Eric Cuntman

When you say that some of The locals are your cousins... .. you mean all of them don't you?

And it's 'summoned'. Like Orgo and Fatumch. 'Summonsed' is what you get if you abandon a car outside your council flat. Lol.

It's my turn to lick @Ape™️'s bum-bum this week.

"This week, oi aaarve been mostly a close personal friend of... Bob Carolgees."

Aimi McDonald... oh yes.

Did Simon The Canaanite beat you one-handed at pool?

Good old Frank. Sat among the stars, but looking at the gutter.

It's like one of those Russians that's been experimented on in prison and was never really normal again afterwards.

It's probably a reference to The Last Supper. Being a 'close personal friend' of Jesus, I'm sure Dyslexic would have been present.

@Cuntybaws is going to post the Freddie Lounds clip when he reads this.

Did Reggie ever chop your head off for dropping cake crumbs on Violet's sitting room carpet?

Did you go to school with the Kray twins?

A few weeks ago, I mentioned Curtis Warren. You claimed to know him personally. A little while later, Punkape mentions a grouse shoot, you claimed to know the gamekeeper (and spouse) personally... and now @Trucking Funt has mentioned a Cape Verde hotel, apparently, you know the owners personally. Anybody you don't actually know personally?

Des was half Jewish and half Irish. I quite like an 'Irish Jew', with dumplings of course.

I'd love to bruise her kidneys with my pork-hammer.

'Put that down Shep!'

u ok hun? 🌈🦄

Baaaaaaiiiiirrrr-kin-ed.

When they've finished with Ratty's '2000AD' collection.

October 1984 edition. I've still got a pile of them from the 80s.

What's his name?

Fucking quality. A perfect assessment of the media agenda to lionise minorities. Out of licks.

You, Raasclaat and Saucepants should get together and discuss who has the shiniest Gulfstream.

Phil Taylor. 16 individual world titles. Unmatched in any other competitive sport/game. Hamilton's F1 career is secondary to his true vocation, which is being an attention seeking, sympathy mongering, black supremacist fucking shitcunt. James Hunt would have put the wanker into a wall at 180 mph, and got his girlfriend pregnant before the paramedics had found his head. Lol.

Real name... Eric Wimp.