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Cunts who have the keyboard click enabled on their smartphones.


Penny Farthing

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1 hour ago, Penny Farthing said:

I had 30 minutes on the K38 omnibus yesterday with one of these dopey old cunts tap tapping away on his phone yesterday .. pure torture and I wanted to ram it down his stupid gob. All cunts who enable the keyboard click on their smartphones should be hanged.

Any man of your age that has to use public transport disgusts me. You should be fucking ashamed of yourself you filthy peasant cunt.

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1 hour ago, Penny Farthing said:

I had 30 minutes on the K38 omnibus yesterday with one of these dopey old cunts tap tapping away on his phone yesterday .. pure torture and I wanted to ram it down his stupid gob. All cunts who enable the keyboard click on their smartphones should be hanged.

I did it once all the way from London to Paris on EUROSTAR. A bossy woman behind me kept on complaining. Meanwhile I was fixated on an annoying cunt's back pack straps hanging down from the overhead luggage rack which constantly dangled back and forth in front of my eyes. In the buffet restaurant car I then became very frustrated at the lack of milk containers and the portion size of my full English breakfast club sandwich and the hard bits of bacon that wedged in my teeth. Moving onto the on board lavatory I noticed that the previous occupant had left a French turd the size of a Cumberland sausage and it seemed to be winking at me. Struggling to regain my seat and what was left of my composure I perceived the rucksack's straps had edged closer to my head due to vibration of the train and for the last ten minutes of the journey entering the graffiti festooned suburban neverland of gay Paris I endured the straps rhythmically slapping the back of my head until I arrived completely shattered at Gareth du Nord. 

Then I checked into an Ibis hotel. 

... and you think you had it rough. Boy it's gonna be a heavy drinking day today you sonna of a bitch. 

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1 minute ago, ChildeHarold said:

I did it once all the way from London to Paris on EUROSTAR. A bossy woman behind me kept on complaining. Meanwhile I was fixated on an annoying cunt's back pack straps hanging down from the overhead luggage rack which constantly dangled back and forth in front of my eyes. In the buffet restaurant car I then became very frustrated at the lack of milk containers and the portion size of my full English breakfast club sandwich and the hard bits of bacon that wedged in my teeth. Moving onto the on board lavatory I noticed that the previous occupant had left a French turd the size of a Cumberland sausage and it seemed to be winking at me. Struggling to regain my seat and what was left of my composure I perceived the rucksack's straps had edged closer to my head due to vibration of the train and for the last ten minutes of the journey entering the graffiti festooned suburban neverland of gay Paris I endured the straps rhythmically slapping the back of my head until I arrived completely shattered at Gareth du Nord. 

Then I checked into an Ibis hotel. 

... and you think you had it rough. Boy it's gonna be a heavy drinking day today you sonna of a bitch. 

How fucking enlightening. Spastic.

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18 minutes ago, Penny Farthing said:

How's your day been me old Cumberland?

I’m in Madrid, Large Length. I’ve just staggered out of the Reina Sofia museum after casting my eyes on the wonder of ‘Guernica.’ I’m in one of the finest local hostelries near the Plaza Mayor. They’ve just started playing a Spanish version of some Chas n Dave song. Some cunt’s getting leathered in a minute.

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1 hour ago, Dyslexic cnut said:

I’m in Madrid, Large Length. I’ve just staggered out of the Reina Sofia museum after casting my eyes on the wonder of ‘Guernica.’ I’m in one of the finest local hostelries near the Plaza Mayor. They’ve just started playing a Spanish version of some Chas n Dave song. Some cunt’s getting leathered in a minute.

I thought you wrote 'sofa museum' for a second there.  I mean that's got to be boring and pointless as that pencil museum 

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1 hour ago, Dyslexic cnut said:

I’m in Madrid, Large Length. I’ve just staggered out of the Reina Sofia museum after casting my eyes on the wonder of ‘Guernica.’ I’m in one of the finest local hostelries near the Plaza Mayor. They’ve just started playing a Spanish version of some Chas n Dave song. Some cunt’s getting leathered in a minute.

Plaza Mayor is a shite hole with greasy fucking lazy layabout thieving Dagos hanging around until the early morning. Oh sorry, that's the Plaza del Sol. Oh fuck it, it's all the same. You clearly aren't adding any class to the scenery. Fuck off. 

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1 minute ago, ChildeHarold said:

Plaza Mayor is a shite hole with greasy fucking lazy layabout thieving Dagos hanging around until the early morning. Oh sorry, that's the Plaza del Sol. Oh fuck it, it's all the same. You clearly aren't adding any class to the scenery. Fuck off. 

Imagine waking up in a hole in the cellar of a holiday villa in Cyprus. In the background you can hear ‘Goodbye Horses’ playing, and above you is a fat man in an Arsenal shirt bellowing…

”IT PUTS THE LOTION ON ITS FUCKING SKIN!”

 

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3 hours ago, Eric Cuntman said:

Imagine waking up in a hole in the cellar of a holiday villa in Cyprus. In the background you can hear ‘Goodbye Horses’ playing, and above you is a fat man in an Arsenal shirt bellowing…

”IT PUTS THE LOTION ON ITS FUCKING SKIN!”

 

I thought this was the one with two Albanians and one Visa Debit card. 

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14 hours ago, ChildeHarold said:

I did it once all the way from London to Paris on EUROSTAR. A bossy woman behind me kept on complaining. Meanwhile I was fixated on an annoying cunt's back pack straps hanging down from the overhead luggage rack which constantly dangled back and forth in front of my eyes. In the buffet restaurant car I then became very frustrated at the lack of milk containers and the portion size of my full English breakfast club sandwich and the hard bits of bacon that wedged in my teeth. Moving onto the on board lavatory I noticed that the previous occupant had left a French turd the size of a Cumberland sausage and it seemed to be winking at me. Struggling to regain my seat and what was left of my composure I perceived the rucksack's straps had edged closer to my head due to vibration of the train and for the last ten minutes of the journey entering the graffiti festooned suburban neverland of gay Paris I endured the straps rhythmically slapping the back of my head until I arrived completely shattered at Gareth du Nord. 

Then I checked into an Ibis hotel. 

... and you think you had it rough. Boy it's gonna be a heavy drinking day today you sonna of a bitch. 

Are you Michael Portillo’s stunt double?

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On 10/11/2023 at 08:10, Hammer of Cunts said:

"dopey old cunts" can still be told to shut up.

I still have no idea why anyone would want to pay a significant amount of money for a bit of glorified office equipment. What are they for (other than giving assorted shysters access to data)?

I know an old cunt of 76 who conducts almost all his worldly none bodily function matters from an iPhone .. he has also recently purchased a used Leica 40 megal pixel camera that only has the most basic functions for the modest sum of £4,000 and mounted a prehistoric lens on it.

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1 hour ago, Penny Farthing said:

I know an old cunt of 76 who conducts almost all his worldly none bodily function matters from an iPhone .. he has also recently purchased a used Leica 40 megal pixel camera that only has the most basic functions for the modest sum of £4,000 and mounted a prehistoric lens on it.

This would rank as one of your most boring posts ever (which takes some fucking doing), if any of it was true (which it obviously isn’t).

Fuck off.

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