New Towns

[CCArchive]

What a load of hideous places, populated with social problems and malingerers. Many would rate high on a cuntometer. The first wave of these toilets include Basildon, Stevenage and Harlow. What a load of shitcunt holes.

[Guest Lady Penelope]

Cunt Central all of them and they shoulbe be nuked.

[Guest Bill Stickers]

Don't forget Stevenage and Milton Keynes.

[Decimus]

I have absolutely no opinion whatsoever on the middle two. But isn't it stating the fucking obvious that the northern shithole and the Welsh dump are going to be absolutely horrendous? What with them being full of heroin addicted northern scum, benefit scroungers and male vocal choirs? What's your next big reveal going to be, Frank is a waste of skin? Manky has got special needs? Neil is a sexual deviant?

[cuntspotter]

This is quite true....EXCEPT.......... Cwmbran is the cleanest and most modern town in the valley. It gets progressively worse the further north you go. Blaenavon makes Cwmbran look like Chelsea.

[camberwell gypsy]

Edenbridge, Kent. Its not a new town but I hate the fucking place.

[Cuntybaws]

2 hours ago, Decimus said:

I have absolutely no opinion whatsoever on the middle two. But isn't it stating the fucking obvious that the northern shithole and the Welsh dump are going to be absolutely horrendous? What with them being full of heroin addicted northern scum, benefit scroungers and male vocal choirs? 

I suggest then, in the strongest possible terms, that you avoid East Kilbride, Cumbernauld and Glenrothes. These shitholes provide indirect evidence for the existence of a multiverse because each one is indisputably the arsehole of their respective planets.

[Guest DingTheRioja]

Anything south of Sheffield... actually.. south of the M62

[Guest Manky]

5 hours ago, Decimus said:

I have absolutely no opinion whatsoever  on the middle two. But isn't it stating the fucking obvious that the northern shithole and the Welsh dump are going to be absolutely horrendous? What with them being full of heroin addicted northern scum, benefit scroungers and male vocal choirs? What's your next big reveal going to be, Frank is a waste of skin? Manky has got special needs? Neicouldl is a sexual deviant?

You are Northernist. I could undersytandLWhat edot

[Decimus]

13 minutes ago, Manky said:

You are Northernist. I could undersytandLWhat edot

Jesus fucking christ, Manky. Pull yourself together, man.

[Guest luke swarm]

I think the epitome of this as a not very good idea is Telford....allow me to expand on that.

In the 60s the town of Birmingham came up with the great idea of getting rid of all their cunts in one fell swoop, so they designated a group of Villages in Shropshire as the cunt collective of Telford.....built a concrete jungle town centre devoid of any character or soul and then put up thousands of shoddy houses with lovely names like Woodside and Brookside.

Released all the chav cunts into this new environment to live unhappily ever after...said cunts promptly set about destroying their own community and reproducing at a geometric rate, these chav cunts come in all colours but alas only one size, fat greasy fun size.

It really is shit and although it does not pip Dudley, which is a medieval era centre of cuntage it does illustrate the subject matter of this nom.  The odd thing is that Birmingham, which should have improved due to this enforced exodus of cunts saw no discernible improvement...I guess some places are just meant to be shit no matter what.    

[Guest Manky]

22 hours ago, Decimus said:

Jesus fucking christ, Manky. Pull yourself together, man.

My £55 not very fucking Smart Phone jammed up and would do nothing except send even with errors. I thought "which sad bellend with nowt better to do will respond first". Decimus, I would like to thank you for pre-empting everyone else on the site to look a complete prick.

[Decimus]

14 minutes ago, Manky said:

My £55 not very fucking Smart Phone jammed up and would do nothing except send even with errors. I thought "which sad bellend with nowt better to do will respond first". Decimus, I would like to thank you for pre enting everyone else on the site look a complete prick.

This still makes absolutely no fucking sense I'm afraid, Manky. Please stop trying to communicate with me until you have rediscovered your grasp, albeit a minimal one, of the English language. This pidgin northern, illiterate shit you keep churning out is like reading the scrawls of a child with severe special needs.

[Guest Manky]

1 minute ago, Decimus said:

This still makes absolutely no fucking sense I'm afraid, Manky. Please stop trying to communicate with me until you have rediscovered your grasp, albeit a minimal one, of the English language. This pidgin northern, illiterate shit you keep churning out is like reading the scrawls of a child with severe special needs.

I need a new phone. I think mine is of the "Beccles" family of mobile phones and has been bred with a dibdob Nokia 3310

[Guest MikeD]

4 hours ago, Cuntybaws said:

I suggest then, in the strongest possible terms, that you avoid East Kilbride, Cumbernauld and Glenrothes. These shitholes provide indirect evidence for the existence of a multiverse because each one is indisputably the arsehole of their respective planets.

Of the three you mentioned I've only been to Glenrothes and if ever a place was a prime candidate to be used as a nuclear weapons test facility then that's it.

Now I think back to what it looked like, it probably has.

[Guest DingTheRioja]

21 minutes ago, MikeD said:

Of the three you mentioned I've only been to Glenrothes and if ever a place was a prime candidate to be used as a nuclear weapons test facility then that's it.

Now I think back to what it looked like, it probably has.

Before, during, and after.... all in one... bargain!!!!!

49 minutes ago, Decimus said:

This still makes absolutely no fucking sense I'm afraid, Manky. Please stop trying to communicate with me until you have rediscovered your grasp, albeit a minimal one, of the English language. This pidgin northern, illiterate shit you keep churning out is like reading the scrawls of a child with severe special needs.

Racist!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Roops? Dec is being racist against northerners!

[Guest Couldn't give a shit]

Not really a new town but the Ordsall estate in Salford that was built over the ruins of Lancashire's industrial past should be subjected to an artillery barrage of shells containing Anthrax, botulinum and VX nerve gas to ensure its sub-human inhabitants cannot escape into the general population before being set ablaze by mass aerial bombardment of napalm.

[Guest Drew P Pissflaps]

Thetford is the shitest town because a) it is for London overspill, and therefore full of cunts,  b)it is in Norfolk, c) it is full of cunts, d) the cunts it is full of are cockney, e) cunts from London live there. 

I think that covers the main issues with the place.

[Guest Manky]

Telford doesn't really exist. It is a dozen roundabouts connected by dual carriageway's with no town. Milton Keynes is a pretend American town. Skelmersdale is an overspill town for Liverpool and that is scary. None of the other new towns are any better. My guess would be 95% of members of this site live in new towns. Extreme cuntism isn't natural, it develops over time due to the surrounding environment and proximity to other cunts. Come to think of it, Stickers and Decimus must live together according to my theories.

[Jiggerycock]

Here's a leftfield one for you - West Wycombe!

High Wycombe is well-known as a breeding ground for ne'er do wells, Jihadi's, not-rights and wrong un's  set in an urban landscape that want's to twin with Mogadishu.

But West Wycombe? Why Jiggers you jest sirrah? Is this not the land of the Hellfire Caves in all their Byronesque glory? The gateway to the rolling Chiltern Hills? The very epitome of leafy suburbia?

No it bloody, flipping well isn't, matey-boy!

You know that bit in 'American Werewolf in London' where the two Septic Hitchikers stumble into that pub on the Yorkshire Moors, to be told to fuck off by Brian Glover (and Rik Mayall, if you look closely, film trivia fans)?

Well West Wycombe is like that.

Forever stuck in Early Closing Day somnolence, its inbred, snuggle-toothed inhabitants hiding and cackling behind their webbed, tissue-like rat-fink claws at any civilian that strays into their little 'Ville.

Avoid! It's just plain creepy.

[Guest Bill Stickers]

28 minutes ago, Jiggerycock said:

Here's a leftfield one for you - West Wycombe!

High Wycombe is well-known as a breeding ground for ne'er do wells, Jihadi's, not-rights and wrong un's  set in an urban landscape that want's to twin with Mogadishu.

But West Wycombe? Why Jiggers you jest sirrah? Is this not the land of the Hellfire Caves in all their Byronesque glory? The gateway to the rolling Chiltern Hills? The very epitome of leafy suburbia?

No it bloody, flipping well isn't, matey-boy!

You know that bit in 'American Werewolf in London' where the two Septic Hitchikers stumble into that pub on the Yorkshire Moors, to be told to fuck off by Brian Glover (and Rik Mayall, if you look closely, film trivia fans)?

Well West Wycombe is like that.

Forever stuck in Early Closing Day somnolence, its inbred, snuggle-toothed inhabitants hiding and cackling behind their webbed, tissue-like rat-fink claws at any civilian that strays into their little 'Ville.

Avoid! It's just plain creepy.

I agree with your points about Wycombe proper, although for reasons I may one day divulge I'm very fond of the place.

However, West Wycombe is pretty gentrified. Try trundling down the road to Chinnor if you want to meet some real inbred Oxfordshire specimens.

[Guest Drew P Pissflaps]

1 hour ago, Manky said:

Telford doesn't really exist. It is a dozen roundabouts connected by dual carriageway's with no town. Milton Keynes is a pretend American town. Skelmersdale is an overspill town for Liverpool and that is scary. None of the other new towns are any better. My guess would be 95% of members of this site live in new towns. Extreme cuntism isn't natural, it develops over time due to the surrounding environment and proximity to other cunts. Come to think of it, Stickers and Decimus must live together according to my theories.

I reckon that as well as sharing a home they also share DNA and bodily fluids.

[Guest Gong Farmer]

54 minutes ago, Jiggerycock said:

Here's a leftfield one for you - West Wycombe!

High Wycombe is well-known as a breeding ground for ne'er do wells, Jihadi's, not-rights and wrong un's  set in an urban landscape that want's to twin with Mogadishu.

But West Wycombe? Why Jiggers you jest sirrah? Is this not the land of the Hellfire Caves in all their Byronesque glory? The gateway to the rolling Chiltern Hills? The very epitome of leafy suburbia?

No it bloody, flipping well isn't, matey-boy!

You know that bit in 'American Werewolf in London' where the two Septic Hitchikers stumble into that pub on the Yorkshire Moors, to be told to fuck off by Brian Glover (and Rik Mayall, if you look closely, film trivia fans)?

Well West Wycombe is like that.

Forever stuck in Early Closing Day somnolence, its inbred, snuggle-toothed inhabitants hiding and cackling behind their webbed, tissue-like rat-fink claws at any civilian that strays into their little 'Ville.

Avoid! It's just plain creepy.

Is the Desborough Road in High Wycombe still referred to as the Khyber Pass?  

[Witheredscrote]

On ‎11‎/‎11‎/‎2015‎ ‎14‎:‎06‎:‎24, camberwell gypsy said:

Edenbridge, Kent. Its not a new town but I hate the fucking place.

Yeh , fucking Edenbridge , full of Gorgers who would skin a turd for a penny.

[Decimus]

1 hour ago, Drew P Pissflaps said:

I reckon that as well as sharing a home they also share DNA and bodily fluids.

All we share is the joint opinion that you are a complete waste of fucking skin, and the disbelief that you can live with the knowledge that you are on an intellectual Par with Manky. Any self respecting man would have done the decent thing years ago. Get on with it and stop wasting valuable oxygen.