Ape™️ Posted February 13, 2016 Author Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 2 minutes ago, deebom said: Only one nutter Ape? You should visit Lewisham some day. It's full of crazy Rastas talking to God, Twitching, dribbling junkies asking for Rizla, and bi-polar loons walking around shouting. It's a given, with Gloucester, that there were plenty of 'em around bomber, but this one stood out from the "normal" nutters with his unique style. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 We have a bloke round my way with tourettes who shouts "You fucking cunts" every time he sees anything yellow. Most entertaining in the local shops when he is near the fruit and veg aisle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 13 minutes ago, Alfie Noakes said: We have a bloke round my way with tourettes who shouts "You fucking cunts" every time he sees anything yellow. Most entertaining in the local shops when he is near the fruit and veg aisle. Or in your local Chinese restaurant. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 14 minutes ago, Alfie Noakes said: We have a bloke round my way with tourettes who shouts "You fucking cunts" every time he sees anything yellow. Most entertaining in the local shops when he is near the fruit and veg aisle. There's a Uni near me that is mostly packed with gooks. He should take a look around campus. He'd have a fucking field day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest deebom Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 1 hour ago, Ape said: It's a given, with Gloucester, that there were plenty of 'em around bomber, but this one stood out from the "normal" nutters with his unique style. I actually know Gloucester quite well, my aunt lived in Quedgley for years, she now lives in Wotton Under Edge. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 44 minutes ago, Alfie Noakes said: We have a bloke round my way with tourettes who shouts "You fucking cunts" every time he sees anything yellow. Most entertaining in the local shops when he is near the fruit and veg aisle. Next time you see him, slip a bunch of daffodils in his trolley. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 1 hour ago, nobgobbler said: Next time you see him, slip a bunch of daffodils in his trolley. Is that code for up the wrong 'un? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nocti Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 7 minutes ago, MikeD said: Is that code for up the wrong 'un? Everything is code for up the wrong 'un Mike. Have you ever heard Julian Clary talk for more than ten seconds? Fucking difficult without smashing the telly, but it's an education at least. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 2 minutes ago, nocti said: Everything is code for up the wrong 'un Mike. Have you ever heard Julian Clary talk for more than ten seconds? Fucking difficult without smashing the telly, but it's an education at least. Thank fuck for that, I thought it was just me! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 14 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said: Remember Anderton. Big bastard with big beard. Working class background. Probably no stranger to ramming faces into cell walls. You mean proper Policing. 14 hours ago, cuntspotter said: Yes... He had a think about homosexuals "swirling around in a cess pool of their own making". Sounded like a bit of a fucking oddie to me. The Old Bill an Oddie? A Bill Oddie? I'll get my truncheon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 13 hours ago, nobgobbler said: Witnessing public wanking is a cunt. I once saw a dirty old cunt do it in the acute assessment unit in the hospital. As if I wasn't fucking ill enough already. I saw a bloke in a clothes shop pulling one off the dirty cunt. I fucking hate mirrors. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 3 hours ago, MikeD said: Is that code for up the wrong 'un? I'm worried now. Mr gobbler just asked me if I fancy a bunch of lilies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 42 minutes ago, nobgobbler said: I'm worried now. Mr gobbler just asked me if I fancy a bunch of lilies. Stop your fucking moaning, at least he asked. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 3 minutes ago, MikeD said: Stop your fucking moaning, at least he asked. And was preprepared to buy fucking flowers. The poof. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 6 minutes ago, MikeD said: Stop your fucking moaning, at least he asked. He did. I forgot my place there for a minute. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 8 minutes ago, nobgobbler said: He did. I forgot my place there for a minute. No problem. Now, if you remember the directions to the kitchen, off you go. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 2 minutes ago, MikeD said: No problem. Now, if you remember the directions to the kitchen, off you go. Can I get you anything? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest MikeD Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 Just now, nobgobbler said: Can I get you anything? You seem to have remembered your place, that'll do for now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Witheredscrote Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 Beat this cunts. Today in the little town of Le Dorat ( near me ) a Frenchman was bathing in the market square fountain , AND he was using SOAP . What a Gallic nutter . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 16 minutes ago, witheredscrote said: Beat this cunts. Today in the little town of Le Dorat ( near me ) a Frenchman was bathing in the market square fountain , AND he was using SOAP . What a Gallic nutter . Garlic butter? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Alfie Noakes Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 1 hour ago, witheredscrote said: Beat this cunts. Today in the little town of Le Dorat ( near me ) a Frenchman was bathing in the market square fountain , AND he was using SOAP . What a Gallic nutter . Frenchman using soap! It must have been mistaken identity, a tourist perhaps? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted February 13, 2016 Report Share Posted February 13, 2016 On 12 February 2016 at 1:37 PM, Ape said: Had to go into Gloucester today, a wretched hive of scum and villainy at the best of times, and was confronted by a total fucking nutter who started shouting "basmati rice" at me! He hadn't singled me out for any special attention as he proceeded to yell it at a number of other people. There's generally a nutter or two milling about in most town centres, and generally they are harmless. This cunt was actually quite aggressive and either needed his medication or locking in a padded cell. Did he shout "poppadum" and " naan bread" at you aswell ? You could have retorted by shouting "bombay duck" or "bindi bhajii". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted February 14, 2016 Report Share Posted February 14, 2016 On 12 February 2016 at 10:28 PM, Manky said: I didn't think it was. Some of our nutters are absolute stars. I remember a multi millionaire ( through graft, not inheritance ) sleeping in the gardens with all the tramps. When the bill arrived to move them all on, he led a charge by tramps, homeless and one millionaire against the forces of law and order. As they were all pissed as cunts on cheap cider they were all locked up in 5 seconds flat. He got a ten quid fine and bound over for 12 months. He also paid the fines of all the other miscreants, in cash, out of his wallet. He had started the evening off at a charity do sat next to Gods copper, Sir James Anderton who was Chief Constable of Greater Manchester Police. Proper northern nutter. Great bloke, still see him around the pubs. Anderton.Good man. He described AIDS victims as swimming is a cesspool of their own making in the 80's.( or Barrymore's pool). That might get him an invite to the Furys for a house party today. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted February 14, 2016 Report Share Posted February 14, 2016 23 hours ago, nobgobbler said: Witnessing public wanking is a cunt. I once saw a dirty old cunt do it in the acute assessment unit in the hospital. As if I wasn't fucking ill enough already. We had some dirty old fucker who used to come into to the A&E where I used to work in and wank off in the cubicles. Dirty disgusting cunt. That's fucking consultant cardiologists for you. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted February 14, 2016 Report Share Posted February 14, 2016 9 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said: We had some dirty old fucker who used to come into to the A&E where I used to work in and wank off in the cubicles. Dirty disgusting cunt. That's fucking consultant cardiologists for you. I bet gynaecologists do it all the time. Have you noticed that all gynaeos are men? Never trust anyone who decides at the age of 14 they want to be a professional muff raider. The consulting room should be renamed -- wank bank. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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