten times. Obviously deciding that as a man I was more of a risk than a potentially lethal heart attack, said chubber upped her pace to a speedy trot and took a swift left. Unfortunately for our husky heroine, that was also my way home. The look on her moon face as I rounded the corner plainly said that she thought I was going to imminently make an assault on her swollen sugar puff. I'm not sure what I'm more offended about. Being considered as a potential rapist, or the arrogance of the fat cunt that, even after sinking eight pints, she thought I'd be able to raise a hardon for such a disgusting fucking specimen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 31 minutes ago, Decimus said: ..................... I'm not sure what I'm more offended about. Being considered as a potential rapist, or the arrogance of the fat cunt that, even after sinking eight pints, she thought I'd be able to raise a hardon for such a disgusting fucking specimen. Hope you were wearing a hoodie... and pulled it over your head when you went round that corner.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Manky Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 Porkers who deludedly think every man wants to maul their gash. Sad cunts. If the fat cunts lost a hundredweight or two then maybe they would avoid having these strange fantasies. I always try to reassure them by walking silently up behind them and gently icking their necks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 Chicago's I presume? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 Good to see you posting again, Decs. I wonder how long this thread has before the kebab cruncher turns up to slate it as picking on an easy target? Ahh, who cares, he's a cunt, so are the pachyderms you are referring to. Disgusting creatures whose perspiration fountains eat through the fucking pavement, which WE have to pay to replace. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 1 hour ago, Decimus said: With the proliferation of feminazi propaganda labeling every man as a potential rapist, there are more grotesquely ugly and obese tarts than ever labouring under the delusion that the mere sight of their corpulent calves is enough to make them a high risk target for predatory perverts. After sinking a few in my local last Sunday, I decided to abandon my usual drink driving routine and pound the pavement home on shanks pony. Twenty or so paces in front of me on an otherwise deserted road, I spied the cetacean shaped form of a woman waddling along on her trotters. Within two minutes of walking she had nervously turned her head and chins back towards me with a startled look on her fat fucking jowly face at least ten times. Obviously deciding that as a man I was more of a risk than a potentially lethal heart attack, said chubber upped her pace to a speedy trot and took a swift left. Unfortunately for our husky heroine, that was also my way home. The look on her moon face as I rounded the corner plainly said that she thought I was going to imminently make an assault on her swollen sugar puff. I'm not sure what I'm more offended about. Being considered as a potential rapist, or the arrogance of the fat cunt that, even after sinking eight pints, she thought I'd be able to raise a hardon for such a disgusting fucking specimen. Where did you bury the body Decs? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 5, 2016 Author Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 Just now, camberwell gypsy said: Where did you bury the body Decs? The Mariana Trench. The only place deep enough to fully submerge its ample frame. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 1 minute ago, Decimus said: The Mariana Trench. The only place deep enough to fully submerge its ample frame. How did you overcome its aircraft carrier-like buoyancy?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 6 minutes ago, Decimus said: The Mariana Trench. The only place deep enough to fully submerge its ample frame. What did you use to weigh the body down so it wouldn't resurface? The spiteful cunt would, you know! That's just how they are. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 Would be interesting to see the figures on fat vs thin rape victims. If I were a rapalist, I would be out looking for a right little sort who would leave fond memories for the wank bank, while I sit in prison. If you're going to steal a car, it might as well be a Ferrari. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 5, 2016 Author Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 8 minutes ago, Ape said: How did you overcome its aircraft carrier-like buoyancy?! 3 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said: What did you use to weigh the body down so it wouldn't resurface? The spiteful cunt would, you know! That's just how they are. Sadly that was a problem I could not completely overcome. The Isle of Mann is actually her right arse cheek and Manhattan island her left. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 Just now, Decimus said: Sadly that was a problem I could not completely overcome. The Isle of Mann is actually her right arse cheek and Manhattan island her left. I suppose bathers around the world should thank you for chumming the White Sharks out of their swimming areas. I just pity the poor cunts being lured to something so unhealthy. Sharks may be predisposed to avoiding cancer, but clogged arteries and heart disease, no real data is available. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JackoTC Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 1 hour ago, Decimus said: With the proliferation of feminazi propaganda labeling every man as a potential rapist, there are more grotesquely ugly and obese tarts than ever labouring under the delusion that the mere sight of their corpulent calves is enough to make them a high risk target for predatory perverts. After sinking a few in my local last Sunday, I decided to abandon my usual drink driving routine and pound the pavement home on shanks pony. Twenty or so paces in front of me on an otherwise deserted road, I spied the cetacean shaped form of a woman waddling along on her trotters. Within two minutes of walking she had nervously turned her head and chins back towards me with a startled look on her fat fucking jowly face at least ten times. Obviously deciding that as a man I was more of a risk than a potentially lethal heart attack, said chubber upped her pace to a speedy trot and took a swift left. Unfortunately for our husky heroine, that was also my way home. The look on her moon face as I rounded the corner plainly said that she thought I was going to imminently make an assault on her swollen sugar puff. I'm not sure what I'm more offended about. Being considered as a potential rapist, or the arrogance of the fat cunt that, even after sinking eight pints, she thought I'd be able to raise a hardon for such a disgusting fucking specimen. A vile, shit for brained nom if I've ever heard one. How do you know that her inbred Norfolk husband or father hadn't raped and beaten her endlessly over many years, causing her to have little self esteem, and lead to her over eating. You are not funny Deco. More contrived shit that you probably spent an hour writing in the hope of getting more likes to keep ahead in your little popularity contest - go fuck yourself, wanker. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 18 minutes ago, Decimus said: The Mariana Trench. The only place deep enough to fully submerge its ample frame. Christ Decs, there was a small sunami in Sumatra because of that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 5, 2016 Author Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 2 minutes ago, JackoTC said: A vile, shit for brained nom if I've ever heard one. How do you know that her inbred Norfolk husband or father hadn't raped and beaten her endlessly over many years, causing her to have little self esteem, and lead to her over eating. You are not funny Deco. More contrived shit that you probably spent an hour writing in the hope of getting more likes to keep ahead in your little popularity contest - go fuck yourself, wanker. Dear oh dear. A pale imitation of Frank, is this what you have descended to Jackers? At least when you were pretending to be a chronic alcoholic you raised the odd chuckle, along with my hopes that you'd die a painfully cirrhotic death. Time to give up the ghost you sad, middle aged Jock cunt. You just don't cut it anymore. Sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JackoTC Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 Just liked that for you Deco. I know that's what you strive for. To be liked on a website full of cunts. Lol Lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JackoTC Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 I've just given you 8 likes - I'll make sure you get ten likes a day from me from now on to keep your levels up. Then you can buy yourself a trophy at the end of the year and award it to yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JackoTC Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 By shoving it up your unfunny student arsehole lol lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decimus Posted February 5, 2016 Author Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 17 minutes ago, JackoTC said: AIvile, shit for brained nom if I've ever heard one. How do you know that her inbred Norfolk husband or father hadn't raped and beaten her endlessly over many years, causing her to have little self esteem, and lead to her over eating. You are not funny Deco. More contrived shit that you probably spent an hour writing in the hope of getting more likes to keep ahead in your little popularity contest - go fuck yourself, wanker. 6 minutes ago, JackoTC said: I've just given you 8 likes - I'll make sure you get ten likes a day from me from now on to keep your levels up. Then you can buy yourself a trophy at the end of the year and award it to yourself. 6 minutes ago, JackoTC said: By shoving it up your unfunny student arsehole lol lol. Fuck me. You've gone full Jazz in less than 20 minutes, a new record. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 2 hours ago, deebom said: Would be interesting to see the figures on fat vs thin rape victims. If I were a rapalist, I would be out looking for a right little sort who would leave fond memories for the wank bank, while I sit in prison. If you're going to steal a car, it might as well be a Ferrari. A point I often notice on the news, whenever some teen girl "goes missing" and is inevitably found in the woods or some canal, they're always pretty... never noticed a fat ugly biffer yet... Bit like that dozy bint trying to get the washing machine excuse out for £33 million... well... it's better than stealing £23.72 from the charity tin.... 2 hours ago, JackoTC said: Just liked that for you Deco. I know that's what you strive for. To be liked on a website full of cunts. Lol Lol. 2 hours ago, JackoTC said: By shoving it up your unfunny student arsehole lol lol. Fuck off Frank/Punkape/etc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank Posted February 5, 2016 Report Share Posted February 5, 2016 2 hours ago, JackoTC said: I've just given you 8 likes - I'll make sure you get ten likes a day from me from now on to keep your levels up. Then you can buy yourself a trophy at the end of the year and award it to yourself. Jackie?.. opera not so good? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Wizardsleeve Posted February 6, 2016 Report Share Posted February 6, 2016 Fuck off, Frank! Next time you bugger old Jacko, use some lube, you cheap poof. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted February 6, 2016 Report Share Posted February 6, 2016 15 hours ago, neil298 said: Chicago's I presume? Dunno, what's its IP address again? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted February 6, 2016 Report Share Posted February 6, 2016 16 hours ago, Decimus said: ...make an assault on her swollen sugar puff. What a disturbing metaphor. I will doubtless be pursued by a tumescent Honey Monster in my nightmares tonight. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frank Posted February 6, 2016 Report Share Posted February 6, 2016 3 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said: What a disturbing metaphor. I will doubtless be pursued by a tumescent Honey Monster in my nightmares tonight. That's exactly how I imagine Gyppo looks after being gifted a couple of scratch cards. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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