Ape™️ Posted May 11, 2017 Report Share Posted May 11, 2017 9 hours ago, Ollyboro said: Really, really sorry that your Aunt's shit telly has denied you the cultural highlight of life in Erinsborough, Pen. Allow me to bring you up to speed on the last couple of days. The two fourteen year old schoolgirls, Krakatesha and Asia-Skyline finally got together and discussed their differences over Troy. Krakatesha agreed that her jealousy was probably guilt transference over her previously poor treatment of Lysander, which had also led to her encouraging Zeus's Oedipus complex. Naturally this is what caused Zeus to throw acid in Desdemona's ( Calphurnia's lesbian lover) eyes. They're bezzie mates again. Phew!! Dr Ken was forced to use a trolley jack and chisel to perform an emergency escoptic liver transplant on Bloom, in a pub car park. He had to use the only organ in her body not riddled with cancer i.e her right eyeball for a procedure so radical it doesn't even exist. Bloom's expected to make a full recovery by Wednesday. During the operation, Marj recognised Dr Ken's chisel as the one that the masked assailant had stoved her head in with last week. As they both looked at the chisel, then each other's eyes, it became obvious that he knew that she knew and that she knew that he knew that she knew. Or that they just fancied each other. Catatonic is drinking again. The cliffhanger revolved around Caterpillar setting fire to his shed during a barbecue. Unfortunately his disabled kids, Egg and Pupa, had got their wheelchairs wedged inside the shed and were in grave danger of exploding with the faulty petrol lawnmower Bren had sold Caterpillar. Nobody could find Fire Chief Brody because he was running the coffee shop for Troy who was standing in as an air traffic controller for Malthusian, who had nipped out for a piss. Oh, and John Smith kicked the fuck out of the show's token aborigine. You obviously have too much time on your hands. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DingTheRioja Posted May 11, 2017 Report Share Posted May 11, 2017 Neighbours provided the world with this, so I'm fine with it... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted May 11, 2017 Report Share Posted May 11, 2017 34 minutes ago, The Lady Penelope said: Tuesday. Just to let you know, Philip Harben is on television tomorrow evening at 7:30pm (after pathe empire news) showing housewives how to entertain at home using food we have bought with our rationing cards. After which there's another exciting episode of Dick Barton on the radiogram. That Stalin's a cunt eh? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
camberwell gypsy Posted May 11, 2017 Report Share Posted May 11, 2017 2 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said: The world will never forgive this cunt for 'Check 123' a musical travesty only slightly less awful than Stefan Dennis' 'Don't It Make Ya Feel Good'. I'm glad I was Drunk for most of the 80s and missed this televisual delight. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eric Cuntman Posted May 11, 2017 Report Share Posted May 11, 2017 8 minutes ago, camberwell gypsy said: I'm glad I was Drunk for most of the 80s and missed this televisual delight. I was only 8 when the 80s began so I missed the piss-up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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