colonelkurtz

Not even a free pen for just enquiring anymore. Parkinson .. Yorkshire Cunt

.. although it's not like inflicting collateral damage is a bad thing.

Yet all the lezzers on Pornhub are well fit

She more than likely promised to keep those gnashers well away from his bell end

Just to lower the tone, as it were , you just know it that the lying cunt sack of shit will at times have sat across the desk from the Coffey woman thinking "Yes .. I would "

The Patel womans knickers must be well and truly creamed by now

Will the Afghan earthquake deaths and injury tallies have separate penis vs vagina premier league tables with additional full beard vs burka play offs,straight vs gay shoot outs [geddit],flapping tent vs badly maintained shack sub divisions .. in other words just like every other aspect of life in Talibanville.

My Ma still wants to know when Sir Cliff of Richard is on

There's something about him that involves a length of rough sawn 4x2 meeting the slimy fuckers face at a rapid rate of knots

The de Pfeffel Johnson fuck must be unable to believe his luck .. Not only an ongoing war to brush up the Churchill tribute act , endless photo opportinities in India of all places - in a JCB factory ffs .. brmm brmm, crunchitty crunchitty. And now we now have the return of the Maddie Show [aka the Fragrant Kate and Gerry Saturday Night Takeaway ] to dominate the headlines and the guest star is a fucking German - absolute fucking bingo . What next .. the Patel woman sets up a free deal with the Argies to dump asylum seekers in Buenos Aries. Next weeks PMQ sees Starmer gobbing a twirling green one over the dispatch box smack into the face of the Rees Mogg streak of piss with overspray landing in Nadine Dorries's crinkly cleavage.

That Andrew Neil might be a bit of a cunt but during the Netflix reality TV show about Savile he was the only guest celeb who got anywhere close to pressurising him by using his years of media shithousery skills to actually ask pertinent questions of him which certainly got the cunt sweating and almost but not quite got some semblance of an admission from the fucking sack of shit . Halfway through the programme Mrs Kurtz looked up from her book and remarked "Sweet Jesus ..Savile looked like he fucking stunk to high heaven" . One thing was perfectly clear , old jug ears Charlie Boy, Thatcher , the BBC and the rest of the sychophants brigade were well and truly mugged off good and proper by the weapons grade weirdo.

We have an Aunt aka Cuntuss Interuptuss " What was she in .. was it Home and Away or King Lear at the RSC .. Is he a real gay or has he got kids .. Thought she was dead or was it the other one .. Ooh, that Mrs Browns Boys is so good but it's annoying the way it clashes with the Michael McIntyre show "

Chic Murray RIP , Sean Lock RIP .. that is all and goodnight

"That's a very good question" .. " and what a twat you are for asking it" under the breath response by any squirming answer avoiding politician

Boss - "Ok everyone , we're starting dress down Fridays next week." Bert - dob fuck knows but mid to late 60's and definitely longest serving team member - "So what' s all this dress down palaver then ?" Us - "Just wear the stuff you'd wear at weekend Bert" Friday - Us - DM's , Ruts t shirts , Harringtons etc. Bert .. Laura Ashley floral print pinafore dress , cerise tights , sling back peep toe stilettos.

That pair of soppy cunts Keats and Byron could have learned a thing or two from you Rev ... I also picture Starmer cracking off a sly one under the desk when he and Rayner appear together on TV

The continuing tale of epic shithousery in Muurica when a motorist exercised his constitutional rights under the "do what the fuck I like" amendment when some inconsiderate locals were blocking the route of his leisurely evening drive. Good news is , since it's in Wisconsin and goes to trial he'll more than likely get the judge who last week was the compere at the pasty faced AR15 totin' blubbering hillbilly cunts gig and declare the patriotic motorist not guilty of absolutely any fucking thing at all and furthermore fully entitled to compensation payment towards the bodyshop bill for his vehicle damage. I'm just looking forward to the Fox News coverage .. after all, we could all do with a laugh these days

Say what you like about tories .. they don't fuck about when it comes to distraction news stories .

Has anyone ever seen a Talibanner smile ? All we ever get is scowling gun totin' flag shaggers . Lighten up you miserable fucks. You've got what you always wanted not to mention the best comeback tour of the century since Barry Manilows Vegas residency. A few pallet loads of Mrs Browns Boys and On the Buses VHS box sets with some Engelbert Humperdink compilation C90 cassettes thrown in would do the trick.

A referral to the DILLIGAF desk always did it for me . Thankfully the regimental padre was never one to fuck around needlessly.

There was me thinking this was a post about 'may contain nuts' package warnings .. it's obviously about something much more trivial

Rob Brydon is often mistaken for Ben Miller who is often mistaken for Anton du Beke .. cunts one and all .. and one of them is often seen with Alexander Armstrong. All it needs is Laurence Fox , John .. I'm a scouser I am .. Bishop and Giles Brandreth for cuntery bingo

The Rantzen bitch just about gets my vote .. with all her fucking childline this and childline that bollocks which is merely her idea of reparation for being cosy as fuck with 'the management' at the time when the you know what sea of shit was occurring at the BBC and she naturally was unaware of anything untoward.

All the flak directed towards Robinson is well deserved , but forget the tattered minge and botoxed face to match .. if you really want to witness full on thrombosis inducing rage just shout out as you walk past her "Oi ! ... you SCOUSE cunt". Believe me , that really will seriously fuck her up something rotten.