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Neighbours


Guest Lady Penelope

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Guest Lady Penelope

I am still really cross about this .. I used to watch Neighbours every evening on BBC 1 and I really enjoyed the true to life story lines. Then in 2008 some bastard decided to move it to Channel 5. As I have still got the Bush telly that Great Auntie Gertrude bought in 1951 I can only see programmes on BBC 1 and have not been able to watch Neigbours since 2008 .. this a complete cunt :(

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4 minutes ago, The Lady Penelope said:

I am still really cross about this .. I used to watch Neighbours every evening on BBC 1 and I really enjoyed the true to life story lines. Then in 2008 some bastard decided to move it to Channel 5. As I have still got the Bush telly that Great Auntie Gertrude bought in 1951 I can only see programmes on BBC 1 and have not been able to watch Neigbours since 2008 .. this a complete cunt :(

Not missing anything pen baby. .it's all shite since madge and mister bishop got eaten by cannibals on their honeymoon on cannibal island or something 

Panzerknacker 

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Guest Ollyboro

Really, really sorry that your Aunt's shit telly has denied you the cultural highlight of life in Erinsborough, Pen. Allow me to bring you up to speed on the last couple of days.

The two fourteen year old schoolgirls, Krakatesha and Asia-Skyline finally got together and discussed their differences over Troy. Krakatesha agreed that her jealousy was probably guilt transference over her previously poor treatment of Lysander, which had also led to her encouraging Zeus's Oedipus complex. Naturally this is what caused Zeus to throw acid  in Desdemona's ( Calphurnia's lesbian lover) eyes. They're bezzie mates again. Phew!!

Dr Ken was forced to use a trolley jack and chisel to perform an emergency escoptic liver transplant on Bloom, in a pub car park. He had to use the only organ in her body not riddled with cancer i.e her right eyeball for a procedure so radical it doesn't even exist. Bloom's expected to make a full recovery by Wednesday. During the operation, Marj recognised Dr Ken's chisel as the one that the masked assailant had stoved her head in with last week. As they both looked at the chisel, then each other's eyes, it became obvious that he knew that she knew and that she knew that he knew that she knew. Or that they just fancied each other.

Catatonic is drinking again.

The cliffhanger revolved around Caterpillar setting fire to his shed during a barbecue. Unfortunately his disabled kids, Egg and Pupa, had got their wheelchairs wedged inside the shed and were in grave danger of exploding with the faulty petrol lawnmower Bren had sold Caterpillar. Nobody could find Fire Chief Brody because he was running the coffee shop for Troy who was standing in as an air traffic controller for Malthusian, who had nipped out for a piss. Oh, and John Smith kicked the fuck out of the show's token aborigine.

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2 hours ago, The Lady Penelope said:

I am still really cross about this .. I used to watch Neighbours every evening on BBC 1 and I really enjoyed the true to life story lines. Then in 2008 some bastard decided to move it to Channel 5. As I have still got the Bush telly that Great Auntie Gertrude bought in 1951 I can only see programmes on BBC 1 and have not been able to watch Neigbours since 2008 .. this a complete cunt :(

I bet you still wear flowery housecoats, heavy clog shoes and a hair net. I didn't think you had time to watch tv, what with putting the washing through the mangle and shining the door knocker.

Btw isn't Thursday doorstep scrubbing day?

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Guest Mingeeta
2 hours ago, The Lady Penelope said:

I am still really cross about this .. I used to watch Neighbours every evening on BBC 1 and I really enjoyed the true to life story lines. Then in 2008 some bastard decided to move it to Channel 5. As I have still got the Bush telly that Great Auntie Gertrude bought in 1951 I can only see programmes on BBC 1 and have not been able to watch Neigbours since 2008 .. this a complete cunt :(

If you ask nicely and spread your wrinkly arse cheeks for a good smashing, your very own CC freeloading admirer might steal you a new one.

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3 minutes ago, Mingeeta said:

If you ask nicely and spread your wrinkly arse cheeks for a good smashing, your very own CC freeloading admirer might steal you a new one.

Yours isn't any use..it's 12 volt. .you have a 12 volt lifestyle. .caravan living in cunt 

Panzerknacker 

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Guest Mingeeta
1 minute ago, Panzerknacker said:

 .caravan living in cunt 

Panzerknacker 

Hells fucking bells, what kind of English is that, really, if I were you I would have a word with the special needs teacher about your vocabulary next time you have a session.

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4 minutes ago, Mingeeta said:

Hells fucking bells, what kind of English is that, really, if I were you I would have a word with the special needs teacher about your vocabulary next time you have a session.

Would headmaster be annoyed mungers baby. ..would ya get six of the best cross arse...tellus for fuks sake. .

Panzerknacker 

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1 hour ago, Ollyboro said:

Really, really sorry that your Aunt's shit telly has denied you the cultural highlight of life in Erinsborough, Pen. Allow me to bring you up to speed on the last couple of days.

The two fourteen year old schoolgirls, Krakatesha and Asia-Skyline finally got together and discussed their differences over Troy. Krakatesha agreed that her jealousy was probably guilt transference over her previously poor treatment of Lysander, which had also led to her encouraging Zeus's Oedipus complex. Naturally this is what caused Zeus to throw acid  in Desdemona's ( Calphurnia's lesbian lover) eyes. They're bezzie mates again. Phew!!

Dr Ken was forced to use a trolley jack and chisel to perform an emergency escoptic liver transplant on Bloom, in a pub car park. He had to use the only organ in her body not riddled with cancer i.e her right eyeball for a procedure so radical it doesn't even exist. Bloom's expected to make a full recovery by Wednesday. During the operation, Marj recognised Dr Ken's chisel as the one that the masked assailant had stoved her head in with last week. As they both looked at the chisel, then each other's eyes, it became obvious that he knew that she knew and that she knew that he knew that she knew. Or that they just fancied each other.

Catatonic is drinking again.

The cliffhanger revolved around Caterpillar setting fire to his shed during a barbecue. Unfortunately his disabled kids, Egg and Pupa, had got their wheelchairs wedged inside the shed and were in grave danger of exploding with the faulty petrol lawnmower Bren had sold Caterpillar. Nobody could find Fire Chief Brody because he was running the coffee shop for Troy who was standing in as an air traffic controller for Malthusian, who had nipped out for a piss. Oh, and John Smith kicked the fuck out of the show's token aborigine.

Fuck all that, is Bouncer ok?

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Guest Drew P Pissflaps

umm. Panzeroil? sounds as if it has been mixed with shit to bulk it up. Where exactly does this originate from? and is it all of your own making?

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22 minutes ago, Drew P Pissflaps said:

umm. Panzeroil? sounds as if it has been mixed with shit to bulk it up. Where exactly does this originate from? and is it all of your own making?

100% organic and manufactured on site droopz baby and even comes in its own handy dispenser. .made using coffee..herbal teas. .veg and tuna with a twist of pepper for that extra kick get some for that special lady in your life..other the one you stalk. .whichever 

Panzerknacker 

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1 hour ago, Cuntybaws said:

I would have cured Plain Jane Super Brain’s acne problem with repeated facial applications of my man-paste.

Fucking hell yes! She was rather comely, that was the last time I watched that crap, once Kylie & Jason got married with Ironbar from Mad Max 3 singing in the background and Joe mangel left, I was about 15 and completely lost interest.

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4 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

The world will never forgive this cunt for 'Check 123' a musical travesty only slightly less awful than Stefan Dennis' 'Don't It Make Ya Feel Good'.

I checked wiki to see if this overgrown oompa loompa was dead, and consequently my otherwise good day is now on a mild downer.

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Guest Lady Penelope
8 hours ago, Ollyboro said:

Really, really sorry that your Aunt's shit telly has denied you the cultural highlight of life in Erinsborough, Pen. Allow me to bring you up to speed on the last couple of days.

The two fourteen year old schoolgirls, Krakatesha and Asia-Skyline finally got together and discussed their differences over Troy. Krakatesha agreed that her jealousy was probably guilt transference over her previously poor treatment of Lysander, which had also led to her encouraging Zeus's Oedipus complex. Naturally this is what caused Zeus to throw acid  in Desdemona's ( Calphurnia's lesbian lover) eyes. They're bezzie mates again. Phew!!

Dr Ken was forced to use a trolley jack and chisel to perform an emergency escoptic liver transplant on Bloom, in a pub car park. He had to use the only organ in her body not riddled with cancer i.e her right eyeball for a procedure so radical it doesn't even exist. Bloom's expected to make a full recovery by Wednesday. During the operation, Marj recognised Dr Ken's chisel as the one that the masked assailant had stoved her head in with last week. As they both looked at the chisel, then each other's eyes, it became obvious that he knew that she knew and that she knew that he knew that she knew. Or that they just fancied each other.

Catatonic is drinking again.

The cliffhanger revolved around Caterpillar setting fire to his shed during a barbecue. Unfortunately his disabled kids, Egg and Pupa, had got their wheelchairs wedged inside the shed and were in grave danger of exploding with the faulty petrol lawnmower Bren had sold Caterpillar. Nobody could find Fire Chief Brody because he was running the coffee shop for Troy who was standing in as an air traffic controller for Malthusian, who had nipped out for a piss. Oh, and John Smith kicked the fuck out of the show's token aborigine.

Thank you for this update .. next Neighours update request will be in 2026.

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