Pancake Day

[Bubba C]

Marketed by tossers, to tossers, with every northern shit hole probably having a treat in the form of some disgusting bottle-ready batter mix. 

 

Fuck off. 

[Decimus]

@DingTheRioja please give up breathing for Lent. Failing that, Don't log onto CC until it's over. Cunt.

[Cuntybaws]

30 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

Marketed by tossers, to tossers, with every northern shit hole probably having a treat in the form of some disgusting bottle-ready batter mix. 

I might ordinarily have risked a reference to the battered pissflaps of a distaff relative of a fellow member, but such a reference now lies stillborn on my tongue.

[Guest Alfie Noakes]

3 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said:

I might ordinarily have risked a reference to the battered pissflaps of a distaff relative of a fellow member, but such a reference now lies stillborn on my tongue.

They got to you in the cooler, didn't they?

[Cuntybaws]

4 minutes ago, Alfie Noakes said:

They got to you in the cooler, didn't they?

On the plus side, with nothing else to do, I managed to beat my previous record of 38 year's standing for the most number of wanks in a weekend.

[Guest Alfie Noakes]

1 minute ago, Cuntybaws said:

On the plus side, with nothing else to do, I managed to beat my previous record of 38 year's standing for the most number of wanks in a weekend.

I wonder if you got close to niel's record?

[Neil]

15 minutes ago, Alfie Noakes said:

I wonder if you got close to niel's record?

I was popping out dust after no 17

[Guest DingTheRioja]

15 minutes ago, Alfie Noakes said:

I wonder if you got close to niel's record?

Isn't 38 just warm-ups for Neil?

 

@Decimus remember when you turn on the gas to make your pancakes, please forget to light it for half an hour or so...?

[Guest Alfie Noakes]

4 minutes ago, Neil said:

I was popping out dust after no 17

I find it all gets a bit bruised and sore after 12. Also ends up like wrestling with a wet rolled up flannel.

[Decimus]

Just now, DingTheRioja said:

Isn't 38 just warm-ups for Neil?

 

@Decimus remember when you turn on the gas to make your pancakes, please forget to light it for half an hour or so...?

Ding, please stop name dropping me in every single one of your posts. It's getting embarrassing now. 

Thanks x

[Guest DingTheRioja]

20 minutes ago, Decimus said:

Ding, please stop name dropping me in every single one of your posts. It's getting embarrassing now. 

Thanks x

I've  name dropped you in, oh, maybe 3 posts in the last two weeks?

But you've mentioned me at least 3 times a day....you useless cunt.

[Decimus]

1 minute ago, DingTheRioja said:

I've  name dropped you in, oh, maybe 3 posts in the last two weeks?

But you've mentioned me at least 3 times a day....you useless cunt.

Irony, another one of the many facets of humour that Ding doesn't understand.

Idiot.

[Stubby Pecker]

1 hour ago, Bubba C said:

Marketed by tossers, to tossers, with every northern shit hole probably having a treat in the form of some disgusting bottle-ready batter mix. 

 

Fuck off. 

Sorry to drag this back on topic away from the important issues of record book wanking sessions and the inevitable, but necessary, slagging of ding, but pancake day is not a cunt. Agreed, the ready made mixtures are and the northern peasants who are too lazy to use the milk, eggs and flour every household always had in stock. 

My kids have just pissed themselves watching their inept dad flipping and breaking every cunting one. They were bloody nice though with black current jam. 

Fuck off bubba you 'wrong side of offas dyke' dwelling cunt.

 

[Guest Drew P Pissflaps]

35 minutes ago, DingTheRioja said:

Isn't 38 just warm-ups for Neil?

 

@Decimus remember when you turn on the gas to make your pancakes, please forget to light it for half an hour or so...?

Thanks to his webbed appendages brought about by a couple of generations of limited gene mixing, they call him 'pancake hands'. It's why he hates Shrove Tuesday. 

[Stubby Pecker]

8 minutes ago, DingTheRioja said:

I've  name dropped you in, oh, maybe 3 posts in the last two weeks?

But you've mentioned me at least 3 times a day....you useless cunt.

I'd like to drop you pair of cunts. From a chinook into the sea.

[Decimus]

10 minutes ago, Drew P Pissflaps said:

Thanks to his webbed appendages brought about by a couple of generations of limited gene mixing, they call him 'pancake hands'. It's why he hates Shrove Tuesday. 

Drew, I can imagine you silently seething over my recent comments towards you. Sobbing hard as you furiously masturbate over a picture of a 'Childline' Esther Rantzen poster, screaming "Who will save the children, somebody please save the fucking children!"

Fuck off, Pudsey cunt.

[Bubba C]

1 hour ago, Cuntybaws said:

On the plus side, with nothing else to do, I managed to beat my previous record of 38 year's standing for the most number of wanks in a weekend.

I normally conduct mine whilst sitting down. 

 

Come back, MikefuckingD, all is forgiven. 

[Bubba C]

35 minutes ago, DingTheRioja said:

I've  name dropped you in, oh, maybe 3 posts in the last two weeks?

But you've mentioned me at least 3 times a day....you useless cunt.

I've reported you for not making a single on-topic post, and stop bullying Decs, you autistic faggot. 

[Guest DingTheRioja]

7 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

I've reported you for not making a single on-topic post, and stop bullying Decs, you autistic faggot. 

How shit of you.  I mentioned pancakes earlier.

Prick.

[Decimus]

4 minutes ago, Bubba C said:

I've reported you for not making a single on-topic post, and stop bullying Decs, you autistic faggot. 

When I sleep, I have a recurring nightmare. A dilapidated, anthropomorphic caravan, emblazoned with racist paraphernalia chases me through the streets of a northern shanty town. I can hear heavy breathing as it gains on me, and the rumble of its engine sounds uncannily like Geoffrey Boycott screaming "Eh up, it's me, Ding, giz a kiss ya big titted slag. I'm fookin' gorgeous me, like a young fookin' Burt Reynolds".

[Guest DingTheRioja]

41 minutes ago, Decimus said:

Irony, another one of the many facets of humour that Ding doesn't understand.

Idiot.

That was irony was it?

Looked more like shit to me, like everything you post.

[Ape™️]

 

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

1 hour ago, Cuntybaws said:

On the plus side, with nothing else to do, I managed to beat my previous record of 38 year's standing for the most number of wanks in a weekend.

That sounds like a direct challenge to Niel, Baws!  

[Guest Drew P Pissflaps]

36 minutes ago, Decimus said:

When I sleep, I have a recurring nightmare. A dilapidated, anthropomorphic caravan, emblazoned with racist paraphernalia chases me through the streets of a northern shanty town. I can hear heavy breathing as it gains on me, and the rumble of its engine sounds uncannily like Geoffrey Boycott screaming "Eh up, it's me, Ding, giz a kiss ya big titted slag. I'm fookin' gorgeous me, like a young fookin' Burt Reynolds".

A caravan with an engine?? Do you have much experience of the world outside?

[Decimus]

14 minutes ago, Drew P Pissflaps said:

A caravan with an engine?? Do you have much experience of the world outside?

Yes, because that was the least realistic part of my analogy. Boy have I got egg on my face now. 

Just out of interest, what branch of Kwik Fit do you clean floors at? I could do with a comprehensive education on motor vehicles.

Stupid cunt.