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Chatting on the Tube


Witheredscrote

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So the latest gimmick on London Underground is to get people chatting.  After badges for pregnant passengers etc, some stupid naïve cunts are handing out 'Tube Chat' badges to travellers to encourage conversation.   Can you imagine sitting there, and an unwashed, smelly, and incoherent badge toting  Bill Stickers, hanging from a strap, starts chatting to you. Fuck, I would go and join ISIS, put on a rucksack and join him for a 'chat' next morning, hopefully taking out some cunt carrying golf clubs at the same time.

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Guest DingTheRioja
8 minutes ago, Punkape said:

Only the great unwashed use the Tube....

 

Still sleeping there then?

 

anyway, it's southern miserable cunts who don't talk to each other, nothing to do with the tube.

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12 minutes ago, DingTheRioja said:

anyway, it's southern miserable cunts who don't talk to each other, nothing to do with the tube.

Better the silence of southerners than being lumbered with some garrulous northern cunt who reeks of black pudding.

seriously-just-fuck-off-black.png

This is the only badge you need on the tube.

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30 minutes ago, DingTheRioja said:

Still sleeping there then?

 

anyway, it's southern miserable cunts who don't talk to each other, nothing to do with the tube.

Wise words indeed, ding. While I was billeted in the midlands for six years I was horrified by the sheer amount of casual conversation struck up in any situation. Back down south I'm in my comfort zone, no fucker speaks to anyone they don't know. 

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1 hour ago, scotty said:

Wise words indeed, ding. While I was billeted in the midlands for six years I was horrified by the sheer amount of casual conversation struck up in any situation. Back down south I'm in my comfort zone, no fucker speaks to anyone they don't know. 

They wanted to build a tube in Manchester some years ago. Some cunt couldn't read the plans and we ended up with another hole going nowhere and full of water at the bottom. I doubt if you could be arsed talking to any cunt while travelling at terminal velocity to meet your maker.

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Guest DingTheRioja
1 hour ago, Cuntybaws said:

Better the silence of southerners...

 

It's the only decent thing about southerners, that they don't/won't/can't talk to you.

The last cockerknee I spoke to made less sense than the pissed and stoned aussie who was serving, there's so much superfluous shit in every sentence it's like a bad version of Up Pompeii, only with more poofs.

 

1 hour ago, Bubba C said:

Looks more like a ball? 

He likes balls. Chocolate salty ones are his preferred...

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Guest Wizardsleeve
12 hours ago, DingTheRioja said:

Choose?

Can't.

I'm rather certain the bastards can speak English, they choose not to toying with our emotions and instincts to go for the claw hammers, and other bludgeoning instruments.  

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Guest Wizardsleeve
28 minutes ago, Drew P Pissflaps said:

the only thing that I have ever wanted to say to someone on the tube is "get the fuck out of my way you cunt"

Says it all, really.  All this forced pleasantries and happy banter are for cunts.  It's bad enough being subjected to the body odours of the cretins jammed into the carriage with you; they don't respect your space to read your paper, and drink your coffee, and remain at peace with yourself, no....they have to ask the obvious "are you reading the paper?  Anything good going on, then?"  As a matter of fact, there is a very interesting article about some nosy fucking cunt who got bludgeoned to death with the heel of a boot on this very tube.  It will be printed tomorrow.  

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20 hours ago, Snatch said:

Half the cunts on the tube choose not to speak English.

I should imagine buying tickets off them and asking for train times is a bit of a cunt then? 

When I was a little girl all the staff spoke English on the trains. "Yeah man. De next train is going um.......Clapham Junction innit ayah"?

Was that racist? 

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Guest Lady Penelope
21 hours ago, Manky said:

They wanted to build a tube in Manchester some years ago. Some cunt couldn't read the plans and we ended up with another hole going nowhere and full of water at the bottom. I doubt if you could be arsed talking to any cunt while travelling at terminal velocity to meet your maker.

There is supposed to be a cavern below the Arndale Centre at Manchester where a station on the Picc to Vic tube line was going to be, that was cancelled on grounds of cost and replaced with the Metrolink . Ironically more than 40 years later they have spent much more money than the Picc-Vic would have cost on making surface links to enable trains to run direct from Piccadilly to Victoria.

 

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Guest Drew P Pissflaps
1 hour ago, Punkape said:

You should throw yourself under the carriages

you vacuous cunt. theres no need to aim for the carriages when the middle lines have about 750volts permanently flowing through them. But dont take my word for it, try giving it a lick rather than the window to your bedsit.

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Guest Lady Penelope
1 minute ago, Drew P Pissflaps said:

you vacuous cunt. theres no need to aim for the carriages when the middle lines have about 750volts permanently flowing through them. But dont take my word for it, try giving it a lick rather than the window to your bedsit.

Licking the electrified rail .. what a shocking thing to do :o

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4 minutes ago, Lady Penelope said:

There is supposed to be a cavern below the Arndale Centre at Manchester where a station on the Picc to Vic tube line was going to be, that was cancelled on grounds of cost and replaced with the Metrolink . Ironically more than 40 years later they have spent much more money than the Picc-Vic would have cost on making surface links to enable trains to run direct from Piccadilly to Victoria.

 

That will be the Ordsall Chord you refer to. The station below the Arndale is a fact, it is still there. Transport has been a clusterfuck in the city centre but is not too bad now with the Metro link. The city doesn't have a bus station.

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