Dopey women who walk around with their iPhone poking out their back pocket

[Guest Bill Stickers]

I'm not sure if this is just a London thing, but if so, it's even more incredibly moronic considering you're more likely to get it snatched here than anywhere else.

I can only assume this is some kind of misguided attempt at flaunting wealth. In 2017 everyone and their brother has an iPhone all the way down to semi-literate goat herders in sub-Saharan Africa and ex-soviet States.

Saying that, it still has a value of at least several hundred pounds. Would anyone be so stupid as to leave £400 cash prevalently poking out of their back pocket walking down Oxford Street?

What's most dissapointing is that it's often women with good arses who do this, but the better the arse the more the phone protrudes from the back pocket. This leaves me a little angry and confused. 

A fool and their money are soon parted, and their arseholes.

[Jiggerycock]

It's a conundrum of that there can be no doubt, this whole arse / I-Phone snatch (if you will) deal.

On the one hand, a huge posterior, poured into a pair of skin-tight hipsters is not attractive, yet may well render it nigh on impossible, without the aid of lube, a torque wrench and incredible manual dexterity, to lever it out of a back pocket, no matter how gaudy the display.

Paradoxically though, the more pert the botty (Punkers has just wanked himself into a sherbert fountain), the easier the liberation of the I-phone.

I seem to have strayed somewhat from the point at issue but in a nuthshell - Kylie? Look after that phone! Diane Abbott? Flaunt-on sistah!

[Guest Manky]

iPhones are as gay as fuck. Thick as fuck cunts are walking around with a piece of technology where the inbuilt torch has a higher IQ than the owner. What is the point of spending the fiscal equivalent of a shagged liver and terminal jaundice if you can't use 95% of the phones capability.

Aforementioned dibdobs go into meltdown over a lost phone and are totally paranoid about anyone near their little baby. Insurance won't give you back your contacts and I will guarantee the majority of posing dilettantes will not back anything up. If kids of 12 use them, they aren't much good for grown-up posing.

My £45 Vodafone own brand does more than I can. I don't keep it in by back pocket though, easy way of cracking the screen. I wonder what the iPhone to population ratio is down amongst the southern Jessie's in that there London compared to the real folk of the northern badlands.

 

[Decimus]

25 minutes ago, Manky said:

 

My £45 Vodafone own brand does more than I can. I don't keep it in by back pocket though, easy way of cracking the screen.

 

Shoving your £1.99 Tomy toy mobile up one of your pigeons arseholes, then sending it out into the world with some illegible scrawl engraved on the phone screen, does not constitute a communication device.

Fucking northern pig.

[Roadkill]

26 minutes ago, Manky said:

iPhones are as gay as fuck. Thick as fuck cunts are walking around with a piece of technology where the inbuilt torch has a higher IQ than the owner. What is the point of spending the fiscal equivalent of a shagged liver and terminal jaundice if you can't use 95% of the phones capability.

Aforementioned dibdobs go into meltdown over a lost phone and are totally paranoid about anyone near their little baby. Insurance won't give you back your contacts and I will guarantee the majority of posing dilettantes will not back anything up. If kids of 12 use them, they aren't much good for grown-up posing.

My £45 Vodafone own brand does more than I can. I don't keep it in by back pocket though, easy way of cracking the screen. I wonder what the iPhone to population ratio is down amongst the southern Jessie's in that there London compared to the real folk of the northern badlands.

 

I don't even have a mobile at the moment as mine died a few months back, it's quite a liberating experience apart from realizing that telephone booths still smell like piss.

[Guest Manky]

1 minute ago, Roadkill said:

I don't even have a mobile at the moment as mine died a few months back, it's quite a liberating experience apart from realizing that telephone booths still smell like piss.

I  wouldn't have one either if I had the choice. No cunt ever phones you up and says "Remember that £50 you lent me when you were pissed?, I have it here for you" Mrs Manky makes me carry one due to my age and infirmity and I am not brave enough or reckless enough to say no.

[Guest Manky]

9 minutes ago, Decimus said:

Shoving your £1.99 Tomy toy mobile up one of your pigeons arseholes, then sending it out into the world with some illegible scrawl engraved on the phone screen, does not constitute a communication device.

Fucking northern pig.

My guess is you have an iPhone on vibrate and strapped to your knob. Twisted inbred mong.

[Roadkill]

Just now, Manky said:

I  wouldn't have one either if I had the choice. No cunt ever phones you up and says "Remember that £50 you lent me when you were pissed?, I have it here for you" Mrs Manky makes me carry one due to my age and infirmity and I am not brave enough or reckless enough to say no.

You could always just "accidentally" put it on silent mode. Every other cunt in public has a mobile, so if you keel over they're bound to ring 999 for you. Unless you pass out on the shitter, in which case it's probably time to go if you're too frail to handle a shite anyway.

[Cuntybaws]

1 minute ago, Manky said:

My guess is you have an iPhone on vibrate and strapped to your knob. Twisted inbred mong.

If they ever put Bluetooth into a Rampant Rabbit Mrs Baws will be like a pig in shit.

[Guest Bill Stickers]

9 minutes ago, Roadkill said:

I don't even have a mobile at the moment as mine died a few months back, it's quite a liberating experience apart from realizing that telephone booths still smell like piss.

A luxury one can afford when they are estranged from all their family, have no friends and live as a hermit in a corrugated iron shack in the Forest of Dean. 

[Roadkill]

1 minute ago, Bill Stickers said:

A luxury one can afford when they are estranged from all their family, have no friends and live as a hermit in a corrugated iron shack in the Forest of Dean. 

And I get more quiet time to work on my projects:

[Guest Manky]

3 minutes ago, Bill Stickers said:

A luxury one can afford when they are estranged from all their family, have no friends and live as a hermit in a corrugated iron shack in the Forest of Dean. 

I heard that 3 weeks after you moved in to your current home, your neighbours asked for a house swap with the family next door to Fred and Rose West

[Wolfie]

6 hours ago, Manky said:

I heard that 3 weeks after you moved in to your current home, your neighbours asked for a house swap with the family next door to Fred and Rose West

Thankfully, for the rest of the UK, they managed to find somewhere in Manchester, next to a mosque.

[Guest Manky]

12 minutes ago, Wolfie said:

Thankfully, for the rest of the UK, they managed to find somewhere in Manchester, next to a mosque.

Our local mosque got fire-bombed and gutted 3 or 4 weeks ago. Now the rumour has it that the council is closing one of the few remaining pubs to give to the religion of peace for conversion into a new mosque.

I suspect that this may not end well.

[Wolfie]

2 minutes ago, Manky said:

Our local mosque got fire-bombed and gutted 3 or 4 weeks ago. Now the rumour has it that the council is closing one of the few remaining pubs to give to the religion of peace for conversion into a new mosque.

I suspect that this may not end well.

It pains me to say it, but I'm actually not surprised. Still, at least Manchester as a whole still has some Britishness to be proud of, such as Man Utd.

[Guest Manky]

3 minutes ago, Wolfie said:

It pains me to say it, but I'm actually not surprised. Still, at least Manchester as a whole still has some Britishness to be proud of, such as Man Utd.

Man Utd, (owned by foreigners and managed by a foreigner with 90% of the players foreign) are not from Manchester. And, in my opinion, neither are mosque users.

[Eric Cuntman]

20 minutes ago, Manky said:

Our local mosque got fire-bombed and gutted 3 or 4 weeks ago. Now the rumour has it that the council is closing one of the few remaining pubs to give to the religion of peace for conversion into a new mosque.

I suspect that this may not end well.

I strongly suspect that this will end with the pub being handed over and the goat botherers getting their way as usual. And we will all sit back, grumble a bit and that will be an end to it. Nobody, north, south, anywhere has the balls to stand up to the leftie fascists anymore. We're fucked.

[Guest Manky]

2 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

I strongly suspect that this will end with the pub being handed over and the goat botherers getting their way as usual. And we will all sit back, grumble a bit and that will be an end to it. Nobody, north, south, anywhere has the balls to stand up to the leftie fascists anymore. We're fucked.

I doubt that the ones from sandy places have enough worshippers in the area to fill a phone box. The same can't be said about African Christian Churches. I believe that by putting a mosque in the area, they declare the area as part of the Caliphate and claim grants from the Euroradicalisation programme to finance their vested interests. (suicide or bulletproof)

[Rick_B]

37 minutes ago, Manky said:

Our local mosque got fire-bombed and gutted 3 or 4 weeks ago. Now the rumour has it that the council is closing one of the few remaining pubs to give to the religion of peace for conversion into a new mosque.

I suspect that this may not end well.

I very much doubt that a council would have the power to close an open viable pub and convert it to a Mosque, although they could refuse to allow an already  closed pub to reopen, especially if there are objections from the police because of trouble there in the past.

[Decimus]

18 minutes ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Nobody, north, south, anywhere has the balls to stand up to the leftie fascists anymore. We're fucked.

I don't know about that, Eric. I've always considered myself left wing, but along with others that I know of the same political persuasion, I'm fast becoming disillusioned with how militant the left has become in recent years.

I no longer feel welcome in an ideology which increasingly tells me I should feel overwhelming shame for my heterosexuality,race, sex and class. The principle of equality has been twisted to the point where certain minority sections of society now wish to be more equal than anyone else, and demonise anyone who dares to criticise the hypocrisy of what the left now espouses.

More and more people traditionally aligned to the left such as myself are looking for a different path, and I truly believe that the current movement will collapse in on itself. 

[Guest Manky]

7 minutes ago, Rick_B said:

I very much doubt that a council would have the power to close an open viable pub and convert it to a Mosque, although they could refuse to allow an already  closed pub to reopen, especially if there are objections from the police because of trouble there in the past.

I doubt it too but it is a good rumour I started.

[Eric Cuntman]

58 minutes ago, Decimus said:

I don't know about that, Eric. I've always considered myself left wing, but along with others that I know of the same political persuasion, I'm fast becoming disillusioned with how militant the left has become in recent years.

I no longer feel welcome in an ideology which increasingly tells me I should feel overwhelming shame for my heterosexuality,race, sex and class. The principle of equality has been twisted to the point where certain minority sections of society now wish to be more equal than anyone else, and demonise anyone who dares to criticise the hypocrisy of what the left now espouses.

More and more people traditionally aligned to the left such as myself are looking for a different path, and I truly believe that the current movement will collapse in on itself. 

I hope so. The true left, in itself isn't a bad thing, any society needs balance of attitude and opinion. The way the left is going is an Orwellian nightmare seeking to control thought and attitude, condemning any who opposes it's blinkered, totalitarian ideology by pointing fingers and screaming 'racism' and 'prejudice'. The way I see it at the moment, the only people being discriminated against are white heterosexuals. Churchill was a cunt on many levels, but he was dead right when he predicted that the fascists of the future would claim to be anti-fascists.

[Guest Manky]

Churchill is one of my all time heroes. A great leader. Without him this country would have been overrun by foreigners.

He died in '66 ( I think ) and until then, England was still England.

[Guest Bill Stickers]

11 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

The way I see it at the moment, the only people being discriminated against are white heterosexuals. 

Can you give me three examples of this happening to you in the last year?

If not I'll have to assume you're a black homo.

[Eric Cuntman]

1 hour ago, Bill Stickers said:

Can you give me three examples of this happening to you in the last year?

If not I'll have to assume you're a black homo.

You got me. My real name is Delroy and I live in Punkapes broom cupboard.