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Heartbreak


Guest Lady Penelope

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Guest Lady Penelope
8 hours ago, camberwell gypsy said:

No wonder you were kicked off the Apollo moon mission "Look Mr Armstrong just aim the fucker at the moon. That'll do it". 

Please don't mention Mr Armstrong .. he had a terrible accident after a man with a white van sold him an invisible step ladder.

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Guest White van man
17 minutes ago, Lady Penelope said:

Please don't mention Mr Armstrong .. he had a terrible accident after a man with a white van sold him an invisible step ladder.

Sorry about Mr Armstrong. He asked for one with " one small step" but the invisible ones only came in large so he got that. I didn't think he would notice

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Guest Lady Penelope
19 minutes ago, White van man said:

Sorry about Mr Armstrong. He asked for one with " one small step" but the invisible ones only came in large so he got that. I didn't think he would notice

The gap between the steps was ok.

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11 hours ago, Lady Penelope said:

I bought a new roller blind for the kitchen window. On the pack it said "just cut to size", I normally judge things well by eye. I have cut the bastard, cunting, fucking thing about 12 inches too short :(

Next time, get Punkers to cut it for you. I'm sure he knows exactly how long 12 inches is.

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Guest Alfie Noakes
4 hours ago, Albert Ross said:

It's spelt millimetres you thick Americanised spelling brainwashed troglodyte.

 

Who the fuck let a small dicked little no mates spastic like you on here? Go and play with the other children, they may teach you something. I dont have as much time on my hands to spell check everyone and if my bastard tablet has US settings so be it, slow benefit scrounging day was it? I stopped picking up other's spelling errors a whie ago with one exception, punkape. Now run along little boy.

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Guest Earl Albert of Ross (Bt)
1 minute ago, Bubba C said:

If you’re looking for something to keep you occupied now you’ve finished your first edition Roger Red Hat, maybe you could analyse and correct the grammar on @Snatch‘s posts? That should keep you ticking over. 

How do I find the posts?

BTW, I'm struggling with the Janet and John volume 2.

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1 hour ago, ratcum said:

I know it's not pc, but that woman in a wheelchair in Silent Witness spooks the high fuck out of me.

She's like some 80s animatronic device

I bet she gives hawking the right horn. I didn't get through a brief history of time, but I'm sure there's a chapter in there about her. 

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6 hours ago, Lady Penelope said:

Are you the man who mistook his wife for a hat?

No, I don’t suffer from Prosopagnosia. However I have a feeling I’d struggle to tell you apart from a piss-soaked old tramp.

Are you still carrying Punkys’ handbag down at Our Lady of the Immaculate Nine Iron or what?

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Guest Lady Penelope
10 hours ago, ratcum said:

I know it's not pc, but that woman in a wheelchair in Silent Witness spooks the high fuck out of me.

She's like some 80s animatronic device

If its not pc it must be a mac.

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Guest Wizardsleeve
11 hours ago, Wolfie said:

Next time, get Punkers to cut it for you. I'm sure he knows exactly how long 12 inches is.

Finally, Punky can be useful for something.  His uncanny ability to know 12" by sight and the instinctual interior decorating capabilities that poofs like him possess would be perfect.  

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