Guest Snatch Posted August 30, 2017 Report Share Posted August 30, 2017 4 minutes ago, Bill Stickers said: Haha! You cry baby cunt. Fuck off to the mocking shop then you utter belter. How long do you reckon before your coolered again? And was is belter for a word? Very lame. As for the mocking shop, you have no idea and it's way over your tiny head. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bill Stickers Posted August 30, 2017 Report Share Posted August 30, 2017 Just now, Snatch said: How long do you reckon before your coolered again? And was is belter for a word? Very lame. As for the mocking shop, you have no idea and it's way over your tiny head. I know enough about the mocking shop to know it's a safe space for about 8 people who sexually interfere with Vespas, and that I've got no interesting being the top dog of two forums at the current time. Why do you think I'll be banned? Because I don't like you? I'm not sure Roops holds your emotions in the highest regard. Belter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roadkill Posted August 30, 2017 Report Share Posted August 30, 2017 4 minutes ago, Snatch said: How long do you reckon before your coolered again? And was is belter for a word? Very lame. As for the mocking shop, you have no idea and it's way over your tiny head. Careful Snatch. All of this chav talk has got me worried he's going to try and get you inebriated on cheap tac and Tecso brand cider before "Brakin' you in propa, like." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted August 30, 2017 Report Share Posted August 30, 2017 Just now, Bill Stickers said: I know enough about the mocking shop to know it's a safe space for about 8 people who sexually interfere with Vespas, and that I've got no interesting being the top dog of two forums at the current time. Why do you think I'll be banned? Because I don't like you? I'm not sure Roops holds your emotions in the highest regard. Belter. You have to be there to be banned. Safe spaces are your thing, not mine. Your the top dog of fuck all. You still know nothing of the shop. I don't give a flying fuck what Roops thinks. Her opinion is of no importance to me. Just like yours or anyone else's here is of no importance. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted August 30, 2017 Report Share Posted August 30, 2017 4 minutes ago, Roadkill said: Careful Snatch. All of this chav talk has got me worried he's going to try and get you inebriated on cheap tac and Tecso brand cider before "Brakin' you in propa, like." He's following me around quoting me RK. I think he might slightly rattled. After all, he did use the word belter. A real verbal kicking that was. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Lady Penelope Posted August 31, 2017 Report Share Posted August 31, 2017 Mr M'Butu got these people to look after his relatives Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted August 31, 2017 Author Report Share Posted August 31, 2017 2 minutes ago, The Lady Penelope said: Mr M'Butu got these people to look after his relatives They look friendlier than I do, pen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest nobgobbler Posted September 2, 2017 Report Share Posted September 2, 2017 On 30/08/2017 at 7:14 PM, Snatch said: He's following me around quoting me RK. I think he might slightly rattled. After all, he did use the word belter. A real verbal kicking that was. He's like a bad smell isn't he. Hopefully one day he'll overdose on laxative and shit himself to death. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snatch Posted September 2, 2017 Report Share Posted September 2, 2017 1 hour ago, nobgobbler said: He's like a bad smell isn't he. Hopefully one day he'll overdose on laxative and shit himself to death. That would be the best thing to happen here in a long time. Could take a few days for him to die though, being so full of shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted October 2, 2017 Author Report Share Posted October 2, 2017 Update: Old woman no. 2, the one with the broken hip, has sadly succumbed to her injuries and is now hobbling around in the hereafter. Watch out southampton geriatrics, scotty is on a hat trick. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted October 2, 2017 Report Share Posted October 2, 2017 1 minute ago, scotty said: Update: Old woman no. 2, the one with the broken hip, has sadly succumbed to her injuries and is now hobbling around in the hereafter. Watch out southampton geriatrics, scotty is on a hat trick. (in murky Southampton) SECOND WITCH: By the pricking of my thumbs, something evil this way comes THIRD WITCH: Fuck me it's that Scotty cunt! FIRST WITCH: Let's cheese it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted October 2, 2017 Author Report Share Posted October 2, 2017 11 minutes ago, ratcum said: (in murky Southampton) SECOND WITCH: By the pricking of my thumbs, something evil this way comes THIRD WITCH: Fuck me it's that Scotty cunt! FIRST WITCH: Let's cheese it I finally changed the avatar ratty, I trust you approve. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ratcum Posted October 2, 2017 Report Share Posted October 2, 2017 3 minutes ago, scotty said: I finally changed the avatar ratty, I trust you approve. 'bout fuckin time Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stubby Pecker Posted October 3, 2017 Report Share Posted October 3, 2017 22 hours ago, scotty said: I finally changed the avatar ratty, I trust you approve. Good work scotto, you're still a daft cunt for accepting such a burden in the first place or perhaps that's your modus operandi to lull them him like old Harold... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ape™️ Posted October 3, 2017 Report Share Posted October 3, 2017 22 hours ago, ratcum said: 'bout fuckin time I’d like your next avatar to be Henry from Thomas the Tank Engine, saying something terrible about Punkape or some other faggot-poof. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted August 13, 2018 Author Report Share Posted August 13, 2018 It's holiday time!!! The neighbours having no remaining old people to entrust to my "care", have asked me to look after their three cats. Well, I say three. The results have been nothing if not predictable; as the song goes, "and then there were two". The oldest one was poorly when they left, and third day in I go over the road to feed them as usual and find her hidden in a cupboard, covered in mud and shit and mewing pitifully. I get the wife to help me bathe the cat, and mingling in with the crap coming off it is blood pouring out its arsehole. I phone the neighbours to ask if I should get the vet out at Sunday rates, they said no, it's happened before and she'll be fine when she's dried off. So I leave her clean and comfortable on their sofa. Return an hour later to one dead cat, so I've wrapped up the body and left it in a box in their garage. (I mean wrapped in a blanket, not gift-wrapped, I hasten to add. I'm not that warped.) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted August 13, 2018 Report Share Posted August 13, 2018 23 minutes ago, scotty said: It's holiday time!!! The neighbours having no remaining old people to entrust to my "care", have asked me to look after their three cats. Well, I say three. The results have been nothing if not predictable; as the song goes, "and then there were two". The oldest one was poorly when they left, and third day in I go over the road to feed them as usual and find her hidden in a cupboard, covered in mud and shit and mewing pitifully. I get the wife to help me bathe the cat, and mingling in with the crap coming off it is blood pouring out its arsehole. I phone the neighbours to ask if I should get the vet out at Sunday rates, they said no, it's happened before and she'll be fine when she's dried off. So I leave her clean and comfortable on their sofa. Return an hour later to one dead cat, so I've wrapped up the body and left it in a box in their garage. (I mean wrapped in a blanket, not gift-wrapped, I hasten to add. I'm not that warped.) blood pouring out of its arsehole Scotty, good grief that must have been painful for the poor feline, one can only ponder how such catastrophic internal damage came about. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted August 13, 2018 Author Report Share Posted August 13, 2018 9 minutes ago, luke swarm said: blood pouring out of its arsehole Scotty, good grief that must have been painful for the poor feline, one can only ponder how such catastrophic internal damage came about. What are you implying luke? 🤔 Those charges were never proved. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted August 13, 2018 Report Share Posted August 13, 2018 3 hours ago, scotty said: Return an hour later to one dead cat, so I've wrapped up the body and left it in a box in their garage. (I mean wrapped in a blanket, not gift-wrapped, I hasten to add. I'm not that warped.) You can't polish a turd, but you can roll it in glitter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cuntybaws Posted August 13, 2018 Report Share Posted August 13, 2018 3 hours ago, luke swarm said: blood pouring out of its arsehole Scotty, good grief that must have been painful for the poor feline, one can only ponder how such catastrophic internal damage came about. Teacher: What did you do during the holidays, Billy? Billy: I stuck a banger up a cat's arse. Teacher: Rectum, Billy, rectum. Billy: I'll say it fucking wrecked 'im, blew his fuckin' tail clean off! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penny Farthing Posted August 13, 2018 Report Share Posted August 13, 2018 14 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said: You can't polish a turd, but you can roll it in glitter. Paul Gadd. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scotty Posted August 13, 2018 Author Report Share Posted August 13, 2018 9 minutes ago, Cuntybaws said: Teacher: What did you do during the holidays, Billy? Billy: I stuck a banger up a cat's arse. Teacher: Rectum, Billy, rectum. Billy: I'll say it fucking wrecked 'im, blew his fuckin' tail clean off! One for the sicki thread? 🤔 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake The Muss Posted August 13, 2018 Report Share Posted August 13, 2018 Scotty, you have a heart of gold but shit for brains, while being left with three such elders while the cuntbrain family swan off on holiday, it could only end in tears. May i suggest that if the family lay any blame on you that you might add those selfish cunts to the deceased list. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Filthy Cunt Posted August 13, 2018 Report Share Posted August 13, 2018 On 8/29/2017 at 11:02 PM, scotty said: So, the neighbours swan off to Cornwall for a week. Fair enough, but they ask me to "keep an eye" on his 93 year old mother, his wifes 87 year old mother and also her 92 year old aunt. Two days in, I take the aunts shopping round to her flat. She's wolfing down her lunch, watched by two paramedics. She's had a fall, but is refusing to be admitted to hospital. Later that day I get a call from the warden, she's had a second fall and is now in the hospital awaiting a hip replacement. Two more days and I get another call, this time from the mother in laws care home. She's just died, so can I please locate the relevant paperwork and notify the family. I should point out that the dead one was in palliative care for cancer already and the broken hip one is wheelchair bound having had a stroke last year, so I'm shirking most of the blame here. But lets face it, it's not looking too promising for the remaining one. With my current batting average I reckon she'll be dead by thursday, if she lasts that long; I've promised to take her Radio Times round there tomorrow, so stand by for further developments. I don't know anyone who would trust me to look after their pets, let alone relatives. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest luke swarm Posted August 13, 2018 Report Share Posted August 13, 2018 59 minutes ago, Filthy Cunt said: I don't know anyone who would trust me to look after their pets, let alone relatives. you sound like the kind of cunt who is often left behind to be looked after rather than the other way round, certainly no one in their right mind would wish you to accompany them anywhere. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.