Bubba C Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 Just now, Punkape said: Ask Ape. If they do you can dress the child like an oik. As an oik, no? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 2 minutes ago, Bubbles said: Shit. It's a fucking good one, though. Indeed - I couldn't think of a better one to christen Scotty's thread. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 Just now, Bubbles said: As an oik, no? Or a chav. whilst you're there get Mrs Ape some fresh knickers for herself and a butternut squash for her to ram up Ape. lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 1 minute ago, Punkape said: Or a chav. whilst you're there get Mrs Ape some fresh knickers for herself and a butternut squash for her to ram up Ape. lol. I'd never shop there. I'm a cunt, not a lower-class scallywag. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 5 minutes ago, Punkape said: Or a chav. whilst you're there get Mrs Ape some fresh knickers for herself and a butternut squash for her to ram up Ape. lol. I see you're stuck in the Tesco subroutine again, you useless piece of binary shit. Lol. Lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earl of Punkape Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 Just now, Ape said: I see you're stuck in the Tesco subroutine again, you useless piece of binary shit. Lol. Lol. The vast majority of your posts are about me ! I think you love Tesco and its "natural informality" Lol. You're stalking me again weirdo. lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 19 minutes ago, Punkape said: The vast majority of your posts are about me ! I think you love Tesco and its "natural informality" Lol. You're stalking me again weirdo. lol No Spunky, I'm not stalking you - I just can't resist commenting on the ceaseless stream of utter shit that flows so effortlessly from you. You're light entertainment. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted March 31, 2016 Author Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 I caught my neighbours as they were getting into their airport taxi, and gave their 12 year old daughter a 50 euro note. "Here you are sweetheart," I said. "A bit of extra spending money for your holiday." As she beamed and hugged me, her mother wiped away a tear and mumbled a thank you. Her dad clasped my arm and said "thanks mate, that's very kind of you, I really appreciate it." Nice couple, but they've got a lot to learn about grooming. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 First thing this morning, there was a tap on my door. My plumber has got a funny sense of humour. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 5 minutes ago, Bubbles said: First thing this morning, there was a tap on my door. My plumber has got a funny sense of humour. He was probably trying to get out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 1 minute ago, Quincy Cockfingers said: He was probably trying to get out. Fuck off, Quincy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 4 minutes ago, Bubbles said: Fuck off, Quincy. Cunt up, spunk breather. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 6 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said: Cunt up, spunk breather. Fuck off, Bill. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 2 minutes ago, Bubbles said: Fuck off, Bill. Bill off, fuck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 5 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said: Bill off, fuck. Fuck Bill, off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 1 minute ago, Bubbles said: Fuck Bill, off. I'm going to Kill Bill! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 Just now, Quincy Cockfingers said: I'm going to Kill Bill! Can you fuck Frank off too? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 1 minute ago, Quincy Cockfingers said: I'm going to Kill Bill! He's just trying to cunt me next door. Fucking it up obviously but it's unusual for the weasel. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Quincy Cockfingers Posted March 31, 2016 Report Share Posted March 31, 2016 6 minutes ago, Quincy Cockfingers said: He's just trying to cunt me next door. Fucking it up obviously but it's unusual for the weasel. Laters you cunts, early shit themorra. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted April 1, 2016 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2016 My girlfriend thinks I'm stalking her. Well, she's not exactly my girlfriend yet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted April 1, 2016 Report Share Posted April 1, 2016 1 minute ago, scotty said: My girlfriend thinks I'm stalking her. Well, she's not exactly my girlfriend yet. You are single mindedly determined to keep this thread alive Scotters. Anyway I phoned up work this morning to tell them I was not coming in due to sickness......oh aye said the manager, just how sick are you? Well I'm still in bed with my daughter I replied. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted April 1, 2016 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2016 1 minute ago, luke swarm said: You are single mindedly determined to keep this thread alive Scotters. Anyway I phoned up work this morning to tell them I was not coming in due to sickness......oh aye said the manager, just how sick are you? Well I'm still in bed with my daughter I replied. Luke, this stuff needs to be preserved for posterity. There's nowhere more appropriate than here, and bubbles is doing his level best as well. Oddly enough, I phoned my boss as well this morning to say I couldn't come in as I had to take my cat to the vet. "Pull the other one," he snapped, "why can't your wife do it?" I said "because it's not her cock it's stuck on." 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted April 1, 2016 Report Share Posted April 1, 2016 Just now, scotty said: Luke, this stuff needs to be preserved for posterity. There's nowhere more appropriate than here, and bubbles is doing his level best as well. Oddly enough, I phoned my boss as well this morning to say I couldn't come in as I had to take my cat to the vet. "Pull the other one," he snapped, "why can't your wife do it?" I said "because it's not her cock it's stuck on." Nice one, it made me spill my tea....I was actually told this by a girl in the office a couple of years ago. How do you know if your sister is having her period............your Dads cock tastes funny again. I nearly passed out with pleasure when she delivered the punch line as she was extremely shagtastic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba C Posted April 1, 2016 Report Share Posted April 1, 2016 19 minutes ago, scotty said: Luke, this stuff needs to be preserved for posterity. There's nowhere more appropriate than here, and bubbles is doing his level best as well. Tell that to Bawsy, the joke-stealing swine..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted April 1, 2016 Author Report Share Posted April 1, 2016 29 minutes ago, luke swarm said: Nice one, it made me spill my tea....I was actually told this by a girl in the office a couple of years ago. How do you know if your sister is having her period............your Dads cock tastes funny again. I nearly passed out with pleasure when she delivered the punch line as she was extremely shagtastic. I love when birds talk filthy. Where's roops when you need her? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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