People Who Use Speed Control

[Guest Wizardsleeve]

Fuck me, am I alone in getting trapped behind these cunts or feeling their numbers are on the rise?  A roadway meant for higher speeds gets clogged by these fucking cunts like a toilet at a cheese factory. They have absolutely no clue that they are causing collisions, buggering traffic for miles behind them or to get out of the fucking way to let others overtake. 

The government should deploy armoured vehicles with 30mm machine guns and cut these oblivious ducklings to ribbons!!

[camberwell gypsy]

On the other side of the coin; coming back down the motorway today, some cunt in a black Porsche came hurtling down the inside lane, undertaking, swerving across each lane doing at least 95mph, and flashing cars in the fast lane because they were holding him up. So it was great to get to the services to see the greasy cunt being booked by the traffic cops. Going as fast as he was he'd probably get a lengthy ban. 

[Guest DingTheRioja]

42 minutes ago, Wizardsleeve said:

 

The government should deploy armoured vehicles with 30mm machine guns and cut these oblivious ducklings to ribbons!!

Volunteering for driving duty,Sir!

[Wolfie]

Oh, they most definitely cause accidents by frustrating other road users into taking greater risks. That said, some people are just plain thick and can't land a good job because they have no qualifications, and consequently can only afford shitty, rusty French cars which can't even make the speed limit going down a bloody hill. While Pantysniffer isn't a particularly knowledgeable chap, I'll wager he's a world authority on this particular subject.

[Wolfie]

4 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said:

On the other side of the coin; coming back down the motorway today, some cunt in a black Porsche came hurtling down the inside lane, undertaking, swerving across each lane doing at least 95mph, and flashing cars in the fast lane because they were holding him up. So it was great to get to the services to see the greasy cunt being booked by the traffic cops. Going as fast as he was he'd probably get a lengthy ban. 

So that's why Punkers has been quiet today. He must've decided to leave his Range Rover at home and take the Porsche. 

(Btw: the fact the Porsche was 'black' has no relevance. Reported for racism.)

[camberwell gypsy]

14 minutes ago, Wolfie said:

So that's why Punkers has been quiet today. He must've decided to leave his Range Rover at home and take the Porsche. 

(Btw: the fact the Porsche was 'black' has no relevance. Reported for racism.)

Good. I need a rest 

[Eric Cuntman]

I can't understand cunts who stay in the left hand lane of slip roads and then launch themselves over to the right just before joining the motorway, in fact if they made all slip roads single lane, it would eliminate the problem and the dawdlers wouldn't be able to cut up drivers who are travelling at an appropriate speed to safely join a 70mph road, and people who don't move into the fast lane when approaching a slip road exit are cunts as well.

[Wolfie]

44 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I can't understand cunts who stay in the left hand lane of slip roads and then launch themselves over to the right just before joining the motorway, in fact if they made all slip roads single lane, it would eliminate the problem and the dawdlers wouldn't be able to cut up drivers who are travelling at an appropriate speed to safely join a 70mph road, and people who don't move into the fast lane when approaching a slip road exit are cunts as well.

I can't agree Eric old boy. Just think of the danger single lane slip-roads adjoining motorways would create if all were that narrow, with some old cunt in his Citroen poodling along at 50mph with HGVs already travelling at 60-65mph in the slow lane. At least wider slip-roads or dual carriageways generally provide an opportunity for faster-moving traffic to join more safely. But yes, I acknowledge some people driving too slowly move to the right too often on slip-roads, and literally become 50% blind because they don't bother checking their rear-view mirrors when joining motorways.   

[Eric Cuntman]

17 minutes ago, Wolfie said:

I can't agree Eric old boy. Just think of the danger single lane slip-roads adjoining motorways would create if all were that narrow, with some old cunt in his Citroen poodling along at 50mph with HGVs already travelling at 60-65mph in the slow lane. At least wider slip-roads or dual carriageways generally provide an opportunity for faster-moving traffic to join more safely. But yes, I acknowledge some people driving too slowly move to the right too often on slip-roads, and literally become 50% blind because they don't bother checking their rear-view mirrors when joining motorways.   

Fair point, the only answer would be a separate section of the driving test, concentrating on dual carriageways and motorways, anyone incapable of safely driving at 70 or unable to use mirrors and understand lane discipline would only be allowed a restricted license, prohibiting them from leaving towns and B-roads, I've never understood how the government tests drivers and grants licenses when the driver has never gone above 40, and is then immediately allowed to drive on an unfamiliar multi-lane road at nearly twice that speed.

[Wolfie]

12 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Fair point, the only answer would be a separate section of the driving test, concentrating on dual carriageways and motorways, anyone incapable of safely driving at 70 or unable to use mirrors and understand lane discipline would only be allowed a restricted license, prohibiting them from leaving towns and B-roads, I've never understood how the government tests drivers and grants licenses when the driver has never gone above 40, and is then immediately allowed to drive on an unfamiliar multi-lane road at nearly twice that speed.

Agree. I passed my test at 17 (not all that long ago) and, having driven only in towns and thoroughly inexperienced, was legally permitted to let rip on a piece of road in which you can generally push 90mph. The other consideration here is you can learn to drive in a Nissan Micra – and legally get behind the wheel of a 300bhp Subaru Impreza WRC later the same day.

[Roadkill]

26 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Fair point, the only answer would be a separate section of the driving test, concentrating on dual carriageways and motorways, anyone incapable of safely driving at 70 or unable to use mirrors and understand lane discipline would only be allowed a restricted license, prohibiting them from leaving towns and B-roads, I've never understood how the government tests drivers and grants licenses when the driver has never gone above 40, and is then immediately allowed to drive on an unfamiliar multi-lane road at nearly twice that speed.

There's actually a thing called Pass Plus these days where they give you specific lessons at night and on motorways. I did it before I passed my test because it apparently lowers your insurance (load of bollocks) but it's not mandatory or anything. What annoys me most is cunts who refuse to move over to let you in, even if the lane alongside them is empty. We've got roadworks on one of the dual carriageways near mine that slows both lanes to 30 and shortens the slip roads and cunts will make it their goal in life to slowly cruise down the left lane ignoring any merging traffic and refusing to move over into the right lane to let people join. Utter clueless wankers.

[Eric Cuntman]

30 minutes ago, Roadkill said:

There's actually a thing called Pass Plus these days where they give you specific lessons at night and on motorways. I did it before I passed my test because it apparently lowers your insurance (load of bollocks) but it's not mandatory or anything. What annoys me most is cunts who refuse to move over to let you in, even if the lane alongside them is empty. We've got roadworks on one of the dual carriageways near mine that slows both lanes to 30 and shortens the slip roads and cunts will make it their goal in life to slowly cruise down the left lane ignoring any merging traffic and refusing to move over into the right lane to let people join. Utter clueless wankers.

When you did the Pass Plus thing, were you actually allowed on A-roads/motorways as a learner driver, or was it a theory based thing?

[Roadkill]

1 minute ago, Eric Cuntman said:

When you did the Pass Plus thing, were you actually allowed on A-roads/motorways as a learner driver, or was it a theory based thing?

I drove on motorways so it must've been after my test, then. My bad.

[Eric Cuntman]

1 minute ago, Roadkill said:

I drove on motorways so it must've been after my test, then. My bad.

I'm surprised you were allowed a driving licence with a name like Roadkill! Must've been a brave instructor to take on a booking like that.

[Roadkill]

1 minute ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I'm surprised you were allowed a driving licence with a name like Roadkill! Must've been a brave instructor to take on a booking like that.

I promised the instructor a free meal. She didn't click on, so here I am.

[Guest Snatch]

I see there are changes coming to the test to let learners find their way around using a sat nav and reversing round corners using a rear view mirror.

Why not just let the brainless cunts do the test in a driverless car and be done with it.

[ratcum]

Remember those public info broadcasts: "THINK ONCE, THINK TWICE, THINK BIKE"? Well a lad in our school died on his motorbike, so we replaced the word "BIKE" with his name. Larks a jilty.

[PANZER MURPHY]

3 hours ago, Wolfie said:

Oh, they most definitely cause accidents by frustrating other road users into taking greater risks. That said, some people are just plain thick and can't land a good job because they have no qualifications, and consequently can only afford shitty, rusty French cars which can't even make the speed limit going down a bloody hill. While Pantysniffer isn't a particularly knowledgeable chap, I'll wager he's a world authority on this particular subject.

Speed kills ...man 

Panzerknacker 

[Roadkill]

26 minutes ago, Snatch said:

I see there are changes coming to the test to let learners find their way around using a sat nav and reversing round corners using a rear view mirror.

Why not just let the brainless cunts do the test in a driverless car and be done with it.

What they should teach them is how much of a fucking rip off sat navs are in the first place. Went to update the maps on my five year old one I found in the drawer the other day and the cunts want fucking £40. I paid £80 for the cunt in the first place! Fuck 'em I'll get a new A-Z for £3 and sell the electric cunt.

[Guest Drew P Pissflaps]

Cunts who pay for map updates are the pinnacle of stupidity. To the best of my knowledge, places have never changed position so you need to update where they are. Fair enough that new roads get built or priorities change on existing routes but I cannot remember a new road being built on the route of an old railway line but spacktards allegedly following their Satnav still seem to end up on one in their Berlingo van (probably) on the odd occasion.

[Guest DingTheRioja]

9 hours ago, Snatch said:

I see there are changes coming to the test to let learners find their way around using a sat nav and reversing round corners using a rear view mirror.

Why not just let the brainless cunts do the test in a driverless car and be done with it.

The bit I saw was about stopping the reversing round corners bit but learning to reverse park into the supermarket spaces, actually much more useful since the amount of cunts who drive headfirst into a space then can't reverse back out because of the front end swing is horrendous.  They drive into the space at 100mph cos they want to save time, then spend half an hour trying to get back out of it.

I'd add to the list of penalties that if you drive forwards into one of these spaces, you get one testicle or tit removed per offense...

[Guest Snatch]

59 minutes ago, DingTheRioja said:

The bit I saw was about stopping the reversing round corners bit but learning to reverse park into the supermarket spaces, actually much more useful since the amount of cunts who drive headfirst into a space then can't reverse back out because of the front end swing is horrendous.  They drive into the space at 100mph cos they want to save time, then spend half an hour trying to get back out of it.

I'd add to the list of penalties that if you drive forwards into one of these spaces, you get one testicle or tit removed per offense...

With all these transgender freaks around, they'll get 4 chances with 2 tits and two bollocks. 

[Guest Snatch]

7 hours ago, Drew P Pissflaps said:

Cunts who pay for map updates are the pinnacle of stupidity. To the best of my knowledge, places have never changed position so you need to update where they are. Fair enough that new roads get built or priorities change on existing routes but I cannot remember a new road being built on the route of an old railway line but spacktards allegedly following their Satnav still seem to end up on one in their Berlingo van (probably) on the odd occasion.

I can never understand how people have ended up in rivers using a sat nav.

The thing tells you to turn right, in front of you is a river. You brake and reverse up.

It's not that hard surely. 

[Wolfie]

15 hours ago, Panzerknacker said:

Speed kills ...man 

Panzerknacker 

While there's no chance of such a thing happening in your shitty French cuntmobile, have you tried snorting 5-6 grammes of amphetamine sulphate? It'll be enough to kill you. I am happy to chip in and pay for such a feat – together with the 90% of others on this site who also think you're a wanker.

[PANZER MURPHY]

4 minutes ago, Wolfie said:

While there's no chance of such a thing happening in your shitty French cuntmobile, have you tried snorting 5-6 grammes of amphetamine sulphate? It'll be enough to kill you. I am happy to chip in and pay for such a feat – together with the 90% of others on this site who also think you're a wanker.

Statistics are arbitrary 55% of people will tell ya that wuggers 

Panzerknacker