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Dreaming you are having a slash, only to wake up and find you are having a slash

The Beast

By The Beast
in The Corner

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Ape™️

Ape™️

Posted
Posted
Just now, Drew P Pissflaps said:

HaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHa. ...you're on fire tonight Ape. I don't know how you manage such original and witty come backs night after night. Hahaha. 

It wasn’t intended to be funny, you drunken wanker. I mean, how could I possibly hope to compete with someone as entertaining and witty as you?  

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Guest Drew P Pissflaps

Guest Drew P Pissflaps

Posted
Posted
4 minutes ago, Ape said:

It wasn’t intended to be funny, you drunken wanker. I mean, how could I possibly hope to compete with someone as entertaining and witty as you?  

Don't get disheartened though. You need to broaden your horizons and gain some life experiences rather than locking yourself in your bedroom with your Airfix kits.

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Guest Drew P Pissflaps

Guest Drew P Pissflaps

Posted
Posted
11 hours ago, The Beast said:

I appreciate all things piss have been examined on these pages, but this particular cunt has happened to me twice this year. Safely tucked up in my wanking pit, snoring away, fat fucking neck wobbling, mouth breathing, dreaming about the relief of having a fucking Jimmy, only to wake up mid flow.

I hope some of you hairy arsed cunts have suffered this indignity.

What did your partner say when he woke up next to a puddle of piss?

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Guest Drew P Pissflaps

Guest Drew P Pissflaps

Posted
Posted
14 minutes ago, Ape said:

HaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHa. ...you're on fire tonight Drew. I don't know how you manage such original and witty comments night after night. Hahaha. 

 

Give me a Like then you tight cunt.

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Guest Piston

Guest Piston

Posted
Posted
12 hours ago, The Beast said:

I appreciate all things piss have been examined on these pages, but this particular cunt has happened to me twice this year. Safely tucked up in my wanking pit, snoring away, fat fucking neck wobbling, mouth breathing, dreaming about the relief of having a fucking Jimmy, only to wake up mid flow.

I hope some of you hairy arsed cunts have suffered this indignity.

Relax.

Sleep with Bill or Decimus. They are used to taking the piss, regularly. Close proximity is not advised.

Do keep us updated.

 

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Earl of Punkape

Earl of Punkape

Posted
Posted
14 hours ago, The Beast said:

I appreciate all things piss have been examined on these pages, but this particular cunt has happened to me twice this year. Safely tucked up in my wanking pit, snoring away, fat fucking neck wobbling, mouth breathing, dreaming about the relief of having a fucking Jimmy, only to wake up mid flow.

I hope some of you hairy arsed cunts have suffered this indignity.

Have you read the book.... “Rusty Bedsprings”. by I.P. Knightly.

Lol.

Fuck off.

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ratcum

ratcum

Posted
Posted
16 minutes ago, Cap'n Cunt said:

If you dreamt that you were having a wank, then woke up to find you were shagging Carol Vorderman, would it be good or bad? I can't decide.

If as I've always suspected, she's called Carol Vodafone, then you've actually shagged a mobile.

Insert other media

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Stubby Pecker

Stubby Pecker

Posted
Posted
8 hours ago, Spanky said:

What is worse is dreaming that you are having a shit and waking up to find that you are actually Stubby. 

Let's hope for a very long sleep for you, one you never wake up from. 

What actually is your raison d'être? You bring nothing at all to the party, it's almost like you're under orders or have a split personality?

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Guest Lady Penelope

Guest Lady Penelope

Posted
Posted
On 03/10/2017 at 8:42 AM, The Beast said:

I appreciate all things piss have been examined on these pages, but this particular cunt has happened to me twice this year. Safely tucked up in my wanking pit, snoring away, fat fucking neck wobbling, mouth breathing, dreaming about the relief of having a fucking Jimmy, only to wake up mid flow.

I hope some of you hairy arsed cunts have suffered this indignity.

Actually its your punishment for grassing the grass Stubby.

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Guest Bill Stickers

Guest Bill Stickers

Posted
Posted

Has anyone seen a less relevant inter-member fight than Ape vs Drew? Like the sound of an air con unit, it very quick becomes background noise. 

The two school nerds pinching each other's kankles and muffin tops whilst everyone else gets on with business. 

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Ape™️

Ape™️

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, William T.D. Stickers said:

Has anyone seen a less relevant inter-member fight than Ape vs Drew? Like the sound of an air con unit, it very quick becomes background noise. 

The two school nerds pinching each other's kankles and muffin tops whilst everyone else gets on with business. 

But you couldn’t just ignore it, could you? It’s a great comment - well done.

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Stubby Pecker

Stubby Pecker

Posted
Posted
9 hours ago, William T.D. Stickers said:

Has anyone seen a less relevant inter-member fight than Ape vs Drew? Like the sound of an air con unit, it very quick becomes background noise. 

The two school nerds pinching each other's kankles and muffin tops whilst everyone else gets on with business. 

Has anyone come across a more irrelevant member of this bullshit forum than you young William? Your burning ambition to become top dog is floundering. I tire of the role and saw a newbie like yourself as a worthy successor. But alas... You're just a dog turd

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Guest Back door specialist

Guest Back door specialist

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Stubby Pecker said:

Has anyone come across a more irrelevant member of this bullshit forum than you young William? Your burning ambition to become top dog is floundering. I tire of the role and saw a newbie like yourself as a worthy successor. But alas... You're just a dog turd

And it's taken this long for this glaringly obvious fact to finally permeate your thick skull?

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Guest Back door specialist

Guest Back door specialist

Posted
Posted
13 hours ago, Stubby Pecker said:

Fuck off, this is between me a billy. We're not the best of mates but one thing we agree on is that you're a weapons grade fuckwit

:D

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