Posh cunts who take their kids to expensive restaurants

[Witheredscrote]

6 minutes ago, Wolfie said:

Having read it twice, I can't see any words in the nom which claim the maître d' was a typically rude and terse cunt, and nor did I see observations indicating they were served by a waitress with a top-lip mole that sprouted a shock of hair like Cher's fleecy mane. There's no suggestion of a battle of bouquets between garlic and BO, either, or so much of a whiff of an overpriced and shitty wine list. It can't be French.  

You are no longer welcome at Chez Withers. Goodbye.

[Guest Drew P Pissflaps]

Everyone seems to have missed the biggest elephant in the room. 

Girlfriend!??!

I always thought Will-i-am Useless was gay.

[Frank]

4 hours ago, Bill Stickers said:

Someone already made that joke on my last nomination about the fat, spitting cunt.

You add nothing new Mingy. You just make up the numbers, like an unnamed aborted foetus, or anonymous victim of some forgotten colonial genocide. 

 

I'm not convinced the bitty drawn-out approach is having the desired effect on weaker members. Engaging with the likes of Mingeeta and Stupid Pecker certainly won't stand you in good stead. Move on.

[Guest Bill Stickers]

18 minutes ago, Frank said:

I'm not convinced the bitty drawn-out approach is having the desired effect on weaker members. Engaging with the likes of Mingeeta and Stupid Pecker certainly won't stand you in good stead. Move on.

Sage advice. There's not much big game trophy hunting to be found these days though old boy. 

Did you see Rick threw two of these underling types in the cooler during our absence, just for calling him a twat? Fucking good on him. 

[Frank]

20 minutes ago, Bill Stickers said:

Sage advice. There's not much big game trophy hunting to be found these days though old boy. 

Did you see Rick threw two of these underling types in the cooler during our absence, just for calling him a twat? Fucking good on him. 

Please, stay off my side.

[Stubby Pecker]

I'll give you one thing billiam, you've certainly generated 50 + posts of rotting shit with this nom and become minge's new panzyknacker now they hold hands regularly. 

Back to topic, me and the future mrs stubby once stopped in a lovely new forest pub after a days spring hiking. Almost empty, we choose a cosy seat by the fire and awaited hearty food and pints of ale (just the mrs, I'm a blue nun man). Low and behold a couple with a child came and sat right next to us despite the place being fucking massive a virtually empty.

The wee lad was well behaved so it would have been bearable had his foppish dad and hyperactive mum, a bog trotter, constantly talked to each other and berated the poor little cunt at full volume.

We ate up quickly, back to the hotel where I gave the mrs one up the wrong un'

[Frank]

Just now, Stubby Pecker said:

I'll give you one thing billiam, you've certainly generated 50 + posts of rotting shit with this nom and become minge's new panzyknacker now they hold hands regularly. 

Back to topic, me and the future mrs stubby once stopped in a lovely new forest pub after a days spring hiking. Almost empty, we choose a cosy seat by the fire and awaited hearty food and pints of ale (just the mrs, I'm a blue nun man). Low and behold a couple with a child came and sat right next to us despite the place being fucking massive a virtually empty.

The wee lad was well behaved so it would have been bearable had his foppish dad and hyperactive mum, a bog trotter, constantly talked to each other and berated the poor little cunt at full volume.

We ate up quickly, back to the hotel where I gave the mrs one up the wrong un'

One of the very few posts where you haven't included the word 'vile'. Everything ok Stubs?

 

[Frank]

3 hours ago, Mingeeta said:

Trust me billyboy, I'm not now, or ever threatened by a bloke who looks like a 2 bit mong.

Ming I'm not one to take sides, but it really really looks like he's got right up your nose.. with very little effort. Shit.

[Guest Lady Penelope]

5 hours ago, Bill Stickers said:

Ditto. Make yourself a statistic ding, please.

Ming and Ding they should go hand in hand to Dignitas.

[Stubby Pecker]

6 minutes ago, Frank said:

One of the very few posts where you haven't included the word 'vile'. Everything ok Stubs?

 

I'm not bad thanks frank, how very nice of you to ask. I would, however, be feeling a lot more chipper if the image of your disheveled corpse, minus an arm, had not been a fake. I had it on good authority that you had a Quincy special in your mouth and were in a shallow grave somewhere grotty, depressing and never to be found. 

The lying, vile cunts

[Wolfie]

33 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said:

I'll give you one thing billiam, you've certainly generated 50 + posts of rotting shit with this nom and become minge's new panzyknacker now they hold hands regularly. 

Back to topic, me and the future mrs stubby once stopped in a lovely new forest pub after a days spring hiking. Almost empty, we choose a cosy seat by the fire and awaited hearty food and pints of ale (just the mrs, I'm a blue nun man). Low and behold a couple with a child came and sat right next to us despite the place being fucking massive a virtually empty.

The wee lad was well behaved so it would have been bearable had his foppish dad and hyperactive mum, a bog trotter, constantly talked to each other and berated the poor little cunt at full volume.

We ate up quickly, back to the hotel where I gave the mrs one up the wrong un'

The wife of the other man sitting next to you sounds like a right fucking slag! Still, the sophistication of a restaurant suggests you weren't dogging.

[Guest Ollyboro]

2 minutes ago, Frank said:

Ming I'm not one to take sides, but it really really looks like he's got right up your nose.. with very little effort. Shit.

Talk about a punctured blow up doll. I received a pm informing me that an old-timer had turned up. "Fucking great", I thought, "I hope it's Judy, or Cat". Then a truly horrible thought hit me. Prof B, or Wad. Far, far worse, it's you. I haven't been this disappointed since I was 6 years old and  placed my milk tooth underneath my pillow and waited for the tooth fairy to leave me some cold hard cash. Instead I was awoken at 2am by my Father, who informed me that my Mother had just died of cancer, and he was running off to manage a gay bar in Malta. 

P fucking S: Kill yourself, you pile of shit.

[Frank]

3 minutes ago, Ollyboro said:

• Talk about a punctured blow up doll. I received a pm informing me that an old-timer had turned up. "Fucking great", I thought, "I hope it's Judy, or Cat". Then a truly horrible thought hit me. Prof B, or Wad. Far, far worse, it's you. I haven't been this disappointed since I was 6 years old and  placed my milk tooth underneath my pillow and waited for the tooth fairy to leave me some cold hard cash. Instead I was awoken at 2am by my Father, who informed me that my Mother had just died of cancer, and he was running off to manage a gay bar in Malta. 

P fucking S: Kill yourself, you pile of shit.

Olly we used to get on just fine. I know I belittled you and made your bum bleed when you rejoined the site after a long absence, but I was only playing. 

[Stubby Pecker]

9 minutes ago, Wolfie said:

The wife of the other man sitting next to you sounds like a right fucking slag! Still, the sophistication of a restaurant suggests you weren't dogging.

She was quite tidy, and if the car keys had come out I might have thought about it, but she was a bog rat. Plus knowing what I know now about vaginal slackness, post kids, I'm glad I kept the mrs for a few years of not having to go up the wrong 'un.

What is the "dogging" you speak of?

[Wolfie]

12 minutes ago, Stubby Pecker said:

She was quite tidy, and if the car keys had come out I might have thought about it, but she was a bog rat. Plus knowing what I know now about vaginal slackness, post kids, I'm glad I kept the mrs for a few years of not having to go up the wrong 'un.

What is the "dogging" you speak of?

There's nothing erroneous with a bit of wrong 'un sex. Just ask Mr Roops. 

[Earl of Punkape]

35 minutes ago, Frank said:

One of the very few posts where you haven't included the word 'vile'. Everything ok Stubs?

 

He normally recites a gay sex diatribe in most of his posts usless it's about the torture of sex offenders where he wants to inflict the torment......

He's also developed full blown AIDS Frank.

Can you give him hope or faith ?

[Guest Lady Penelope]

1 minute ago, Punkape said:

He normally recites a gay sex diatribe in most of his posts usless it's about the torture of sex offenders where he wants to inflict the torment......

He's also developed full blown AIDS Frank.

Can you give him hope or faith ?

PLEB

[Guest Ollyboro]

12 minutes ago, Frank said:

Olly we used to get on just fine. I know I belittled you and made your bum bleed when you rejoined the site after a long absence, but I was only playing. 

No, Fred, you belittled yourself. As you continue to do; hanging on to false memories is never a pleasant trait. Good evening.

[Guest Alfie Noakes]

2 minutes ago, Punkape said:

He normally recites a gay sex diatribe in most of his posts usless it's about the torture of sex offenders where he wants to inflict the torment......

He's also developed full blown AIDS Frank.

Can you give him hope or faith ?

You disgusting little poof, fuck off.

[Earl of Punkape]

Just now, The Lady Penelope said:

PLEB

Get back to your kerbcrawling patch hussey.....

lol.

[Earl of Punkape]

Just now, Alfie Noakes said:

You disgusting little poof, fuck off.

Visiting time at Broadmoor finished ?

lol.

[Guest Alfie Noakes]

1 minute ago, Punkape said:

Visiting time at Broadmoor finished ?

lol.

Taking a break from your queue of punters?

Horrid little man.

[Stubby Pecker]

12 minutes ago, Wolfie said:

There's nothing erroneous with a bit of wrong 'un sex. Just ask Mr Roops. 

Ok, "roops darling, when I poked up your shite pipe last night, did I reach the gibblets like the time we were courting and I did you over the railings on the Severn bridge?"

[Frank]

1 minute ago, Punkape said:

He normally recites a gay sex diatribe in most of his posts usless it's about the torture of sex offenders where he wants to inflict the torment......

He's also developed full blown AIDS Frank.

Can you give him hope or faith ?

It's a mockery that Proper has allowed these humourless fucking student types to continue. Did you see the awful state poor kid mingeeta got himself into tonight? Look at fucking Ape! Thank god there's us Punkers. 

I'll take over from here.

 

[Guest Gong Farmer]

7 hours ago, Bill Stickers said:

It was the girlfriend's birthday this week, so I broke from my usual cuntish existence, and booked a nice restaurant in South Kensington.

I'm happy to admit it's not the kind of place we'd usually go, unlike our resident charlatans Walter Spunkgape and International Head of Ethics for the Caravan Club, DingTheDoggie, who spend their days living off all expenses paid meals of quails eggs, vintage claret and their own bullshit.

Anyway, we're sat having some decent grub and nice wine - for the Welsh on here, think bottle of Blue Nun and pair of well done steak from Little Chef.

Then some speccy-eyed, mildly autistic looking cunt who probably works in asset liquidation, in a pink shirt and green chinos, gets seated next to us with his little Tarquin, probably aged 5 or 6.

I fucking hate kids, especially posh ones. So I'd like to give the little toerag some credit. He was quite well behaved, apart from occasionally lolling around the seating like a moderate to severe spastic due to extreme fits of boredom.

I think he was one of those posh kids who would be an absolute dribbler, if it wasn't for the 10k-a-term private education, which elevates him to an almost median level of intelligence.

The good behaviour can probably be attributed to him knowing if he misbehaves at daddies lunch time, he gets sent back to the boarding school in Jersey again, where he gets buggered raw by the senior choristers and choir master. 

Anyway, I digress.

The poor little cunt asked for ham, egg and chips, as a normal kid might. Of course, they can't accommodate this, so his absent father just orders him salmon chantilly.

The poor little cunt looked devestated. It didn't help I was joyously eating my ice cream desert right next to him with a big, shit eating grin on my face.

Posh was it? Well I wouldn't have let a low rent looking cunt like through the door in the first place. Stick to what you know, a Harvester, fifteen quid all in including a free pint of Carling Black label.