Sorrento

[Decimus]

The purpose of my trip to the boot is to attend the wedding of a friend, who in his infinite wisdom, has decided to have it Sorrento.

It appears that it's a popular wedding destination for British couples who think that just because they regularly eat alphabetti spaghetti, they somehow have an affinity with Italian culture. Sorrento, Naples and the whole mezziagiorno is the Dolmio sauce to Tuscany's truffle-infused sophistication. Despite having an inexplicable reputation amongst the chattering Crawley classes as a hub of class, it's a fucking shit hole. Half the buildings are crumbling and dilapidated, and the local populace are of a filthy, swarthy appearance and mentality more in tune with the Middle East.

My mind was made up on this halfway inbetween being cornered by a growling stray dog on the way to my hotel and noticing bare-footed children playing down a rubbish strewn side street.

Fucking disgusting.

 

[camberwell gypsy]

1 minute ago, Decimus said:

The purpose of my trip to the boot is to attend the wedding of a friend, who in his infinite wisdom, has decided to have it Sorrento.

It appears that it's a popular wedding destination for British couples who think that just because they regularly eat alphabetti spaghetti, they somehow have an affinity with Italian culture. Sorrento, Naples and the whole mezziagiorno is the Dolmio sauce to Tuscany's truffle-infused sophistication. Despite having an inexplicable reputation amongst the chattering Crawley classes as a hub of class, it's a fucking shit hole. Half the buildings are crumbling and dilapidated, and the local populace are of a filthy, swarthy appearance and mentality more in tune with the Middle East.

My mind was made up on this halfway inbetween being cornered by a growling stray dog on the way to my hotel and noticing bare-footed children playing down a rubbish strewn side street.

Fucking disgusting.

 

Sounds like Bognor Regis where I'm fucking holed up at the moment. Except here I'm surrounded by fat cunts wearing Portsmouth shirts and Eastern Europeans. I'm here for a 70th Birthday party. Its fucking grim Decs. 

[Neil]

Get yourself to Don Alfonso's in Sant Agata,Michelin star tucker in a lovely little town.Have you been offered an iPad off the back of a Vespa yet?

[Frank]

16 hours ago, Decimus said:

The purpose of my trip to the boot is to attend the wedding of a friend, who in his infinite wisdom, has decided to have it Sorrento.

It appears that it's a popular wedding destination for British couples who think that just because they regularly eat alphabetti spaghetti, they somehow have an affinity with Italian culture. Sorrento, Naples and the whole mezziagiorno is the Dolmio sauce to Tuscany's truffle-infused sophistication. Despite having an inexplicable reputation amongst the chattering Crawley classes as a hub of class, it's a fucking shit hole. Half the buildings are crumbling and dilapidated, and the local populace are of a filthy, swarthy appearance and mentality more in tune with the Middle East.

My mind was made up on this halfway inbetween being cornered by a growling stray dog on the way to my hotel and noticing bare-footed children playing down a rubbish strewn side street.

Fucking disgusting.

 

Babbling bollocks. If you insist on using a proxy during your make-believe overseas trips, at least add a little humour. Garrulous fucking bore. 

Wanker. 

[Decimus]

Weak, Bill Stickers-lite bollocks.

Crawl back into bed alongside your haggard, menopausal, ginger wife, Mr. Roops.

[scotty]

24 minutes ago, Frank said:

Babbling bollocks. If you insist on using a proxy during your make-believe overseas trips, at least add a little humour. Garrulous fucking bore. 

Wanker. 

I thought you'd pop up like secondary cancer to defend these greasy dago cunts, you greasy dago cunt. Fuck off. 

On topic decs, there are some cracking spots along the Amalfi but I'd have to agree that Sorrento isn't one of them. I rarely claim any great knowledge about such things, however having been married to a Neapolitan for 30 years we've been down that way with monotonous regularity and all I'd say is, should you decide to drop in on Naples while there then nail down absolutely everything, keep your car windows closed and the doors locked, and try not to stop. You have been warned. 

[Neil]

I'm off to Verona tomorrow and the weather is fucking dogshit,I do hope you're not having all the sun down there,I fucking hate it when others get sunburnt when I get pissed on.Buon fucking giorno

[Ape™️]

36 minutes ago, Frank said:

Babbling bollocks. If you insist on using a proxy during your make-believe overseas trips, at least add a little humour. Garrulous fucking bore. 

Wanker. 

If ever a comment was more appropriate to the author than this one, I’d like to fucking see it.

[Frank]

On 26/05/2019 at 08:12, Decimus said:

Weak, Bill Stickers-lite bollocks.

Crawl back into bed alongside your haggard, menopausal, ginger wife, Mr. Roops.

I’m desperately looking forward to our ‘meeting’ at Arrivals on Wednesday. In all likelihood, there’s more chance of Eric turning up at Clerkenwell Design Week in a tutu, than you getting a bit tasty in Terminal 1. Stupid fucking cunt. 

[Decimus]

11 minutes ago, Frank said:

I’m desperately looking forward to our ‘meeting’ at Arrivals on Wednesday. In all likelihood, there’s more chance of Eric turning up at Clerkenwell Design Week in a tutu, than you getting a bit tasty in Terminal 1. Stupid fucking cunt. 

Unless I decide to spend the rest of my days alongside greasy, yellow skinned semi-Arabs like yourself, I'll be coming home. The onus is on you, but if you do happen to turn up, I'm not joking when I say that I'm going to split your swarthy fucking nose across your stupid old fucking face.

[Cuntybaws]

5 hours ago, scotty said:

I thought you'd pop up like secondary cancer to defend these greasy dago cunts, you greasy dago cunt. Fuck off. 

On topic decs, there are some cracking spots along the Amalfi but I'd have to agree that Sorrento isn't one of them. I rarely claim any great knowledge about such things, however having been married to a Neapolitan for 30 years we've been down that way with monotonous regularity and all I'd say is, should you decide to drop in on Naples while there then nail down absolutely everything, keep your car windows closed and the doors locked, and try not to stop. You have been warned. 

See Naples and die, if you’re lucky. 

Portofino’s another hugely overrated shithole, populated entirely by people who seem to have Italian as a third language at best. 

[Mrs Roops]

...all this bollox about "blocking" yet the offended octad still make an effort to ignore their right to ignore...

[Frank]

1 minute ago, Decimus said:

Unless I decide to spend the rest of my days alongside greasy, yellow skinned semi-Arabs like yourself, I'll be coming home. The onus is on you, but if you do happen to turn up, I'm not joking when I say that I'm going to split your swarthy fucking nose across your stupid old fucking face.

Apart from arriving at Stansted at least 9 hours before your scheduled flight, what’s got you into such a state?

[Frank]

3 minutes ago, Mrs Roops said:

...all this bollox about "blocking" yet the offended octad still make an effort to ignore their right to ignore...

Are you coming down for brekkie, or shall I bring it up?

[scotty]

14 minutes ago, Frank said:

Are you coming down for brekkie, or shall I bring it up?

That's the first amusing thing you've posted in four years. Keep it up. 👍

[Penny Farthing]

I would loved to have ignored the blockers but when you have a sidebar that shows what they have posted and several of them fixated with mentioning me on every other post and of accusing me of using multi logins, it is impossible for any reasonable person not to respond. When I logged out last night almost instantly there were "two" posters discussing me in a way that I have only ever seen done of the pisstazza attempts at the rerun of SOC which are of which I need to say nothing other than all the "posters" have identical ip addresses. I will repeat what I have said before. I have only one login here and in practical terms for me were I to attempt to set a multi up here it would be spotted almost instantly by the admins. However for some with extra telephone lines and service provider (business lines etc) that might be possible.

[Frank]

1 minute ago, scotty said:

That's the first amusing thing you've posted in four years. Keep it up. 👍

I can honestly say that although you often make me cringe, you’ve never once made me laugh. Not now, not ever.. never. 

[Mrs Roops]

22 minutes ago, Frank said:

Are you coming down for brekkie, or shall I bring it up?

You did that last night in the hall, have you cleared it up?

[Frank]

9 minutes ago, Glowworm said:

I would loved to have ignored the blockers but when you have a sidebar that shows what they have posted and several of them fixated with mentioning me on every other post and of accusing me of using multi logins, it is impossible for any reasonable person not to respond. When I logged out last night almost instantly there were "two" posters discussing me in a way that I have only ever seen done of the pisstazza attempts at the rerun of SOC which are of which I need to say nothing other than all the "posters" have identical ip addresses. I will repeat what I have said before. I have only one login here and in practical terms for me were I to attempt to set a multi up here it would be spotted almost instantly by the admins. However for some with extra telephone lines and service provider (business lines etc) that might be possible.

I found it almost impossible running just the one account. I use Punkape as light relief when Frank struggles to articulate. Bubba when I’m drunk. 

[Penny Farthing]

Any I must go .. me and my dear little friend are going to Plymouth today .. Byeeeee!!!!!

[Mrs Roops]

14 minutes ago, Glowworm said:

I would loved to have ignored the blockers but when you have a sidebar that shows what they have posted and several of them fixated with mentioning me on every other post and of accusing me of using multi logins, it is impossible for any reasonable person not to respond. When I logged out last night almost instantly there were "two" posters discussing me in a way that I have only ever seen done of the pisstazza attempts at the rerun of SOC which are of which I need to say nothing other than all the "posters" have identical ip addresses. I will repeat what I have said before. I have only one login here and in practical terms for me were I to attempt to set a multi up here it would be spotted almost instantly by the admins. However for some with extra telephone lines and service provider (business lines etc) that might be possible.

Glowworm, I wish you wouldn't ignore my advice. In times like this one should always play the long game.

[Frank]

9 minutes ago, Glowworm said:

Any I must go .. me and my dear little friend are going to Plymouth today .. Byeeeee!!!!!

I certainly wouldn’t bother with all of this if it wasn’t for you and some of the other odd cunts on here. We need you, Pen. 

[scotty]

50 minutes ago, Frank said:

I can honestly say that although you often make me cringe, you’ve never once made me laugh. Not now, not ever.. never. 

Given that 99% of your output could be used as a dictionary definition of "cringeworthy", that's a pretty hollow statement. Add to that the unavoidable fact that you are second only to Pen in the Being Told to Fuck Off handicap, and I'd say your best bet was to either follow that oft-repeated advice or to finally succumb to your mythical cancer. 

 

[Decimus]

1 hour ago, Frank said:

Are you coming down for brekkie, or shall I bring it up?

I imagine that by the time she's dragged her decrepit carcass down the stairs or you've ascended on the Stannah, the boiled eggs would be cold. It'd be better for everyone involved if you shoved your head in the boiling water and just had toast.

Pair of past-it fucking cunts.